Honestly, I can't take this anymore.

First - let me say that I've been out and opening everyday for the past 8 weeks. I'm not one of these guys that sits all day infront of the computer and just reads this stuff.

But really, I'm slowly losing my mind.

"Start kino immediately! Within 1 minute!"
"If she touches you, say "hey hands off that would be $70!"

"Show INTENT - be a sexual guy!"
"Do NOT demonstrate interest before you get 3 IOIs!"

"Be DIFFERENT - a PUA is the exception to the rule!"
"Be NORMAL - girls want to see that you are a normal guy and not some FREAK"

I f closed within 4 hours by being myself. Other times - I've been myself and been blown out off sets within 30 seconds. I used lines that some girls LOVED and then used them on other girls that looked at me as if I'm a UFO.

(but they all love the ring routine... it's gold

At this point I feel that ISOLATION is the most important factor because girls just behave so differently once alone with a guy vs. next to their friends. And then another thing - calibration. Girls which are cold / nerdy / unfriendly - to just eject ASAP and move on. Why waste time.

God... this is really going to take 2 years to master, isn't it....

The stuff I bolded is only applicable for INdirect game, and only for the first few minutes - i.e. before you show interest. If you subscribe to any other theory, especially DIRECT game, then don't worry about that shit at all.

It's far better to work on your calibration skills by escalating quickly and being sexual, and seeing how far you can go, then it is to hold back because you're worried about doing something wrong or making a "mistake."

And yes, what works really well on one girl may not work on another. There is no opener, routine or anything that works on 100% of women, and there is no PUA in the world who has a 100% close rate. The girls that your shit "worked" on, were the ones who were attracted to you. The girls that looked at you weird, may have had a polite conversation with you, but probably would have never fucked you anyway because they weren't attracted. Simple.

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Good that you are gaming the last 8 weeks!

I can understand that the different approaches (MM, 60 years, etc.) sometimes tell the opposite.

I think you should think for yourself what suits you best. And of course, CALIBRATE! Try to feel the setting and the girl to do what is best.

For example, i don't kino immediately. I think girls will see this as 'touchy'. So i start with Attraction (A1), and when I am in Male-to-Female interest (A2) and I see in her eyes that she is having fun, then I start kino. First some small Kino.

If she is the one who starts touching, then yeah, you can kino immediately

OK - just one question. Is there a general agreement on this one - what works best at bars / clubs ? Direct or indirect?

Edit - I guess indirect? I hate it... makes me feel like a puss. I started going direct after watching "keys to the vip"... the girls there seems to really accept it as totally cool and normal.

Edit 2 - 60 Years.... WTF, another 800 pages to read. But this looks like exactly what I've been doing / thinking about in the last few weeks.

Agreed, calibration. Choose a certain tool for a certain job. You don't use a baseball bat to unscrew a lightbulb.

remind me of the ufo opener ..

'' hey i just saw a ufo outside .. '' do you believe in ufo ? ''

the look on their faces lol

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If going indirect doesn't feel 'right' to you and your approach is more congruent with direct, go direct. It can't hurt to have a few tools in the arsenal that (as other posters have said) can be calibrated to different situations...

Whichever way you go: as long you are confident, great body language, great social intelligence, and give off an aura of congruence, it'll be alright.

I worry sometimes that there's too much focus on theory and not enough just going and doing it. All cock and no balls, to put it another way

There are a lot of different gaming styles with a lot of different "rules", pick the one that's most congruent with your personality.

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One cannot lose what one has never had.

Oh god.... I've just been in a fight... with two girls. Pushing, hitting, finger giving, "fuck off" - the whole shenanigan.

I read the first two books of 60 YC and decided to give it a try tonight and not do anything verbal and go almost 100% kino. (something I do many times anyway but today to be completely aware of it)

So I spoke with my friends, danced and had fun and then opened a few sets which didn't work out, one of them was a two set of young HB8-9, blonde hot looking chicks. They gave me the "creep" look, so I moved on... (he writes a lot about it, I guess being looked at as a creep goes hand in hand with this low verbal high eye contact method).

Anyway... they kept dancing in my vicinity (but it's a small club, so I'm not sure it meant anything) going away and coming back, and at one point they were standing between me and one of my friends. So I decide to walk across them (in between them, or just move them away a little so I can get thru to my friend, I don't even remember but NOTHING aggressive, no body contact or ANYTHING) and out of NOWHERE they started punching me, calling me names, telling me to fuck off etc.

What the fuck................ People actually had to move them away from me.


All this reading about body language and supplication, and I guess the fact that I broke up from my girlfriend of 9 years just 3 months ago really made me aware of how much power girls have over us.... and I decided to not accept it anymore. (my girlfriend has been totally manipulative and has been taking advantage of me for years... finally when it "hit" me, I broke up with her).

I keep seeing in clubs how girls stand straight and never lean in while the guys totally give away their power and bend over, or are weak while approaching girls, while I'm completely aware of what I'm doing and never let it happen.

This has strange effects... first of all - girls hate it. Full on confidence NEVER works, and I wrote about it in another post. But what can I do, that's how I feel right now.

Then a couple of days ago a random guy came to me out of nowhere and told me "hey, you look like someone with high status here, do you know where I can get a cigaret?" (exact quote) I didn't know what the hell he was talking about.

Anyway, what can I say.... Another crazy night. I think I need to have a rest for a week, going out for 8-9 weeks straight is really starting to show. I feel like I need to completely "reboot" and format myself.... but I'm not sure with what new OS to go with.

Then as I walk out of the club I meet a girl I haven't seen for a month, last time we met was in another country.... (spent about 6-8 hours of comfort with her, but was never able to make a move) such a random encounter... and I've been thinking about her all this time. Then she introduced me to her BF... (who just joined her in her travels for a few days) but she is all happy to see me and makes arrangements to meet me together with her boyfriend tomorrow. When we were together she told me that she is "ok with cheating" (i reminded her of this today, when the BF wasn't around) I should have totally made a move on her when I had a chance.

crap.

Anyway.... what a night.

[quote="phangan"]


I guess the fact that I broke up from my girlfriend of 9 years just 3 months ago really made me aware of how much power girls have over us.... and I decided to not accept it anymore. (my girlfriend has been totally manipulative and has been taking advantage of me for years... finally when it "hit" me, I broke up with her).


[quote]

Here's your issue right here. You still have some bitterness and a chip on your shoulder from your last relationship. Right now you are about as sexy and attractive to women as those bitter fucked-over chicks on Oprah are to guys.

When you get out of something like that it takes a little time to get your feet back on the ground and get back into your stride. Right now you may have some bitterness, some confusion (no doubt) some resentments and may even be a bit misogynistic at the moment. People can smell that like a dead skunk in the road and will get a little creeped out.

Don't sweat it, it WILL pass.

As far as all the 'do-this-not-that' and Mystery vs 60 etc etc.. screw all of that. Just get out and enjoy life, enjoy your new freedom and get into doing things you like and hanging out with some people you enjoy.

You old battle wounds will heal quickly and your attitude will clean up quickly and in a short period of time you will be out having fun and then people will WANT to be with you.

Right now you are trying to apply some kind of formula and Jedi mind tricks on people whilel you are bogged down with some emotional baggage and it is coming off creepy.

Get out and have some fun, heal your wounds, have some more fun and just talk and interact with people and the rest will come naturally

Thanks for the advice.

Bitterness ....of course... It was a terrible breakup, spread over a few months. As I said, she was very manipulative, was always victimizing herself, very demanding, narcissistic...

A week ago I received an email from my ex's best guy friend telling me that he is done with her because she is "the most manipulative and dangerous person he ever met", calling her a "scumbag" and worse... apparently she almost got his girlfriend to break up with him. So after 9 years you realize that you've been with someone who is a complete nut who has a terrible side of her you never really knew about.

Not fun. Lets see you trust a woman again after something like that. And that's about 5% of the whole story.

Problem is - I don't have 6 months - a year to just "live my life" and enjoy myself and try to forget about her. I'm 32 and want to nail this skill so I can move forward and enjoy women. This is something I've been wanting to do for ever and perhaps I trapped myself in such a LTR because I was afraid to face with it (going out there, opening, being social, etc)


But, with all honesty... I'm enjoying myself. This fight with these two girls yesterday was plain crazy, I have no idea where it came from. Since the breakup I met some great people, had a few crazy SNLs, been traveling around Asia, learning about people and myself more than most people learn in a lifetime.


In two days I'm going to fly over to Ibiza and stay there for a month or two, I'm going to meet up with a PUA there. I'm going to sign up to the gym, get myself into a healthy routine and slowly work on my game.

Thanks again for the support guys, this forum is great.

i went through that.

only for eleven years.

so, i feel your pain.

ever trust a woman again?

it's not a concern.

wanna know why?

because if you aren't afraid to lose her,

it doesn't fucking matter.

this is finally sinking in for me.

it's like a fundamental phase shift.

no more worrying about "keeping" ONE girl.

if she finds something better, fuck her, she can move on.

that's my new mindset.

it's a position of total POWER.

as for "love", that shit is for fairy tales.

i'm not bitter.

it's just that every version of love i've experienced, was horrible.

on your original point,

having read some of 60's stuff, i perceive that a man's appearance is very important to pulling off that method. you've gotta have the "look" to go with the "vibe".

idk

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Thanks. Yes, that's why I want to become a PUA. Once you can get women easily, they lose power over you.

About love.... this should be mandatory reading for all PUAs:

http://www.amazon.com/Sex-Dawn-Prehisto ... 0061707805

It's basically the story of how monogamy (and hence romantic love) were invented to create private property that could be controlled and taxed. I won't get into this here, maybe in another post, but monogamy is a lie. We are not designed to be with one person - not for a lifetime, and possibly not even for more than one night.

About the 2nd point - luckily I do have that look... girls open me, tell me that I'm sexy etc. I'm 32 but look more like 26-28, when I told a girl last week that I'm "28" she didn't believe me because she thought I was 25

btw, when i say look...

i mean wardrobe.

when i read 60's stuff,

i picture the guy standing at the end of the bar, with a sport coat, and a flashy watch on...

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

OK cool. I'm in Bangkok tomorrow, I'll get myself a nice fake Rolex and shit like that