| I think you're focusing too much on what's going to happen with these girls. In your brain, you're running through situations. You think that you're in a good mindset because they're positive situations, but this is imagined confidence. "Alright, I'm gonna go over there, sit down, be confident, and they're going to start to like me" (with mental images to accompany the thoughts). That's a bad attitude to have. As soon as you get hit with a curveball from them, you go blank. They don't know what you have imagined, so they don't know how to feed you the right lines.
Instead, let your mind clear when you go up there. Just like in meditation, be intensely focused on your own body and all the feelings and emotions inside it. Not on the thoughts that cause the feelings, the feelings themselves. Use the attention you have left over to focus on your surroundings. Never think about what will happen in the future or what has happened in the past. Those are illusions and completely useless in pick up.
Listen as intently as you can to what they say. When you want to speak, you'll feel the slightest glimmer of thought, but not the distracting cloudiness of future or past projection. Allow that glimmer to come out. This does not mean blurt out words. In fact, speak more slowly. Show the girls that you have considered what they said, considered your response, and can deliver it with confidence. Whatever you say, it will be insightful and worth saying, because you are focused in the reality of the now, and the things you say are the truth that you are actively observing.
This post comes from my developing experience after reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, I recommend that you read it and put it into practice. I found it on this forum just after I joined (I think 3ish months ago) and my game has gone from nonexistent to useful and flexible.
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CHAT
