So a few days back i met this girl at work and i asked her to come get some cake with me. When we got there we both decided on one and she didn't even reach for her purse just waited for me to pay. Is it customary for a guy to pay bearing in mind it was I that asked her and it was the first time?

Tomorrow i made the mistake of inviting her for pizza (i know, should have said a drink or w/e). Which i don't plan on paying for her because it's pretty expensive for a first real date so how could i hint to her paying for hers or at least half of it ? Also, if we go out for some inexpensive drink should i pay for say the first 2-3 dates ?

Thanks in advance.

Depends on the situation.

For instance, I was dating this girl, who doesn't make alot of money but insists on paying her cut on a date. I on the other hand have a decent salary, so I could easily afford to pay. I don't mind to pay abit more in this situation.

But, if a girl expects me to pay for it, I'm not paying everything, 50/50 sounds fair then

Its all about the intention

I've actually used this as an opener before. Basically it comes down to upbringing. Certain girls are taught the guy must pay and will therefore not even offer (rude!!!). There are various ways you can deal with this. Before you even go on the date, or for drinks etc, qualify her by saying 'I hate rude girls that dont even offer to pay for meals on dates. Its like I am paying for their company, isnt that what escorts are for? You're not like that are you?'. Now when you go on the date, at least she will offer (even if very insincere). Advice given to me on Adams Bootcamp that i loved was as the bill arrives, and you 'fight' about who pays, you grab the bill and say 'i'll get this one and I PROMISE we can share the next one.' This is gold as 1) you are being gentlemanly and paying and 2) you have planted the seed of another date in her head hope this helps

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It is gentlemen like to pay for the bill. You become used/a pushover if you pay for EVERYTHING.

Keep that in mind. For me, I like to mix things up. Sometimes I'll pay, sometimes we'll share the bill, and sometimes she'll pay for me.

Omg! nothing wrong with paying. Your inviting her out. From experience, is better to pay then split the bill or have her pay. 'Just don't take her to a fancy place where is gonna cost you tons of money.

My bill is usually less then 40 $, which is no big deal. Also, if your a cool guy, is not like paying on your date is gonna mess anything up.

what i do is i'd offer to pay for dinner, and then i'd suggest we head over to a bar and i'd make her buy a couple of rounds of drinks. this way i don't pay for EVERYTHING, yet retain the gentlemanly gesture that so many girls are disillusioned with sometimes, we get to have a fun night out, and she gets a little tipsy. kills many birds with one stone.

Agreed with above. If you have multiple payment situations, its a lot easier to deal with things. I went on a date where I took the girl to dinner, paid the cab fare, split dinner, and she bought a round of drinks afterwards. it may not have been a perfect split, but the money isnt the issue. Its the division of power. We may buy our own tickets to the movie, but I will buy the bottle for us to share at my apartment afterwards. It depends on the girl and the situation. Sometimes I'm not paying for anything I'm not eating, drinking, consuming etc myself.

You invite a girl out.. be prepared to pay... unless you set it as a casual thing..


but if you are takin her out.. its on you..

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