lately on this forum im seeing questions which are .. well lets say - too simple. Guys asking how to approach woman or how to game woman through text game.

Lately im just shaking my head when im on the forum.... i hear questions like : '' what is wrong with my approach '' and then some guy gives advice about working on his body language.

now there is nothing wrong with body language but do you really think body language works that much ? if you are a chode with good body language you are still a chode with - good body language. Is body language important ? yes it is ... is body language VERY important ? no .....

body language never saved a relationship ... i actually have to admit i almost never used proper body language and still managed to have succes. The only point at which you have to use mad body language is when you are fucking her in your bed. I mean cmon guys , everytime you suck with woman you are just screwing up yourself - everytime you cannot succeed with woman it's just a symptom of a underlying issue.

Everytime you feel so called ''approach anxiety '' everytime woman give you a'' wtf do you want look - and you really care about it '' it's just a symptom of your issues. So why focus on external shit ? why focus on how to impress her with good body language and that shit ? You guys think '' how can i pickup woman ?'' you guys should think ''how can i be good with myself ''?

it's so obvious... if you suck with woman you suck at being a man .. period .. do you really think men are designed to get rejected ? do you think men are designed to fail ? do you see other animals having so called approach anxiety or issues ? I NEVER HAVE SEEN an animal sucking at pickup.. all animals are being male-animals.

So where do you suck ? what is preventing you from accessing your nature and being a mature man ? why don't you go after what you want in the right and proper way ? There is nothing wrong with asking questions and you need to start somewhere right ? but if a 40 year old guy asks me about how to approach chicks then he's not being a mature man.

it should be the other way around .. im 23 and those 40 year olds should learn me all their treasured knowledge but instead im encountering 40 year old chodes who are trying to impress 18 year old woman with PUA skills and who need advice.... don't you agree it's really a headshaker ?

evertime i need to give someone advice it's just because they aren't being a mature men. All people who need help have many things in common .. they all ask the same questions - they all fail on the same aspect of social interaction and they all want to learn some power which makes them better with woman. Guess what jumbo ? all these techniques are actually messing you up . all the body language you learn is useless .... woman read unconcious social cues and if you use body language language instead of being yourself she will notice.

woman are emotional creatures right ? they all respond to emotions ... guess what when you are using pua tactics and skills you are cutting of the emotional interaction - you will be totally out of the moment. If you are not a mature man it's probably because you cannot handle your emotions...

woman tend to run away from :

1. men who do not have control over their emotions
2. men who do not show their real emotions

if you fail at 2 you suck at 1 and if you suck at 1 you will fail....everytime you use that routine you are not interacting with emotion. with emotions i don't mean crying and begging her to fuck you while unzipping your pants. i mean you communicate you being what you are and owning what you are - a man -.

1 and 2 are both symptoms of people who suffered from developmental arrest and who are not mature man but more like boyish figures. IF you are really good at PU but you failed in many relationships it's because you failed to understand her emotions ... you were thinking you understand her but in reality you cannot really think how someone feels.

how you feel is communicated through emotions...not through mental images of what you should do, everytime you use a learned PU skill you are just trying to control the way she feels.

ask yourself this ? is this a interaction ? if you were a woman - do you want to have a relationship with someone who does not understand emotional relevance ? The conclusion i see is that most guys are still that 12 year old kid in some aspects... just pay some attention to yourself before you pay attention to others. Why do you go to the forum anyway .. why don't you just trust yourself and let nature takes it course ...

i have never encountered someone who did not knew about PU and who sucked ... you want to learn something right ? What do you want to learn ? ask yourself and find out what is more important to learn. Are woman that fucking special or important ? are they nice and are they fun ? yes they are

do you need them ?

no you do not need them ...... you probably think you need them

well stop thinking and ask yourself how you feel .. do you need woman or do you need to be more yourself and in touch with yourself. just sense what you are feeling when you are thinking about this.

don't do the thing that you want to do because you need it
do the thing which you feel is right

if you are not having the proper emotions when it comes to meeting woman , if you are thinking or overanalyzing you are probably missing the problem - and the chance is high it's right in front of your nose. before you get in touch with your emotions you need to experience them ... you cannot know low temperatures untill you have felt it. so first you need to experience emotions then you can transform them into willpower and other productive behaviours.

if you think understand this all you are probably missing the point ... you are again trying to learn and not really being in touch with yourself.
if you are confused you are probably on the right track

_________________
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Too much negativity. U fail at teaching, learn to teach.

Good post, Lode, I couldn't agree more. Unfortunately, being a man is the hardest thing to be, no amount of techniques can make up for that. I wish I learned how to be a "man" earlier in my life, but we learn while we live and it's never too late.

_________________
rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

a lot of good points in there.

i actually agree with virtually everything he said.

with one exception.

studying p.u. is good if the tactics/techniques you learn aren't something that you practice and act out in a false way, but actually through reading the stories and information and integrating it into your TRUE personality.

basically, using p.u. to learn to become a better social person through other people's shared experiences.

i think if you us p.u. to learn magic spells that will make all women fall all over you, but you are just "acting", then you have missed the point.

it's about growing as a person.

and all people need guidance (at some point, and in varying amounts) in their lives to grow.

_________________
what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

GREAT POST

You make so many good points. I see lots of one-itis posts in General just in the short time I've been here. People have to reclaim their cajones from these women and be real men. Even in some of my posts you've helped me see the errors in my thinking which are not always obvious to me. Good things all around, you do great work here.

Dude, this is awesome. I loved it 10/10

I think this is more a question of "my approach fails because it sucks by itself or because i suck? and the body language answer comes sometimes for a lack a proper answer

I cant agree with you there, no matter how good with yourself you are, you gonna get "the WTF do you want" look from time to time or get rejected there isnt %100 rate of success
Actually males in the animal kingdom are rejected they dont pass their genes and die, thats how nature work. Besides thats the downside of rational thinking
i dont get your point, why is bad a 40 year old ask you advice?
ok YOU are good with women, some men are not, some men want to do something about it, some men develop social skill some dont. Maybe that 40 year old guy dont know about women but beats you in lets say enginering.
Being older is not a sign of being good at everything.
I agree, its nice to think of the magic solution but one has to suck it up and just try

What this means? seriously dont mean to offend but throwing vague terms like that is just the same like those people who respond "inner game" when someone throws a question, it would be interesting in what you mean by that
I get your point but 2 things, why are you here them? and why cant you consider the fact that there are people who just arent good at being social?
Never? seriously you never EVER found a person who is bad with women and didnt know pua....... thats very very very weird, or maybe in your country puas is as mainstream as pepsi? Seriously i dont know how mainstream pua is in your country heres is barelly known
Sorry it just sounds to me like cheap pop psychology, i dont want to troll or anything but it kinda confuses me, i would really like to hear an deep explanation of what you mean

kinda right


What are proper emotions ?

for one i understand your point about people trying to find here the magic pill to their problems or just expect to fill themselves with routines to become robots but i honestly think there are people who just suck at one aspect and they just want to improve, is that so bad? Are they less because they ask help because of one aspect that they are clueless?
Maybe they dont know how to be sociable or maybe they kinda are but they fell they need to improve or even have fear of escalating.
I dont see why they cant go to a place and ask for help.

You've got the what and a little bit of the why. The "HOW" portion is a bit difficult.

Having better body language is better than having shitty BL. All else equal, you should try to have good body language. Plus, a lot of the times, you fake it to make it. Cause and Effect of body language: having good body language actually makes you a more confident person.
Really? I would say the majority of "men" suck with women. So what now? Being a "man" is now suddenly an esoteric club of distinguished magicians? Seriously, your comment is packed with arrogance. I know a lot of guys who are super successful, confident, fun, alpha, but are shy around women because they have not the experience. So these people are automatically effeminate failures?
Not being mature? I bet there are people younger than you out there who have better game than you whom you could learn from. Does that make you immature? No? Why not? Because even though you're not the best PUA, you're still better than most? Well, where is the cut off line? How much "game" does one need to be mature?
I have a hard time weaving through your language. It sounds like your post pretty much revolves around not being too focused on canned material and instead focus on inner game/ being yourself. I do agree that people need to be themselves. But I fail to see how using canned material and asking about specific PUA skills is incompatible with the former. You should always be yourself and focus on yourself, but there a proper way to channel your emotions and an improper way to do that. PU are methods to channel your emotions and energy in a productive manner. The point of learning pick up is to internalize the method so you can focus on the emotional sincerity more efficiently.

Overall, I would say the gist of your post makes sense, but honestly there is a lot of arrogant and useless baggage that honestly will help very few people out there. For a thread directed to the "noobs", this is a failure on your part as a leader of the forum. You're trying to teach your audience more than they can handle. This thread probably will end up hurting more people than helping them.

They ask these questions because ultimately they are looking for a quick fix or magic pill. It's very hard and time consuming to look deep down and find/fix your core problems.

Unfortunately... the community seems to be filled with lines, tactics, and "quick fixes" instead of real deep understanding of inner game. Most of the people here.... you can give them all of the lines in the world but they still won't get laid.

I guess maybe it's just a process we all need to go through.

When did women become the ultimate goal of life?

All I got from this was that you're frustrated and ranting.

Will it serve a purpose? Not hugely.

But, it might have cleared your head,so.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

He's saying what's been said so many times before, turn the sentence around and obvious becomes obvious.


As for the original post goes, I personally agree on some points, but the balance between "man up and stfu" and people opening threads for every single sentence they did in an approach and then asking "how did I do?" needs to be established on any online pua community.

There are a lot of good points in the OP, but the delivery was terrible.

Think phsyical trainer. If Joe Blow fatass walks into a gym and Seargent Pyle tells him he looks like a fat bag of dicks that no woman on earth would touch with a ten foot pole unless he drops and does 10,000,000 pushups, Joe blow will just walk out.

The reason people stay in basic camp is because they *signed up*. The biggest loser works because people *make money*. They are individually emotionally invested to succeed. That's the difference between someone who pushes themselves to be a good PUA and someone who posts retarded questions that show they clearly ignored everyones advice and didn't actually read any PUA material.

So is the right way to deal with those people to tell them they suck complete ass and are a waste of testosterone? prob not, at least if you want them to get better.

It's like telling a depressed person they are depressed. They are fully aware they feel like shit, and reinforcing it just make them want to slice their wrists.

I think a better approach is reinforcing WHY the things that work actually work, and reitterating that people need to actually follow advice and read material if they want to see results. If you are just sick of answering stupid questions, just stop answering stupid questions, instead of ranting about it.

_________________
"Would it be wrong to join sexaholics anonymous to pick-up chicks?" "...yes, and stop eating that baby."

-Psych3r-

agreed + 1 ... i want to gove the how later on

hako
advice from someone who doesn't see the real problem...but i do agree with your point as well.
notice the : '' and you care about it ''... getting the look isn't the problem , creating mental illusions from your insecurities or limiting beliefs is - again it's something immature to care what strangers think of you. i don't even want to get into genetics ... im discouraged by the topic of genetics alone because it's too simple to grab objective biology - i rather focus on behaviours. Alot of introverted people became / become succesfull in many ways - are they introverted by learned behaviour or are they born that way ? i don't know... it's hard to find out and again it's too theoretic. it's not about memorizing knowledge and become good at it like remembering latin names for muscles and so forth....im talking about being a mature men, it's not only a common process but also a very individual process since everyone has a variety of personality. Actually knowledge is the problem... men are designed to go after woman and somehow some people create limiting beliefs which are totally immature to repress their true nature....

if you are 40 years old i expect you to be a mature men without any negative self images... it's about controlling your emotions in a positive way and i see too many older people failing at it. Not having control over your emotions is just a immature aspect ... it's boyish behaviour. some people suffered developmental arrest when they are 15 and now they are 40 and still perform the same behaviour without any awareness of the consequences. do i expect people to posses crazy mathematical skills .. ? no .... do i expect a 40 year old man to have emotional mature behaviour ? yes i do. can you be a a bit more specific ? that's the whole point .. there are no people who aren't social ... your nature is to be social because that is how humans are evolved - it's something natural and it's proven by science. Every guy wants to have a girlfriend or at least has the natural urge to have one. They aren't social because they think they aren't social - they are repressing their whole human aspect.
Emotions and Nature have to be aligned otherwise you will create your own issues.

the reason why i joined this forum is because i wasn't social either ...i had build a glass wall around me and i didn't even notice. now im social because im aligned with my nature - i don't have to feel any negative thoughts or excuses about being social. Not being social is learned behaviour .. being social is a natural thing.
so my whole point is .. everyone is social , they are just building their own glass walls, accept who you are period. maybe i communicated this the wrong way ... if you are in touch with your nature and emotions getting good with woman will handle itself , i've seen guys who didn't knew anything about pua , they were just in touch with themselfs - spiritualy , fincancially and emotionally and were solid confident people without being assholes. they were good with woman naturally .. guess what everyone is good with woman naturally - the question is why are you repressing that ? every guy who can't talk with woman or feels emotional blocks when doing so has some immature aspects in his boundaries. what is the difference between communicating with woman anyway .. men are woman are both human. it still confuses me as well .. im going to explain very soon. What are proper emotions are ? going to explain that as well...

Khrem
what if you believed 100 % that your body language is the coolest shit even tho it's not ''proper'' body language ? is it the body language ? or the idea that proper body language gives you confidence ? anyway i still agree that good body language it's better than having bad body language - better for your physical health as well. i have seen very cool guys with shitty body language hooking up with ''hot'' woman , just like i've seen ''ugly guys'' hooking up with hot high status woman....

fake it untill you make it ... this is my whole point .. why fake it ? what do you need to fake ? your shortcomings when it comes to interacting with other woman/people ? why do you believe that learning body language or any routine will disolve your inner / psychological issue ? any technique you will learn will bring you further from facing your problems - it's only covers it up.... if your journey starts with PU and method like MM it's ok - eventually you will develop and get more mature along the way.... im not saying what's good or bad im just pointing something out.
if you can't be normal and chill around woman then there is work to be done ... don't you agree ? what is experience ? is it repressing that fear when you get when you are interacting with woman - desensitise ? IT's NATURAL TO BE GOOD WITH WOMAN ... it's in your nature to be good and social even with woman. ask yourself this ... are they shy because they lack experience or are they shy because they are limiting themselfs ?
you didn't get what i said at all ... maybe you need to re-read everything because im not talking about game.... i also never claimed im good at game.

this whole post is not being good at game ... it's about what is stopping you from being a mature man... bad body language for example doesn't stop you from being a mature man - im talking about behaviour and mindsets , im not talking some 10 step action based platform on how to fuck a girl in 10 minutes.
i agree .. noob is the wrong word ... i should say new people or people who are just new into PU. i just want to see other people do well .. i get frustrated when i don't see people do well or facing the real deeper issue..

but again it's directed to people who are new into PUA... if you you aren't new and you already know what im writing about there is probably or ''maybe'' no need for you to read it. i don't think im teaching people more than they can handle...100 canned routines is more difficult to handle and memorize to my opinion. again other people decide for themselfs if it's too much for them or not - i assume we all are intelligent people or at least we want to be.

dondraper for some guys it is.. that's the problem - they fix on external things. that is the whole point about this post .. people who are new into PUA focus on external things instead of focussing on the fact why they aren't good with woman... they all want a magic pill or a technique.

Psych3r you maybe have a good point here .... some guys say they pickup some frustration or emotions in my post like im ranting and ranting.... yes i do get emotiona and i think it's ok to get emotional as long you have good intentions ... if people fail to understand my intention they probably are failing at understanding me as a person. i don't invest time on this forum to get compliments or to look good..... why is it bad to get emotional anyway at least im showing my honesty ?

as for the delivery ; it can always be better
this is the whole point of my post .. i don't want guys to 10000000 pushups , i don't want them to learn all these canned materials , techniques and routines - im coming from a less is more context.
do people need PU to get better with woman ? that's the question.... or can they do something else to get better at everything at the same time ? if you suck with woman you are failing to communicate with woman - if you suck communicating with other people you probably suck communicating with yourself as well wether on a emotional level or thought level.
again the whole point of my post ... people think how they feel instead of really feeling , they feel some bad emotions and they judge them - they cgive it the anxiety label .. who tought you what anxiety is or fear ? emotions cannot be rationalized , people who are having problems relating to woman always tell you they feel fear .... why do you even call it fear ?
the problem is that alot of people are reinforcing things which aren't that important at all like techniques / body language.... look if you ask a specific question about body language i will talk about body language , if a guy writes he sucks with woman body language isn't the issue.

_________________
AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
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