Un capitalized prom night recovery help.



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PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 5:30 am 
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Joined: Tue May 17, 2011 5:11 am
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So about 6 months ago my friend got me into the world of pickup and got the pleasure of watching me fail and get used to failing. I stopped because I felt like it wasn't something I could use to get a serious relationship.

Anyway I asked this girl I work with (she's 21 & I'd rate her as a 7 without makeup on) if she would go to prom with me (I'm 18) I've only had the job for about two months now but I really have felt an attraction towards her. She said yes and I had already pre determined I was not going to try to game her but rather try being myself.

Well prom went great (she's a very playful person) and she basically stayed near me the whole time at prom. I felt like there was attraction and I was giving her comfort around all the people she didn't know. About 4 hours into prom she wanted to leave and go drinking so I put my arm around her and we walked to the car. She got the beer and we parked in an empty parking lot. I feeling like it was time for me to make a move, got her to slow dance with me in the rain. Not thinking about the build up, I told her I liked her. Instantly she told me she liked me as a friend and well I took it to heart. She ended up rejecting me from giving her a goodnight kiss and well it was all bad.

The next day my co workers told me I needed to follow up and ask her to hangout sometime and I did and we are this weekend......

Anyway i've come to the conclusion that she needs to be gamed but I'm having trouble figuring out how I'm going to game her now that she knows I like her. Me being a newbie at this, could use some advice. My main goal is to have a long lasting relationship with her but I know PuA is about start-middle-end. Still advice would be nice.


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PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 6:01 am 
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Joined: Tue May 10, 2011 5:53 pm
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Location: Pittsburgh, PA
This could be one of the worst ways to apply the philosophies of PUA into a person's life. The girl rejected you, and that is not the fault of whether or not you were acting like a PUA or an AFC. It is just what happened, and it is unfortunate, I'm sorry.

But game is not something you just decide to do to a girl when she says she doesn't want a relationship. That's, for lack of a better term, the quickest path to the dark side. That is how you start to study all of the methods of manipulation and trickery that sneak into PUA ideas. Do not let this get to you and consume you, bud. Your best option is to just not try to change her mind. There is no magic potion to make a woman love you, which is what you want. Especially in your case, now. telling a girl you like her may be the worst thing you can do. I'm excluding all the PUA/AFC talk, because telling a girl you like her just puts a tremendous pressure on her to respond in certain ways. Asking for the date, going for the kiss, there are so many better ways to show you are attracted without verbalizing it in such a blunt, awkward way.

She will interpret everything you do as a way to make you like her, and you should not bother. I know you don't want to hear this, you want a strategy to win her, and that is called ONE-ITIS!

You are hurt, you think this girl is the one surefire way to make your life a happier place, and I can tell you from experience that isn't true. If you want to learn the ways of the PUA, thats fine, but like everything else in life, it can only benefit you if you are doing it FOR YOU. If you are doing it for someone else, it will only hurt you in the end.


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PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2011 7:59 am 
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Joined: Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:47 am
Posts: 94
Location: Slovakia
For me personally the best bet is to say to a girl that I like her after spending just a couple of minutes to at most hours with her.

Obviously I need to have some strong IOIs, which shouldn't be a problem after that time.

The thing that happens when I clearly state my intent (note that it must be clear to her! "I like you" may not actually be enough!), I feel free to actually behave normally. I took the risk of being rejected by her, and that alone is attractive for a woman that has at least some interest in me.

I then proceed to express my feelings in a non needy way!
I say things like "You know I love you" with a playful attitude. She is never truly sure if I mean it. When she says something like "I like you too but only as a friend", I reply by something along the "Well I know you are a girl for me. It's just a matter of time when you realize it as well.. ;) " - again playfully!

The playful tone of voice and your expressions makes her uncertain which in turn makes her to think about you more. Then I escalate physically but never beyond what she feels as really uncomfortable. No attempt to kiss her, if she is uncomfortable with me playing with her hand etc..

In your case, I would just keep on going. Keep it light though! No needy "I need you" or "My life without you is meaningless" kind of shit!

Be happy around her, tell jokes, stories from your life etc. but not to entertain her, but rather amuse yourself! Emotions are contagious! If she feels happy around you, she will be more attracted to you. And from time to time you can remind her that you love her, but in a completely non-reactive non-needy way!

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Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.


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