Quoted for Truth!

When on a date i never care when a silent moment happens!
Usually i try to think about some topic while im being relaxed and layd back and looking around at intresting stuff.

That silences kill a date is utter bullshit IMO.

Just be relaxed and show her u don't care when a silent moment arrives!

Goodluck!

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The idea is that when you break tension, you lower your value. You need to be comfortable with the tension such that she breaks it and you retain your value.

This can absolutely be done on a first date. I've done so with immense success. You'd be amazed at how women will just pipe in with things if you just shut up for a minute.

Remember to kino though, too. Otherwise, it's just a really good conversation and not likely to escalate to anything.

Yes this. Do not fear a silent moment and do not fidget or look uncomfortable with it.

Do NOT say something just to be saying something. Sexual tension builds during periods of silence and you are looking into someone's eyes, especially if you are touching them too (even if it is just your forearms restling slightly against each other)

Sexual tension that is rising is often uncomfortable and awkward feeling so people try to break it with convo and so the say stupid stuff just to be talking. they are making themselves look like an awkward, nerdy AFC when they do that and they break the natural sexual tension at the same time.

The key is to be comfortable with and not show any awkwardness or self-consciousness and to maintain eyecontact and if touching somehow maintain physical contact. If not touching, at least maintain proximity and do not turn away or move away.

As 60 Years of Challenge said, "risk creepy."

The sexual tension that occurs between men and women is natural and Mother Nature wanted it to be there so people will fuck. It's when we start acting like dancing monkeys to entertain people and lessen our own tension is when we start going backwards.

this is awesome.. im getting better each day..

A few hard and fast truths about Awkward Silences:

- I don't get the "awkward silence creates sexual tension" theory unless you're riding really high with your image and already have value attached to you. Awkward silence will fuck shit up unless you're the go-to guy or popular guy or so on.

- Awkward silences are caused when (1) the girl is totally not interested in you (2) she's too nervous/dumb/dull/insecure. (3) Or if you are too nervous/dumb/dull/insecure.


How I overcame the problem (to a large extent):

Keep failing. This is the best way. Find a girl, talk to her. You might fail to make good small talk. No problem. Find another girl, talk again. Fail again. And keep failing till you succeed. And you WILL for sure succeed because you'll get so used to the failing that you'll stop fearing the failure. And the fear of failure is what causes the failure most of the times. All you need is one good conversation after that and you'll pick the momentum.


Oh and doing crazy or adventurous shit does help but not unless you're not comfortable with yourself. It's not the basic requirement for making good conversations. The point is to make HER talk and that happens only when you're comfortable with yourself and with failing. So even if I didn't have a party with 50 of my friends this week or didn't visit Singapore for a vacation, I can still make a good conversation.

_________________
Women are plenty, time is not.

hey, that's so true.. thanks!

just say this very slowly an with pauses

OH......MY........God

look her in the eyes and be wide eyed like its something you cant believe.

99.9% will say what?

at this point keep staring in her eyes and maintain eye contact

I guarantee her voice will go up she'll blush a lil and go what again

at this point you should have thought of something to say and if not you can literally say anything

ie you have the prettiest eyes ive ever seen
you remind me of insert sex idol or other person here and tell a story about it

I opened this girl who looked just like megan fox at a bar recently. I opened her alright poked fun at her but I could tell that I was not building enough attraction and she was losing interest. Nothing I did was working so I switched tactics to shock and awe and played on her vanity a bit.

Me: OMG
Her: what?
ME: ...
Her: What?! (a lil louder this time)
Me: I just... realized... you look exactly like... megan fox. Oh.....My....God
(at this point shes giggling and her attentions on me)
Me: This is horrible
Her: What why?!
Me: Cause I have the biggest crush on her ( you can go into a story about this here or just say the next part) and now whenever I talk to you all Im gonna be able to think about is her and how hot you are.

you dont even have to go the S&A route I do cause I like to talk about sex and this is a great way to transition into it. This works even better if you are touching the girl. Eye contact is super important though. I've even gotten away with not saying anything and just staring and got the same result.

short version: when in doubt say omg but know that you can say anything or nothing

Hmmm. To be honest I still suggest the raw failure->success method to weed the problem out instead of finding quick fixes and cutting corners.

_________________
Women are plenty, time is not.

Confidence!!!
Just stay in your confident frame and she will assume that she is the one being awkward

this is really funny.. i will remember this one forever!

This just isn't true. Awkward silences happen all the time in healthy, normal conversations. Conversations wax and wane, and sometimes there's just a brief lull where you're not sure to say next.

It creates tension because you're just sitting there looking at each other. It's uncomfortable. Now if the couple is comfortable with each other, then it's perfectly ok. They might just look at each other and smile, maybe do something else. It's not a big deal. That's the kind of comfort you want to convey. It's more of a comfort in yourself than a comfort in her.

Of course you still need to have things to say, and initiate the conversation, and listen to her, and add things from your life that compare to hers, and all that other stuff. This is just the way you deal with those brief silences. When you make it clear that you're uncomfortable with them, you lower your value almost instantly.

Even then, it's not really about what you do but how you do it. Most guys overthink things, and trip themselves up. This is just a method to keep you from overthinking it. Whatever works to keep you from overthinking, works period.

Hey @motmotkulangot, have you ever heard of multiple threading theory (M.T.T)? It is actually just a fancy name for a simple conversation technique. It reduces dramatically dying out coonversations. It goes like this.

I will give you two stories, first one is die out conversation waiting to happen, while second is guaranteeing we-have-a-lot-to-talk-about effect.

--1--
She: What do you do for living?
You: I am an engineer, I build bridges. You?
She: I am a bartender in a elite club uptown.
You: Really? That's cool. In what club do you work?
She: Club XYZ
And so on, and so on...

--2--
She: what do you do for living?
You: I am an engineer, I make bridges and I couldn't imagine doing anything else, even though a couple of years back, I could never see myself in this position, and I will tell you why later...
**this is what M.T.T. is all about, talk about something, digress a little, and say, I'll tell you about it in a second**
... it's just that feeling that I have at the end of the project, the fact that I have connected hundreds of families, friends, lovers, makes my job easier. What do you do for living?
**notice that I haven't told her about the thing I said I will, at least, not yet**
She:I am a bartender in a elite club uptown.
You:wow, I mean my job is hard, I put blood, sweat and tears in every bridge, but being bartender is probably the hardest job there is.
**here you make pause to see if she will start the conversation, which she certainly will, she is curious now, she wants to know why do you think her job is hard, and by doing that she lowers her value, and your rises, you WANT pauses in your conversation**
She: It is hard, it is exhausting, but people don't really understand it, especially people who like you, why do you think it's hard?
You: Well, you are gorgeus. I mean, don't get full of yourself, beauty is common,. What is really rare is great outlook, sense of humor and great personality...
**I took this piece from Mystery**...
..., I'll tell you all about in a second...
**again, you are telling her what you will talk about, and she will eventually remind you of that**...
Bunch of drunks are trying to hit on you, and you have to be good to all of them, smile all night, and it is emotionally exhausting, it's tough out there.
She: Yeah, exactly!
**Purposefully put pause, and let her start conversation**
She: So, you said that you wanted to tell me something later...
You: Oh, yes, well, it's just that....


What you want to do is start one topic, not finish it, open another, open third, talk about second, then finish first, then go to third, open fourth, YOU have to be the leader of conversation, open a lot of topics. Talk like this:

You: I once had a girlfriend who was a bartender, but before I get into that, I was wondering something about you...
**lay back, and let her ask what**
She: What were you wondering about?


You don't even have to finish the bartender girlfriend story, let her remind you, when conversation stales out she will be searching for stuff that you could talk about, and she will remember this stuff...


This is just an example of conversation, my conversations were like the --1--, and then I found some guys who taught me this, and I've seen it in Mystery method. It's powerfull, and at the end of the night you can look at her and say:"Wow, we really have a lot to talk about", she will have to agree with you, because you have so much opened topics that yet wait to be finished.


B.T.W. this is what happens in normal conversations, we just forget it when we are around hot girls... Sorry for long message, I really, really hope this will help you, because this was my big problem before...


P.S. Try using irational and abstract language rather than boring and usual, just like I did when I was explaining why I am engineer.


Take care bro, and good luck out there...

cool!!! that's a big help.

Okay, try it out tonight, and keep us posted.
You will probably need some time to grasp all that, so don't be dissapointed if you fail, which first time you probably will. But, KEEP TRYING!!!
And, I advise you not to drink, so that you could clearly remember the conversation. You need that to rewind the conversation and try to remember of mistakes you've done.

can i approach a woman when her face looks upset?

i plan to have a tattoo on my arms to have more confidence is it a good choice or bad?