I have some questions about Buddhism. I want to join its ranks. But I want to make sure this is the right decision for me. I'm not big into faith or spirituality, but I haven't done much lately. I want something to be apart of something bigger. I recently went through some things in life that made me want inner peace.

My parents are Christians and when I was younger I used to be Christian. But some of the principles of Christianity didn't suit my lifestyle. For one I support homosexuals, I believe in fairness for all people of all faiths, and believe there is nothing wrong with sex. My parents have tried to get me to attend church lots of times. It was actually this Sunday when my mom asked me to go that I considered Buddhism.

What should I consider before going to the Buddhist temple? Will race matter when I'm with the congregation? What will I have to give up in practicing this way of life?

A few of my concerns are:

1.) Buddhism also states that having lots of sex is wrong. It does teach a "middle path" but sex for pleasure is bad.

2.) Buddhism adheres to a very strict diet, vegetarian. I can't lie and say I don't like eating meat. I am open to giving up eating heavy red meats like beef or pork, chicken and Fish stays in my diet.

3.) Buddhism questions material wealth. I have never been the material type person. But being a business grad I was wondering if this was a contradiction to Buddhism. Would I have to give up on business?

4.) Buddhism does have a lot of theistic qualities. I am seeking a spiritual yet non-ritualistic way of life.

- Buddhism is much like its parent religion Hinduism in that it teaches reincarnation, karma, and morality.

- From what I understand western Buddhism tends to down play these spiritual qualities and tries to make Buddhism more pragmatic.

-However, the congregation that I would attend will be primarily Asian and they will practice the old world form of Buddhism.

Please correct me if I'm wrong in any of my concerns or assertions. I have turned to Buddhism because I can still be non-religious and spiritual at the same time.

Any thoughts?

Thanks a lot for this information. I'm sure it'll take me days if not weeks to comb through all of this stuff. I'll be going to the local Buddhist library this Sunday. I'm a little afraid I'll stick out like a sore thumb at the library because of my race, but I'm guessing a true and wise monk wouldn't turn away someone in need. I'll come through this stuff and find out what I like. Thanks. I'll put a lot of my spiritual journies and findings in this post. When I go this Sunday I'll document.

After trying many religions/beliefs throughout my life - including Catholicism, various Protestant Christian denominations, Atheism, LaVeyan Satanism, and Taoism - I eventually settled on Zen Buddhism and it's fucking great.

I don't attend temples. I've been to temples a few times but they just don't jive with me. I don't see the point in all the mantra chanting.

There's a Buddhist precept that says you shouldn't drink. They tell you not to fuck, they tell you not to eat meat, they tell you this and that... and then the Buddha says to questions everything.

All religions have seemingly contradicting advice from time to time, but one thing you'll have to learn to avoid is dogma. You don't need dogma to be religious. In fact, I believe that in order to be a Buddhist, you must not be dogmatic. Hell, Buddha said so.

As I learned more about Buddhism, a lot of things became clearer to me. One thing that I realized was that there were far more similarities between the teachings of Jesus and Buddhism... and probably of all the major religions... than there were differences. I absolutely urge you to look more into Buddhism, but you can still be Christian, go to church with your family, and still maintain your own personal beliefs while believing in the non-dogmatic fundamentals. That's not too different from me calling myself a Buddhist and still getting drunk off my ass on the weekend and having sex with a girl who has a boyfriend.

Religion is more of a personal journey than anything. You don't need congregation, although there are advantages to such gatherings. Just don't be dependent on them. Buddha wants you to think for your own damn self.

However, there is something that every Buddhist needs to practice on a regular basis, and that something is meditation. No matter what type of meditation you choose to practice (I do Zazen and Metta), you should do it even if its just for 5 minutes a day.

Thanks a lot, I'm more of going to the temple to get out of the house and do some stuff. I also want to experience Buddhism first hand; I believe it's best to go to a temple. And also I want to get a little guidance. I'm kind of lost in life and need a little direction. I figure some of the monks can give me a little direction. I know I can't depend on them solely.
I've been atheist for the last 7-8 years. My parents are Christian. They have been trying to get me to go to Church. I'm not a big fan of modern Christianity. I've heard that original Christianity actually took a lot of principles from Hinduism, Buddhism, and Zoroastrianism.
I actually don't drink much, and I'm not a big fan of heavy red meats. Diabetes, alcoholism, and blood disease runs heavy in my family. I drink a glass of red wine with dinner and eat a piece of dark chocolate on the side maybe 2 or 3 times a week. When I go to a party or a special event I’ll have like 1 beer. I usually never allow it to go past 2. But these are all personal dietary choices.
I'm honestly pursuing Buddhism until I can create my own personal spiritual substitute. I like a lot of the principles behind Buddhism and I intend to further unravel them. I plan on taking the stuff I like from most religions and mashing them together to form my own new personal religion . I still want to be atheist but I want to be spiritual and Buddhism allow for me to do this.

I am actually making up something I do in the mornings that involves meditation. I have been trying to come up with this for a while now. I might spend like 30 min. – 1 hr. doing things that help me to calm down and relax, meditation being apart of that.

I was also thinking of starting a journal and dividing journals into different types:

1.) Objective Field Journals: Strictly for when I go out into the field, and I’ll leave my emotions out of it.

2.) Emotional Journal: help me to channel and release my emotions about life.

3.) Goal based journaling: Keeping track of success in my personal health and or life goals. This excludes anything social or dealing with PU.

I haven’t quite come up with what I want to do but I’ll come up with something quick and easy tonight. Again thanks for the advice, I’ll definitely document about things when I go to the temple. My real objective is to go to the mall near by with my mom’s car . Weekends or evenings are the only real time I have the car, but I want a real reason to get out the house and not just go out to hit on girls.
Anyways I talk my self up for hours, thanks a lot man.

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The Masturbation Federation

First off I would like to apologize for all the dumb questions I forgot that Hobbit gave me a wealth of information. I haven't looked at anything yet and that could be why I was asking all these questions.

Secondly, I did my first meditation today and it hurt!! I folded my legs like I saw them do on the movies and that is not comfortable. I think I might be doing it completely wrong. My back hurts and my inner thighs radiate with pain. It's hard to relax when I’m in so much pain .

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The Masturbation Federation

Went to the Buddhist library it wasn't a great or enjoyable experience. I felt very weird the whole time, a lot of old Asian people. And I tried not to be rude or take any food but they insisted. I felt very weird and strange, and I think I've been watching too many Buddhist movies. I thought it would be like some old wise monks there giving advice and stuff. It was nothing like that, very ritualistic, and very redundant. I found that going to the library is actually much like going to church. I find most of the good teachings of Buddhism is buried and drowned in useless superstition. I live very far from the city so I don't know if I will be able to find a temple capable of hosting a non-religious western version of Buddhism.

Overall, they were nice, and gave me food and books but I did not feel very welcome. I also am very afraid to go back. I felt like I was invading their cultural space.

I would like to add that I love concepts of Buddhism like I think most people do and I think once I have the time I will create my own belief system combined with the best and most useful tendencies of all major or essential religions. All the other junk is going to be thrown away. I think I am going to create a congregation like this in my own culture. Might be a bit better and more comfortable.

It wasn't Zen Buddhism though so I might have to try a Zen Buddhist temple before I give up on going to a temple and being a part of a congregation.

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The Masturbation Federation

I know Hobbit but I could tell some of the people didn't want me to be there and a lot of the doctrines reminded me of going to Sunday school. I'm not going back next week but I will go the week after to give it another shot. They are having a very long festival next week and unfortunately I can't make that. I'm actually doing some important stuff now. I was apprehensive, and maybe I am being the judgmental one.

They were nice and gave me food, but it felt very weird being the only black person there. Even if there were a few white people I would've felt a bit more comfortable, but it was only old Asians. Please forgive me if I sound fearful and stubborn. I just have not had many good experiences with older Asian people. I tend to try and stay out of Asian peoples' way. Not that I have anything against them, it’s just I can sense the tension.

One guy was nice and translated the teachings to me while the main person spoke. It was mostly about karmas and getting into the pure lands or the peripheral lands to the pure lands. I'm all for the, you get what you seek principle, but the whole experience put me at ease.

But just now I did in fact notice my own fear and bigotry, but I can't lie and say that seeing a few other black people would've made my heart stop pumping so fast. I will go in two weeks in order learn more before I just throw everything away. I will bring food as is customary for such events, and I will meditate on this and see what I should do. My heart feels very uneasy about this whole situation. But I am only studying Buddhism.

I would like to take these ideas and put them in my own neighborhoods and hopefully get some black people to abandon the failed practice of the urban corner store church. I know one thing I didn’t like about going to church is how my old pastors used to attack ideas and be so ignorant about them at the same time. They would attack homosexuals, atheists, and even Buddhism and not truly understand what it was about. They would “educate” the congregation about what they perceived these things to be. They never once took the time to understand any of these other cultures or what they have to offer.

And I think that I am doing the same. I am being biased because of their race. But how can my heart come to ease and peace with this situation Hobbit? A good man does not lie about his fear or anxiety, a good man is honest with himself.

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The Masturbation Federation

I've been meditating for a little close to a week now. I still feel bad and it still feels very hard to talk to people. I have reached out and tried my best so far. I have a few personal things going on in life that is making things kind of hard for me. I take deep breaths every time I'm frustrated.

I need to work on my self-confidence a bit, and learn not to give up so easy. I look in the mirror every morning. I tend to still avoid people. I have a long way to go...

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The Masturbation Federation

If your making that your goal then you're probably seeing yourself as not succeeding, which is a negative thought process.

You should drop the goals all together, and just be, that way you can't lose.

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My PUA Journey from AFC to PUA

Thanks Hobbit, I've received your email and I am working my way through this.

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The Masturbation Federation