I wrote to her: "All the more reason I thought eskimos were good at getting the point..." (she's from a place far up north, but not really an eskimo)

Let's see what she answers.

Someone told me the conversation lacks sexual vibes.

Well, sexual vibes can come in at any time and they're not THAT big a thing to worry about.

So, the thing is this, you need to start talking about things which have a bit more substantial footing, discuss topics where you both can have long discussions about, all the teasing and the joking aside, she'll appreciate you far, far more when she sees that you're a smart, well-informed man with opinions.

Well, the conversation should transition to let's say, deeper topics now. But, that doesn't mean you should be all serious. Have a little joke with her every now and then and tease her but have a smart discussion with her. Oh, and try to get her number and if you have, call her.

Escalation should be continuous till the closing of the deal.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

I guess you're right. She's a little shy, so I don't want to come across as too aggressive. But one shouldn't be too little aggressive either.
I'll follow your advice next time

The language she is using makes her come across as sophisticated (Those posted here are translations), so I was planning to write something in the lines of: "Hey, I like your exotic combination of inserted phrases, semicolons and winks" and add something more to it.

What do you think?
These are SMS messages I already called her. She sounded a little nervous. Like most girls she's more flirty when she's texting.

Well, no worries.

Now, instead of saying that, why don't you go along the lines of, "I like the way you talk. It's a lot more woman, a lot less girl."

If she is sophisticated, she will like sophistication from your side too. Trust me. So, talk to her like you are James Bond himself and she'll love that. But, not all the time. Be a dork too, on some days. Women love depth in a man's character. They are fascinated by more and more sides a guy seems to display to them. It's a great way to keep them hooked for a long, long while.

So, good luck. And go forth, Sir. She's waiting.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

hey man

i was at a party and was grinding and kissing one girl. i got her number and the next day i txted er. i txted her with nothing special just: hey whatcha doing ...im doing my laundry ... sundays are so boring blablabla.

then she asked for my facebook where we procceded chatting. on facebook i started escalating in a very obvious way. i told her i was watching youtube videos. and there are alot of stuff u can learn from youtube. i wanted to learn how to massage then i just chatted around some massaging stuff. gave her links of massaging vidoes.

it was very obvious where this was going but she seemed to play along untill the end. she had never gotton a massage before and i wanted to give massage to learn so it was something like this.

me: OMG u are a massage virgin!! and i want 2 learn how to give massage dis is peeerfect

so i suggested to meet up but she flaked saying she was tired.

so i havent txt her since and tomorrow will be the sunday 1 week later and im planning on txting or fb. it is also possible that i will meet her tonight at a party?

what do you think ? thanks!

Well, while escalating is a good thing. Making it very obvious isn't.

It should look like the escalation is just happening naturally, almost of its own accord, even. Making it obvious, just makes things awkward and that's never a good place for anyone to be in.

Another mistake was calling her a "massage virgin" and that it was "peeeerfect", look she expects to be talking to a man, not a kid. Why are you behaving like one? With all those exclamations and dragging out the vowels, it's just a turn-off.

First things first, make your escalation less obvious, more stealthy. And try to type your messages in full, it's actually preferred by women, when they say a guy putting in the effort to type in full. Separates you from the crowd of the "Hey hw u doin" people.

And if you had to give her the massage invite ,you could've gone with "So you've never had one? I'm cracking my knuckles Maybe someday, I'll have under my 'magic hands' and you'll see what you are missing out on. " or something along those lines.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

ok thanks

but how should i now procced? what should i say when i text her today?

She still hasn't answered. Guess I pressed the wrong button.

Well, proceed with caution.

No, I mean it. She has already flaked on you once, now you need to have a completely different mindset so that she doesn't flake on you again.

Firstly, start off with normal conversation. Don't talk about sex, unless she brings that up. Just talk about usual things.. what's going on in her life, tell her what's going on in yours, something you read or saw, her views on some topic.. the usual. And maintain some distance, she will be kinda confused initially, because she has already assumed full interest from you. You should keep a slight formal stance in your messages.

Be a little indifferent to her. A little indifference goes a long way.

And you are welcome.

Keep me posted on how this goes.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Oh, I wouldn't worry about it that much.

Trust me, it just means that you have not built enough attraction yet. So, your next logical step should be to build it.

Let me tell you, you shouldn't give two craps about 1:1 send-reply ratio and all that non-sense. If you haven't heard from her, just call her out on it by saying, "Well, you are definitely hard to catch " and trust me she will reply.

She is a sophisticated woman and obviously works diligently, as she has already told you. She isn't lying, some women are actually very career oriented.

Now, treat that obstacle with due respect. Don't push her about it or act offended about that fact that she takes so much time to reply.

She's just working. Be respectful of that fact. And message her whenever you want. Just not over-the-top messaging. And start calling her more. She won't take days to reply over the phone, will she? Calling is always the preferred option over texting.

In the meantime, you should also keep your options open. Focusing your energy and time on one girl is rarely the smart option.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Hey Don Draper

Big fan of your advice. Maybe you can help with with an issue i'm having...

Met this girl a few months ago and we've always been very flirty with each other. However, due to logistics and our current situations at the time, we never really got to take it any further.

Well about a month ago, we started seeing each other more often...about 1-2 times per week. Since then, she would initiate conversations at least every day or so...she'd call me to see how i'm doing etc. So at this point, i'm thinking she's really into me. For the record, i haven't f-closed her yet, we've made out, but haven't been able to get her alone for the full close (she has a roommate and I live at home).

Anyway, over the past week or so, i've noticed that her texting behaviour has started to change. She still initiates texting, but doesn't continue the conversation! It's like she's pinging me...but when I respond, I don't get a response back! This has happened in the past 4-5 conversations. I've gotten her out in person once since then and her behaviour in person hasn't changed...she still acts very attracted. But it's like she's playing hard to get over text or something.
Because of this, i find myself now doing a lot of the initiating and chasing...and it sucks!

The other thing I should mention is that our text conversations aren't as interesting as they were when we first met. I would do a lot of teasing and funny/cocky stuff back then, but now it seems like we only text each other to meet up. At this point, we've known each other for a few months, have met up about 6 or 7 times already...so i figure using a lot of attraction material would be working backwards since i'm already deep into comfort.

Thoughts? Advice?

Hey Don

Great thread, I personally have found txt game to be the hardest part of the process with girls and it has cost me countless times.

I was txting a HB on Friday that I met on Thursday, the convo seemed to be going well then out of nowhere she stopped replying.

Really liked the idea of straight out, “Hey there! It's x tomorrow and I'd want to see you at lunch” approch which I feel it fits the frame I have with her but I wont be doing that till mid week, genuinely busy. If she texts tomorrow should I reply or freeze her out for at least 24hrs?

Yo Don.

So ive been texting this girl back and forth lately. But i started to realize that i was chasing her and i noticed that there was something different by the way she texts. So i stopped texting her since yesterday. Should i wait for her to text me, or should i wait another day or two and shoot her a text? Thanks in advance

Well, it shouldn't suck. It's just equilibrium, man. She initiated earlier, now you have to. It's as simple, just to keep the balance.

Don't worry so much about that. She wants to know that you are making an effort at the whole thing between you two and that's her way of checking that for herself, if you keep the "chasing" as you call it, she'll be impressed by your efforts and will actually believe in your words and that you just don't want to get into her pants like every other guy. It's a very important step to separate yourself from the rest. This is an opportunity for you to do so.

Well, there are always things to talk about.. trust me, suppose you saw something on the TV or while walking on the road and decided to tell her about it.. you could send a text. Or you read something and wanted to know her views on it, so you sent her a text.. you get my drift?

Another thing is "Why" not "What" strategy. Ask her the reasons behind her choices, it's very interesting to hear the thought process behind her reasoning and you can derive new conversation threads from there, as well as get a better idea of her inner workings.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Thanks, Ken. Just doing my bit.

Now, to your issue..

Well, don't worry about her not replying suddenly in between, it could be for a multitude of reasons. Now, you should initiate the conversation, if you want to.. because at this point the primary focus of your game should be on developing a level of comfort with her. Get it?

She should have you listed amongst her priorities. When that is done, she will always reply to your texts, because she just won't be able to ignore you in her mind. You'll be that important.

So, my advice would be to talk to her as much as you can, and not to worry about abrupt end of conversations.

There's a saying, "New day, New Beginnings." or "New Day, New Text Conversation."

Cheers.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "