"I'm not having sex with you"



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A Sticking Point or SP is an issue you CONSISTENTLY run into.

It is NOT a point where you get stuck with ONE SPECIFIC GIRL.

A Sticking Point is:
Quote:
I keep getting LMR whenever I bring girls back to my place. This has happened at least 10 times already! What am I doing wrong?
A Sticking Point is NOT:
Quote:
I got LMR with this one girl! What do I do?
IT IS AGAINST THIS BOARD'S RULES TO POST THREADS ABOUT JUST ONE GIRL
If you have not already gone out and practiced enough to have a real Sticking Point from meeting an ABUNDANCE of women, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO POST HERE.



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PostPosted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 1:14 pm 
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OMG. the last two girls i have almost got with have told me they are NOT having sex with me on that night. :x I remember reading somewhere that that means they want to have sex but dont want to be a slut or something but i cant remember how to flip that and get sex :? :?

occasion 1: I went to this girl i met on a holiday's grandma's house with her on a saturday night. we went to grab a bite to eat and some groceries and went back to the grandma's. Plenty of sexual tension + attraction building.
When grandma went to bed we started making out and i started undressing her a little and had her topless but then she wouldnt take off her pants!! like no fingering or anything
I didnt push myself on her or anything and didnt get anything (maybe could have if i tried but i thought it would seem desparate or AFC) so we just made out topless for a couple of hours (what do u guys do after you get tired of making out) then i went home. meeting up with her again on thursday. (shes a school girl im in uni)

occasion 2: went for a ride with a girl i've been flirting with HEAPS and there is heaps of sexual tension but this is the 1st time we have met up in like 3months!
anyway we went to a carpark and were just talking with heaps of tension and i just leaned over and kissed her (she was in the drivers seat) and pulled back and she pretty much said then and there im not having sex with you.
i was like yeah ok whatever and we started making out and i started fingering her while she was sitting and i told her to get undressed cos her undies were on which was making life difficult lol. in no time shes naked and moaning in pleasure as i lick her out and finger her.
Then we make out with her on top of me naked and im fully clothed and i start to undress and she starts giving me a wristy but then she still said we are not having sex dispite her saying she wanted to and that i wanted to :(

Anyway can anyone see a solution to my problemo's? it could be a coincidence but i dont know. . .


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 4:21 pm 
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Yes. That means that they want to have sex with you, but they don't want to look like sluts.
Solution is to control her frame.

Read about that on google. It realy helps.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 6:12 pm 
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as far as what I read maybe you "it's all happening fast". Their resistance is caused by the speed. try slowing down and chill. you know you can get laid... just don't be quick about it.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 3:46 am 
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Control her frame?

is that like me pretending that I dont want to have sex with them? like saying "oh shit you thought i wanted sex? i just wanted to hang"

any other suggestions? [/i]


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 8:13 am 
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Quote:
Control her frame?

is that like me pretending that I dont want to have sex with them? like saying "oh shit you thought i wanted sex? i just wanted to hang"

any other suggestions? [/i]
Something like that...

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 10:06 am 
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Quote:
Control her frame?

is that like me pretending that I dont want to have sex with them? like saying "oh shit you thought i wanted sex? i just wanted to hang"

any other suggestions? [/i]
that re-frame will be counter productive to your pickup, DURR YOU THOUGHT I WANTED SEX, NAH I JUST WANTED TO... UH GO TO MY HOUSE

this is just token resistance, by control her frame, he meant, be in frame control, as in you set the frames to the interaction, your in a constant battle with a girl over what the underlying meaning of your interaction with her is, (but in this situation you were dealing with LMR and frame control has little to do with a solution for you but here are some instances at a bar were it would be important)

here are some re-frames for you, on Im not having sex with you,

OK, we will see, (im very charming*optional*), lets go to my house and (non sexual activity),

well not yet, anyways, (change subject go for pull later)

those are the fixes i use for the resistance at bars/club pre-isolations

from your post, you were just dealing with LMR, ABSOLUTELY EVERY FUCKING THING LMR related, can be dealt with by agreeing, EVERY SINGLE THING, we are not having sex = OK (continue making out physically escalating), just lead her into it, (bend over i want inside you) NEXT THING IS NO,STOP,DON'T you hear one of those, you freeze her out, you don't continue making out content with that, you stop what you are doing, DO NOT FUCKING ACT ANGRY, this is wrong, IF SHE SENSES A HINT OF RESENTMENT OR ANGER OR FEELS THIS IS SOME SORT OF REACTION YOU ARE FINISHED, GAME OVER, your going for the *sweet guy vibe* its ok, don't worry, lets just (insert non sexual activity here) we don't have to rush things, i just want to spend time with you (she will try to re-initiate makeout/foreplay, because she is horny this is where you fucked up in car) if you are not logistically in a place where you can have sex and perform a freeze out, your logistics are flawed, anyways after freeze out when she is trying to re-initiate foreplay (only start foreplay when logistics are correct) you ask her to pass the barrier you are stuck at (if your at bra, say ok only if you take off your bra, if your at panties, ok, but take off your panties, your at penatrion, ok only if you let me inside you), you may have to freeze out multiple times, if you require more then 4 then it is probably more wise to just not have sex at that time and try again later,

MAKE SURE YOU ARE NOT REACTIVE IN ANYWAY, IT IS NOT A BIG DEAL TO YOU AT ALL,


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 3:50 pm 
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pumpington that sounds like a perfect remedy to the problem :)

just curious, what style do you use to pick girls up? i like reading peoples routines/lines/ styles if you could link me anywhere?


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 9:16 am 
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I would also recommend not licking the pussy in order to "get her in the mood". Doing that to a chick who you are trying to bang, in many cases can ruin your chances. Also, a lot of women (sexually experienced ones) consider it kinda needy for a guy to be so quick to bury his face down there. Save that for when she is actually your girlfriend.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 1:21 pm 
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Quote:
pumpington that sounds like a perfect remedy to the problem :)

just curious, what style do you use to pick girls up? i like reading peoples routines/lines/ styles if you could link me anywhere?
my own style, really depends on mood, at this point i just hit on girls


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2011 2:29 am 
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lol I had a chick butt ass naked, eating her out/fingering her and then once I was about to stick it in she was like, "NO were not having sex!" Then I was like, "hey I understand that you think i wont call you in the mornin, but lets definitely get to know each other a bit after tonight and not have you think I'm just usin you for sex". That didn't work and I never called the girl again because I was annoyed that I didn't get anything out of it except for pussy taste in my mouth and my finger smelling a tad funny. She can go screw herself lol.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:39 pm 
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What would Mystery say? :p ... "I understand, let's play chess". ;)


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 12:11 am 
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in this case, you have got to remove the last few barriers that are stopping the girl having sex with you, through getting to know her you will realise what these are, counter these and make her not worry about them and she will lose all resistance


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 03, 2011 8:34 am 
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When they say I dont want to have sex with you you tell them - "hang on who said I would let you any way"
Get close to haveing sex and if they say you should not then tell them that is fine and give them a hug. in a small amount of time they will trust you more and it will happen.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 12:46 pm 
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I cant be the only one who suppresses a smile and secretly laughs inwards everytime I hear this :P


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