Hey,
Recently i opened a 9 who is an acquaintance as i have met her a few times and just generally chatted but not for long or anything noticeable to stand out. Anyway i began talking to her on facebook a few weeks ago and have got a few IOIs like her liking some of my photos and texting/ starting conversations with me first. Although sometimes she takes a fair while to reply. Anyway we were going to meet up yesterday after a party she was going to as it was just down the road from my house.

So i was like mm well im not just going to wait around, so i met up with the ex girlfriend and we went to the movies. Hb9 was texting me asking what i was up to as she was at this party. So i tell her that im at the movies with the ex with a little :\ face to kind of show that i wasnt keen on seeing the ex. I did this as i wanted to show HSV as i was with another girl and not just waiting around for her.

The night ended with the ex and there was no reply from HB9, so at 11 i sent her another message.. still no reply. i ended up meeting up with my mate who was ment to meet the HB9 friend. so we drove to meet this friend who was about a 5-10 min drive but when we got there she said that the HB9 was with her and that they were going to asleep. i went home and by this time it was around 1 am and still no reply from HB9.

i get this message in the morning from HB9 saying "hey soo sorry my phone died and lucy (HB9 friend) wouldnt text you. i wanted to see you but she was being annoying and hell drunk hahah but it was funny, but yeah got shut down at 9 whos the ex?? xx"

so what are your thoughts on what i should do? i mean it seems pretty genuine as she apologized on FB chat aswell but i dont want to give in and give her power so that she feels its okay to do this. what are your thoughts on how to gain complete control..?

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you already want me, you just dont know it yet.

Give her another chance but make it a bit difficult to meet.

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plenty of possible external factors,

she could have been testing you for neediness,
possibly her and her friend were talking about you and the friend doesn't like you,
possibly she was with some other guy that night,
possibly you telling her you were with ex made her pissed off and jealous and she didn't want to meet you because she was mad,
possibly she was just telling the truth (combo of jealous and friend talking shit),
possibly she just has cold feet,
possibly she is just not into you,



a whole shit load of possible scenarios, trying to figure out why should be unimportant,

give her 1 more chance, if she flakes, forget about her and move on, if she is flaky or non responsive, don't keep texting her, don't try to contact, just ignore her, she has done nothing for you, why is she so important?, you offered her some value it is now time for her to invest, if she won't ignore her until she chases and offers some investment, if that doesn't happen she is just simply not that interested, that is life

thanks both of you, i appreciate that.

yeah she has showed interest and has tried to speak to me on facebook twice today but i ignored both of them. do you think i should continue normal game and explain my anger. As in say to her that what she did was rude and how its not an attractive quality in a girl. or?

_________________
you already want me, you just dont know it yet.

no don't react to her, just remain indifferent, give her one more chance, treat her as normal, no need to ignore, next time you invite her out if she flakes, just say something along the lines of, ok well i don't have time for this, then begin ignoring her (this means not contacting her/giving her attention, does not mean if she contacts you not responding) , and become low interest for a week or two, and leave it up for her to contact you, and initiate meetups, and make it a challenge for her to get them (for first week after 2nd flake if she wants to hang out and initiates, i suggest at least 1 time, being too busy)

So i went with what you guys said about remain indifferent and after a few minuetes of facebook chat i brought it up. She replied with this story of how she was sorry and her phone did run out of battery. She them seemed a little blunt and i had to leave so said goodbye. Whilst i was out tonight she sent me a message at 11, the conversation went as follows.

(let me know what i can improve and where i went wrong)

HB 11:00pm


ME
.

HB
hiii

ME
hey?

HB
im so bored how is your night going? X

ME
You know what i couldnt stop thinking about..

HB 12:00 am
no what were you thinking about? X

This is where i decided a mini freeze out (morning) for repayment of last night could even things out a little bit and restore a little power. My next thought was should i extend the mini freeze out for a couple of days, but what are your thoughts?

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you already want me, you just dont know it yet.

Well, let's begin by telling you how stupid of a mistake it was by telling her that, you were out at the movies with your ex-girlfriend. Personally, I see no reason why you would mention that, maybe you were hoping to incite jealousy or something.

That aside, you don't need to hear it from us, that she is attracted to you, because a lot of signs point to that. That being said, do not take this for granted. Ignoring her too much will lead her to think that you are NOT interested, and she will focus her time and efforts elsewhere.

There should always be a cat-and-string relation between your indifference and your interest in her.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

yeah thankyou and i hear what your saying. i hit up the ex line as thats who i was with at the time and i didnt want it getting back to her (HB) as they have mutual friends. I remember thinking it and being like yeah thats not a bad idea as she will potentially get jealous and i would not come across as desperate or needy and as if i was basing my night entirely on her as she was at a party and i was merely meeting her after.

Yeah i agree about incorporating in the cat and string theory, but over facebook and phone its a little harder as you cant use body language. So in what ways could i do this over these means? I still am wondering about the freeze out but am thinking i should speak to her maybe today and not in a few days. What are your thoughts? Also i think im just going to go back into normal conversation when i talk to her again and not try and continue on talk from last night?

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you already want me, you just dont know it yet.

Maybe tell her something like... "I couldnt stop thinking about how you would respond to that question."

This will come across as funny make her laugh a little bit.

Then when she responds say something like "Wow didnt think thats how you would repsond at all."

She will naturally say "how did you think i would respond?"

Then you can say something along the lines of "I thought you would be like "I hope he is thinking about me" cuz i know you are attracted to me".

A little cocky funny stuff in there. As I am fairly new to the game you may want to take this with a grain of salt. Would be curious to what some of the more experienced member have to say.