Assumption: A human possesses a set limit which determines satisfaction.
Assumption: Increasing levels of satisfaction increases happiness.
I don't believe there was any inherent assumption of a limited level of satisfaction, that is in direct contradiction towards my beliefs which are based on the tantric concept of always being able to increase the levels of pleasure and happiness that one can achieve in life. I also don't believe the two are directly proportional, although they do seem to be somewhat interrelated at times. I am incredibly happy at the moment and my life is fantastic lately, yet I am far from truly satisfied with it and I have a long way to go before that is ever the case.
I also find it of interest that. . .
They must therefore accept that they may not always be enough to fully satisfy their partner
But then goes on to say. . .
it should be easy to find proof to reassure yourself that your partner is bonded to you for real reasons and that you fulfill and satisfy them in ways that other people can’t or don’t as well as you can.
Am I the only one confused by the above?
As for those quotes, I don't see them as conflicting. I'll give instances from my own life for easy to create examples:
I've been seeing a girl that I have a very deep connection with and she feels the same towards me. I crave as much emotional contact and attention from people as I can get because it fires me up, I feel like I can accomplish anything and I become incredibly productive and successful when I'm getting enough of it. She can't give me as much attention as I want and I'd get bored of getting the same kind of attention all the time so I get the variety of emotional sates I crave by being with lots of different people. This is true of many people, homo sapiens are not solitary creatures by nature and that's just an anthropological fact.
If one of the states I desire at some point is one that I'd get by having sex with someone and she's not around, then she is happy that I can get those feelings from someone else when she can't be the one to do so because she cares more about my happiness than about who is making me happy. I come back to her for reasons that are based on the sum of her personality and everything that makes her her, not because when I want to have sex she's the one who will give it to me. Some other girl may be fun to hang out with and be a sexual partner of mine, but she doesn't make me feel the way that my main girl makes me feel and so I'll always go back to her unless I find someone who surpasses her ability to make me feel "loved" and that I feel "love" towards.
Perhaps she is around, but the way she makes me feel isn't the way I desire to feel at the moment and so I choose to be with someone else instead; that doesn't change anything, she isn't enough for me at the moment so I get fulfillment from someone else instead. She has no jealousy or upset though because I'm happy and she knows I'll come back because I can't get the things I get from her from someone else and so I'll return. If she wanted something from me at that time, there's nothing to say that she can't let me know this and join in or get what she wants from someone else if they can fulfill her needs.
I by no means said that in order to be happy one must engage in polygamy. If I did say that in there somewhere I don't recall it and I would happily adjust the text accordingly as that is not my belief in any way. I am purely discussing the psychology behind why people are typically driven to desire other sexual partners and how to reconcile such desires in your partners and yourself by a greater understanding of why those impulses don't necessarily negate the feelings of "love" or any emotional bonds between partners.
Honestly I couldn't find any way to reconcile jealousy within myself while hanging onto my belief in monogamy for myself. That doesn't mean I don't think it's possible for other people. I believe it is possible, but you would have to merely evaluate the psychology from a slightly different vantage point.
In a monogamous relationship I'd say the place to start would be by merely acknowledging the psychological validity of polygamy and the reasoning behind it, as well as the complex physical and anthropological factors that contribute to the desires to engage in sex with people who aren't your partner and why they might desire to have sex with people who aren't you. From there I find being incredibly open and blunt about the fact that it is preferable to end a relationship than be in one where your partner isn't happy and you are being cheated on. By making this a central ideal in your relationship and letting them know that you would rather that they be honest with you and leave you for someone else if they found someone better, then you can always assume that as long as she's with you and seems happy, then she is and she isn't simply pretending, or you might as well just end the relationship because you're too paranoid to believe what she's telling you and you're assuming that she would lie to you, right? So then I don't see any reason to be jealous cause she's with you and no one else.
That's the best I can do seeing as I don't see monogamy being functional on a long term (50 > years) basis for more than 80% of people. That is a statistic I just pulled out of my ass, so don't ask me how I came up with it, but I challenge anyone to show me a stat that proves mine wrong (no I won't discuss it unless you have a factual stat, I think we can agree that won't go anywhere and I don't need anymore mental masturbation,).