So I'm a bit of an AFC. Lately I've had my heartbroken by a girl I fell in love with who suddenly decided I wasn't good enough and moved onto someone else and now they seem like they're about to get together...so I feel I need to go find someone else.

So I'm going to an Indie/Rock type place on Friday, I thought this would be quite suitable as I have the long hair/beard thing - I doubt I'd be hugely succesful in an RnB type place!

So, any general pointers for an inexperienced AFC? Anything that will help me? Thanks for any replies!

what are you trying to achieve from this? get a number? talk to 1 / 2 / 3 girls? Set yourself a clear goal in your mind

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I came, I saw...

Get a number/kiss

Ok, so you need to be feeling good about yourself. Maybe get a haircut / beard trim before you go and spend some time working out what you want to wear. choose a decent aftershave - smell is very important in closed confined spaces like clubs and take gum and chew at all times if you're angling for a kiss close. Don't stand in 1 place too long, don't stare at girls or they'll freak out. Be with your mates, be having a good time, scan the room. make eye contact with people and smile but dont continue to stare. move on. IF a girl is in to you she'll keep looking over and trying to get your attention and smiling or giving positive IOI's.
If you are getting these signals approach - give her an instant time constraint - I've only got a minute as my mates want to go dancing but we were arguing that this band sounds a lot like "insert band name here" and we needed a third party opinion - what do you think? of course her answer doesnt matter. Make sure at this stage you havent given her your name. If she doesnt ask and doesnt volunteer hers at this stage smile, thank her and move back to your mates. if she does it's an IOI and you can maybe invite her over to your group to dance.

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I came, I saw...

Thanks, will give the beard a bit of a trim. As for my hair, I can try conditioning it plus brushing and then combing, I've done that before and girls have commented on how soft it is - so just as long as it's not like a bird's nest, right?

Is there a rule regarding a girl looking at you more than once, or looking at you for longer than a second?

Bump

i kinda disagree about just standing around waiting for a girl to make eye contact. but if you do follow through with it just make sure you approach her almost as soon as eye contact is made. if you hesitate for too long, or you just wait there and try thinking through what you want to say to her you just building her up and giving her value. you need to go in there like you have higher value. that's why i suggest just approaching sets as soon as you see them. just make a generic opener, asking their opinion, you'll find a lot on this site, the "jealous girlfriend" is pretty good.. i'm a newbie so i don't know if you should take this advice, but it makes sense in my head, just trying to help out.

No offence guys but these pointers are horrible.

Make yourself look nice and go out with some friends. Most important rule: HAVE FUN. Thats really all that matters.

When you see a girl you wanna meet, walk up to her and start chattin. What you open with doesnt really matter.

Your only criteria for success is the approach. For now, if you approach you have succeeded therefore it doesn't matter how the rest of the approach goes because you have already made a success therefore you wont need to feel any pressure.

No matter how nervious you feel, stay present in the moment and out of your head. After 2 - 3 minutes you will notice that your heart will stop racing and your head will stop spinning.

Remember, shes just a harmless girl and your a man. Nothing in the world is more natural than a man talking to a woman.

From there, just continute to have fun no matter what, even if she walks away or tells you to get lost. Doesn't matter! Just have fun and bring her into your fun world.

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