This hasn't exactly happened to me before, but I'm pretty sure I will come across it sooner or later, and I would like to be prepared if I am in that situation.


Imagine you and 2 of your good guy friends are at a bar. You and your friends have some drinks and do some approaches to a few of sets of girls here and there, do well, but don't go home with them. Later in the night, you guys are able to approach a set of 3-5 girls, get them interested, and you all sit with them and have fun. One of your friends is obviously the alpha male, considering the nature of his stories and the way he talks, and is able to get the girls interested in his story. As some time passes by, you know you haven't gotten as much attention since you are not the alpha male. It's not 100% that you cannot get any of the girls, but obviously, you're not as dominant as your friend. The other friend is in about the same situation, but it's possible he showed a little more or little less dominance than you.


When I'm talking about dominance, I'm talking about the way you speak, stories you have shared, and responses you've given.


I'm trying to portray an image that I have while writing this, and I hope I got the message across. What would you do in this situation? Does it really matter that you are not as dominant, considering that only one, maybe 2 girls are marking the alpha male as hers/theirs?

Kill or get killed. Educate yourself, become the dominant one! Why should she pick you when you are not the better one? Instead of accepting your situation, improve your qualities.

Learn to speak & lead, both conversation and movements of the group itself. Be the alpha or go home jerk off. There is no excuse to be beta. You have access to internet. Read, watch, learn, apply. Watch Tom Cruise, study Brad pit, how they look, move, gesture, memorize 10 intresting stories, learn cocky funny jokes,..dude, its year 2011. you know what u want, go get it, u got the tools and u can. News for u bro, if u dont get her, I will.

Lol Of course I will try to be the alpha male in the group, but there will be times for most guys to come across this. I am saying imagine you did your best to be the alpha male, yet you are in that situation. Imagine that you are mid way through interacting with these girls, and you can tell you're not the alpha male. What would you do? DHL your good friend so you can say "hoes before bros"? Accept it and hope for the best? Etc.

If this has happened to you, what did you do?

If those two guys are your friends, then its worth trying to do something other than defaulting to the PUA cult reaction. First off you dont usually want to work in tandem like that anyways, for that very reason you mention unless you have a plan. Even if its as simple as drawing straws or playing janken beforehand, if yyou know who is taking the lead with a set it makes life simpler. If one guy is really stepping out of line even if he isnt establisehd as "the guy," your better off just walking to the bar for a beer. If you just start AMOGing eachother the whole nights a lost cause, and friendship is worth trying to preserve. The guys that tell you to drop any dude who can act more alpha than you, well they aren't inviting you out with them, are they?

I've had it happen to me, and I bring it up with the guys the next day. I've never had a serious issue where a friend repeats that behavior. You gotta talk about it. And hey, if there's three of you, and two of you walk away because the third isnt spreading the love, I think those girls will get the message. But its always better to just sort things out beforehand. At teh end of the day, its actually really hard for 3 guys to run a 3 set successfully unless you rotate. I say rotate as in, one guy approaches, brings the other two in while he walks away for a while, and you keep going back and forth so the actual time spent with all of you there is fairly small.

Lol these responses are good because it tells me I have to refine the scenario since I'm doing a bad job on my description.

I'm not saying he's overstepping boundaries. He of course allows you to talk and doesn't cut you off. It's just that he seems more like that alpha male in the group considering his charms, looks and responses. And how about a bigger set, not just 3? Like 4-5 girls. In my head, it's a pretty big booth, and all 7-8 of you can sit in there at once. One of you approached, and the other two joined in afterward.

First, learn how to be alpha, it takes a long time, but it will take your game up to whole new level.

Second, you and your friends need to learn how to wing properly. This will make a huge difference. There is lots on winging out there, so look it up.

Third, develop your skills to a point where you can game sets without any wings. Is hard to learn. I came out off a point, where I could not hold down a set a for more then 2 minutes.

Right now, I am at a point where I hate having wings. If my wingman wants to wing me, I prefer him to leave me alone for at least 10 minutes.

Lemme reiterate my point in a way that hopefully is simpler. When you wing, you aren't trying to game. Winging and gaming are two different acts. When more than one guy is gaming, that leads to AMOGing which is bad. In your scenario, you aren't running a 5 set with your friends. You are just socializing with the group, and running a set on one girl while your friend is running a separate set with another girl and your second friend is running a 2 set. They are separate interactions, but of course you are all inelligent people who can go back and forth between talking to eachother and the set.

Lol I guess I was worrying about it for nothing. What you said is basically what I was thinking; just socializing, not gaming.

Well your concern is valid. That situation you described does occur, but I explained why it happens. All of you need to know the difference between socializing and gaming, be on the same page, or issues occur. But since you are friends, there's no problem in talking about it and having a general game plan beforehand.

Though I think my point's been pretty well stated. I'll put my 2 cents in as well.

When you're out with your friends, if you're not the most alpha guy in your group doesn't ruin your chances with girls when you guys approach large sets.

As mentioned before you can have the group pretty well divided up with everyone. The guy who opens can figure out his target. You all get to be social, and there are several things you can do in social settings that spark attraction.

I've found using gambler's multi-level communication can be useful to game a chick while I'm hanging out with my friends. (though I've only tried it a few times I've had good responses so far)

Just because you aren't the guy who appears to be running everything doesn't dash your chances to give girls the vibe that you're confident, social, and sexual.

Alpha male:

- Stand out
- Hand gestures
- Smile
- Talk loud and clear
- Make your presence the biggest in the group
- Kino
- Insert C&F jokes/jokes about other males
- Lead, when you decide something the rest should follow.

Lol I sort of know how to be an alpha male, but sometimes it doesn't go your way. Thanks for all the tips on that though.

Clearly you don't, or you're doing it wrong else you wouldn't have started this topic in the first place. If you show your dominance and let your presence be known than there's no man who can take the leadership from you.

do what you want,
dont care what people think,

to simplify it, this is all you need to accomplish

Well, if you friend is being one type of Alpha then you project the other.

i.e. for a loud, brash Alpha become the silent, strong Alpha.

It's a stupid concept that there's always one Alpha in every group. Plus, women will love the differences between the both of you. Win-Win situation for both.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "