How many times to go for the meet before nexting her?



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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 9:13 pm 
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Hey guys, just been wondering about this since it's happened to me a lot and it's annoying. I'll get a girls number and will be texting her, she'll seem like she's into me and will text me a lot (sometimes dirty texts), then when I go for the meet she won't do it. She'll either tell me she's really busy (and that she does want to meet me), or she'll agree to meet then flake. I know sometimes that girls are busy or things do come up at the last minute, but I also think a lot of girls just enjoy teasing guys. So I guess what I'm asking is how many times should you ask a girl out before nexting her? I don't want to next a nice girl who is genuinely interested but I don't want to be messed around either.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 9:15 pm 
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freeze her out for a few weeks.

Let her initiate the contact. If so, send her a short message "I want to see you next week, on friday, 2 pm" (not asking, but telling her!)


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 9:36 pm 
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Hey guys, just been wondering about this since it's happened to me a lot and it's annoying. I'll get a girls number and will be texting her, she'll seem like she's into me and will text me a lot (sometimes dirty texts), then when I go for the meet she won't do it. She'll either tell me she's really busy (and that she does want to meet me), or she'll agree to meet then flake. I know sometimes that girls are busy or things do come up at the last minute, but I also think a lot of girls just enjoy teasing guys. So I guess what I'm asking is how many times should you ask a girl out before nexting her? I don't want to next a nice girl who is genuinely interested but I don't want to be messed around either.
Hi amigo.

Listen up, a girl who is genuinely interested in you will contact you herself is she doesnt hear from you. You can try 3, maybe 4 times, but then i ll just look for somebody else. Although i think anthonypham is right when he says: dont ask, but tell her, i wouldnt re-initiate contact myself. I would see it as some test to check how interested she really was.

cheers

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 10:05 pm 
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Always lead (tell her your going to hang out) instead of asking and you could see a monumental shift in your level of success. If you're doing this already, obviously one or two times is enough to give her an invite to hang out with you. If she was legitimately busy she will re-initiate speaking.

Also this might be different from what some people do, but personally I dont even contact a girl unless i have plans to hang out with her and am going to ask her in that conversation. I don't have time for small talk with a girl I hardly know. Now that is just me some people have text game, I personally dislike texting so choose to abstain with small talk via text in most circumstances.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 10:14 pm 
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Always lead (tell her your going to hang out) instead of asking and you could see a monumental shift in your level of success. If you're doing this already, obviously one or two times is enough to give her an invite to hang out with you. If she was legitimately busy she will re-initiate speaking.

Also this might be different from what some people do, but personally I dont even contact a girl unless i have plans to hang out with her and am going to ask her in that conversation. I don't have time for small talk with a girl I hardly know. Now that is just me some people have text game, I personally dislike texting so choose to abstain with small talk via text in most circumstances.
hehehe i like you!

But let me correct one point: there is no such thing as 'text game'. People who do believe in that, snap out of it and get back to reality please!

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"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 8:43 am 
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Always lead (tell her your going to hang out) instead of asking and you could see a monumental shift in your level of success. If you're doing this already, obviously one or two times is enough to give her an invite to hang out with you. If she was legitimately busy she will re-initiate speaking.

Also this might be different from what some people do, but personally I dont even contact a girl unless i have plans to hang out with her and am going to ask her in that conversation. I don't have time for small talk with a girl I hardly know. Now that is just me some people have text game, I personally dislike texting so choose to abstain with small talk via text in most circumstances.
Thanks for the replies guys :)

Will try just asking them out twice, then leaving them to do the work afterwarrds. Like you guys said if they're genuinely interested they'll get back to me.

I actually think this could be why I get this so much, I mean I text a lot, so the girls must get comfortable with having fun conversations over text and want to keep it at that. I will have to see what kinds of results I get if I cut down on the texting. The reason I text a lot is that I've had quite a few easy lays through texting, I just escalate and start sending filth, then the ones I do meet always end up shagging on the first meet. Hmm...


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 9:49 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
Always lead (tell her your going to hang out) instead of asking and you could see a monumental shift in your level of success. If you're doing this already, obviously one or two times is enough to give her an invite to hang out with you. If she was legitimately busy she will re-initiate speaking.

Also this might be different from what some people do, but personally I dont even contact a girl unless i have plans to hang out with her and am going to ask her in that conversation. I don't have time for small talk with a girl I hardly know. Now that is just me some people have text game, I personally dislike texting so choose to abstain with small talk via text in most circumstances.
Thanks for the replies guys :)

Will try just asking them out twice, then leaving them to do the work afterwarrds. Like you guys said if they're genuinely interested they'll get back to me.

I actually think this could be why I get this so much, I mean I text a lot, so the girls must get comfortable with having fun conversations over text and want to keep it at that. I will have to see what kinds of results I get if I cut down on the texting. The reason I text a lot is that I've had quite a few easy lays through texting, I just escalate and start sending filth, then the ones I do meet always end up shagging on the first meet. Hmm...
Don't discount the fact that some women like a guy who has the testicular fortitude to pick up the phone and call too. Texting is overrated.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 6:47 pm 
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Don't discount the fact that some women like a guy who has the testicular fortitude to pick up the phone and call too. Texting is overrated.
Very true. I'll admit I suck at talking on the phone, I should definately work on that.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 8:13 pm 
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True if a girl is genuinely interested she will initiate contact.... BUT, what would make her genuinely interested in you?? Meeting you once in a drunk noisy bar does not qualify unfortunately.

SO you must engage her and MAKE her genuinely interested in you. THEN you chill and wait for her to ask you out.

It all comes down to understanding the female psyche. Once you can do this, you will see seduction on a different level.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 5:35 pm 
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How many times have you spoke to her on the phone, brotha?

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 6:29 pm 
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How many times have you spoke to her on the phone, brotha?
I never speak on the phone, like I said I suck at it. Will have to sort it out :)


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 8:28 pm 
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My rule of thumb is two attempts with two tries each. After that C-YA.

I agree with the statement that if they are into you, they will make the effort.

It seems to me that you are getting a number and that's good, but a girl will give her number to just about anyone. I never understand why people get stuck on # close because getting a number is cake. If you don't have you game down when you get the # you will just be viewed as casual entertainment. You have to have pretty solid follow up game to over come that if that's the issue and that can explain your low retention rate.

Just making a girl laugh at your jokes and think you're cute is like 1 drop of water in a large bucket. Work on getting at least a cup full before you # close and you will probably see better results.

If you don't have a choice and a quick and dirty # close is all you had time for, you have to accept the fact that are still at square 1.5 with her. Get her out with you asap. Fix your phone phobia as voice to voice agreements are 10x harder to flake on than txt dates. If you can't get them to meet you or agree to meet you in person within a week, move on, it's a dead prospect. At that point just let them go for a few weeks and then randomly invite them out to a club when you are already going with friends and planning to have a good time regardless of their presence. Let them see you in action or not at all.

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 08, 2011 8:59 pm 
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Majority of the time if a girl flakes it means she isn't that interested in you. If she was she would make an effort to meet you. As far as how many times to make an attempt to meet her, I say twice with the second time with you saying something to the effect of if you are ever free to meet up let me know. And walk away. Now you can freeze her out so to speak and stop talking to her for awhile, tho more than likely that most probably won't raise her interest level that much and if she goes out a lot more than likely she has gotten more guys numbers and such there is a chance she has forgotten about you.


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