Maybe not really a rant. I'm just pondering a lot of stuff.

Last night I went out with some folks from work. 2 of them were very attractive girls and I did my best to be the Alpha. It all started off fairly well. I tried my best to smile and appear to have a good time but as the night went on and I started having less of a good time, I think people could see right through it. One of the girls HB9 was driving me insane with her obnoxious immature party-girl attitude. She invited two guys she knows to join us. I definitely had an opportunity to maintain Alpha Male as I feel that my personality is stronger and more determined than any other guys with us that night, however I had no idea HOW to take control of the group, dictate where we would go and what we would do. We ended up following one of the dudes to his apartment a flashy posh "i have too much money" condo in downtown Manhattan. I realized the HB9 is a silly materialistic fool with the nicest breasts on the east coast. It's too bad a girl so gorgeous has such a terribly flawed personality. This girl is hit on absolutely everywhere that she goes, and so I know that part of the way she acts is due to her defensiveness against all the shitty dudes fawning over her, but does that account for all of her lousy personality?

I went out today to the mall and tried approaching some Hired Gun Store workers. A girl in A/X was very friendly and so I approached her and tried to use the jealous girlfriend opener. As soon as I started, I realized that I don't know the material. What resulted was a conversation that quickly died when there was a lot of potential. She was bored, HB7, she wanted to chat. I screwed it all up and then said goodbye. Now I know that if I'm going to do this and take it seriously, I need to learn the material and practice it with myself, with a friend, in the field.

I'm overcoming my Approach Anxiety, slowly but surely. I know girls want to talk, I know they want to meet someone, want sex as much as men do. I want to be that guy for them, but I have absolutely NO social proof and I often feel way too bored/sad/angry to smile and act happy. It's gonna take a lot of work for me to get this stuff right.

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-Murdoc

Yes, a lot of work, but that's normal. At least you are heading the right direction. You just have to keep working on the AA and talking to more and more girls. Really, the more girls you talk to, the easier it will get for you.

Don't worry, you're doing good work. Remember, routines exist to create conversation where there isn't any. If the girl is already chatty you don't need them, you're better off without them. Just let the conversation to flow naturally just remember to DHV and NEG occasionally.

A few tips for the snooty HB9- act aloof and indifferent towards her, you are not like all the other guys that hit on her. Bust on her for being materialistic and shallow (this always works on girls if you do it with a smile). Leave her better than you found her, you'll be twice the man if she becomes a better person after you.

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http://www.solomonseagal.com

Anyone can walk into a bar and pick up a random girl.
The trick is to make the experience unforgettable to her.
A real PUA will make every women he encounters feel like she experience something once in a lifetime.

As much as I want women/sex/a girlfriend/female friends/etc.. I do not wish to find myself validating my existence to women or validating my existence THROUGH women. I understand all the evolutionary mumbo jumbo and how it's hardwired into our genetic makeup to want as many women as possible and to want the hottest woman on Earth, but something must be said for trying so hard to get a woman that you're no longer even a shadow of the person you used to be.

Everywhere I go, and this has existed long before I found this PUA stuff, I'm always wondering will I find a girl? I want a girl, I need a girl, blah blah blah. We can train ourselves to appear non-needy, but in reality we are indeed needy. Needy for sex, needy for power, needy for validation. Taking this neediness that has been so natural for me for so long and combining it with an attempt at PUA lifestyle is proving to be a depressing mixture. I'm either depressed at how daunting the journey will be or depressed at each little failure along the way, or even depressed that I have to be taught how to be attractive because it's not natural to my personality.

I think the root of all this bullshit is the fact that I, and many of you guys, are seeking validation through the opposite sex. What do you guys think?

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-Murdoc

Don't get too hung up with being alpha and shit, if the other dudes were doing well holding court just enjoy yourself and immitate what they're doing. The best way to learn this stuff is to do the reading and then immitate naturals.

Also lots of girls are fucking annoying but try to maintain a positive attitude even if you do think they suck because negativity is easy to spot and will not only make you feel less like having a good time it'll also make you appear less attractive too.

Muscles and shit = Physical strength. Positivity = Emotional strength. Positivity is sexy. So try to tell your brain to shut the fuck up when it starts judging people too harshly.

http://www.bristollair.com/inner-game/i ... creed.html


That has helped me everytime. Before I go out I read it, It fires me up, I would definitely suggest it to you because it seems we have the same issues.

I personally don't go for canned material, which, as a result, makes things infinitely more difficult for me as I have to make up my own material on the fly, but I digress,

Check that out bro, read it, print it out, keep it in your back packet, it's the best 7 page read before you go sarging.

Good luck bro, eventually we will all break out of our shells and become the men we were meant to be.

-The Chef

well since you didnt know how to go about being the alpha male in the group and taking control of everything, what you should have done is went and opened sets all night long to work on your approach anxiety and raised your social proof with the girls... Girls see right through it when you're trying to fake having a good time, what they would have grown interested about is you being a social butterfly and talking to every other good lookin girl in the place but them...

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any Man can sweep any Woman off her feet, you just have to have the right broom...

Excellent point, Advice.

Murdoc, you're right in that a lot of men DO seek validation from the women, but normally it's the men that are insecure in themselves anyway. And, even that's a part of the growth process. The more confident you are in yourself, the less validation you need from anyone, regardless of if they are male or female.

that creed was pretty intense.

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-Murdoc

Yeah, I like it a lot, I especially have a problem coming off arrogant instead of confident...I have assholitis, hahaha.


But I read it everyday, and it's been helping me build a real strong frame. I am going out tonight actually.

Wish me luck!