Like me, we have all been exposed to tons and tons of romantic flicks where the guys runs to the airport, poors his heart out, the girl cries and they live happely ever after.
Now even before getting into the communauty,i figured out by myself most of the AFC "don'ts" and traps (which didn't mean i actualy god laid) but the simple fact is that girls are also exposed to this stuff which means that they are looking for it.
So when does going into AFC mode actually helps us?

The idea of being an AFC isn't something you turn on and off. It's the flawed state of mind where you put the pussy up on a pedestal. It almost sounds like you equate AFC with honesty, which is nowhere close to the case. The only thing that a girl can really keep an eye out for is canned material, which is something more and more guys are learning to stay away from anyways due to that media exposure. No girl is going to call you out for being confident, or being funny. At least, no sane girl is going to do something like that.

Movies are meant to entertain. But PUA ideas can be taken too far as well. Yeah, don't chase after a girl to an airport, but hell if you freeze her out and she decides to leave you're allowed to go outside your door and tell her to come back.

1. When joking.
2. When lecturing on how to keep your innocence.
3. When you want to break up with your girlfriend.

_________________

I'm a winner - I am going to win.

This is funny.

Yeah, i know! I mean i completly agree with waht you guys are saying.
I'm not talking about switching being an AFC on or off, that would mean one has no inner game.
What i'm talking about is ACTING like a an AFC to get the girl or take the relationship further.
i mean movies are meant to enterain, yeah sure, but every girl still wants to be a dysney Princess right?
I mean Style did go AFC to get the girl he wanted. So, could their be some kind of systeme, routine or long terme gaming in which acting like an AFC could help our game?

What did Style do? This is interesting and I haven't heard this.

To answer your question, i m skimming threw the end of "the game",
Basoc;y he met this HB10 who he clicked with wanted a relationship with him. So he went for it big time but she shut him down a number of times.
first time i think was with this:
"David DeAngelo would have said to go cocky funny here. Ross Jeffries
would have said not to buy into her frame. Mystery would have said to punish
her. But I had to ask: "How did I blow it?""

but what i m really talking about came on the next page:

"So then why did you agree to go out with me tonight?"
"You asked me out on a proper date. And you were a little nervous, so I
figured you must really be into me."
I propped myself up on the pillows. I was about to say the most AFC
thing of my life. "Let me tell you something. The pickup artists have a word
they call one-iris. It's a disease that people get when they become obsessed
with just one girl. And they never end up with this girl because they get too
nervous around her and scare her away."
"So?" she asked.
"So," I said. "You're my one-itis."
We were looking each other in the eyes now. I could see hers sparkle. I
knew mine were sparkling. It was time to kiss her.
There were no lines, no routines, no evolution phase-shift—I'd tried
them all unsuccessfully anyway. I leaned in. She leaned in. Her eyes closed.
My eyes closed. Our lips met. It was just like I'd always thought a kiss was
supposed to begin."


So basicly we should go AFC when nothing else works? That can't be right!
And that's defently not what we should do on a regular basis, But their must be something workable and usfull in the "going AFC" concept, i think.

I see. That is interesting. Hmm perhaps the fact he used persistence while DHVing. He probably won her then (without knowing.) She was probably waiting for him to ask her out like a man should, or smoothly or something. The fact that he went all AFC and showed his true feelings probably flipped an attraction switch in her (maybe she was used to guys just liking her for her looks, afterall she is a HB10)...hmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

PS I haven't finished reading The Game, I will get back to reading it soon though! I'm concentrating on MM

He confuses the issue by saying that it was "the most AFC thing of my life". He was actually being confident when he said it. Not nervous, not pussy, not giving up his power. He simply stated his feelings toward her, and to be honest, it was probably one of the most romantic things she's ever heard.

That having been said, it would be a HUGE mistake to then act without frame after telling her that, and I mean beyond the kiss. The next day, the next week, the next month. See, it's not necessarily bad to expose your feelings to a girl, just as long as you do it from the right frame and you know where you want it to lead. For instance, this would have been a bad thing to tell a girl if he wanted just a one night stand -- it's unethical if you ask me, and it can lead to problems down the line. If he wanted a relationship with her, it's fine (again, as long as you don't give up the power in the relationship).

When is it good to go AFC? Never, in my opinion. However, that doesn't mean you can't do certain AFC things when it comes from the right frame.

ok, so now we're getting somewhere!

the question becomes about exposing one's feelings and being "romantic" (which Feek is right, should not be confused with going AFC)
So what frame should we establish to be able to do so? and how do we do that without giving up the power?
What attraction switches does it flip?

(And I think we all agree we should not do this if we're planing a one night stand.)

Gambler has the perfect tactic on that!

Tongue-in-cheek-romanticism;
what this means is that you create really sappy moments like in this cheesy hollywood movies but you make it more and more in an ironically manner.

So what this does is that it creates this really romantic feelings but because you do it in a tongue-in-cheek way you are not being AFC and you're not serious about it.

I guess it depends on the reason you're doing it. If you're doing it as a "bit" in order to "get" something, I don't know if I can help you. If you're doing it because you're serious about it or it comes from within because that's your feelings and your reaction to the situation, then I probably can.

Also, remember what you may be thinking of as romantic may not be in line with what she thinks is romantic. Girls can think the smallest thing is romantic. Probably the best way I can describe it is if it's a situation where you two are connecting on a deeper level than the superficial, that generally has some level of romanticism (and the reason I say it's not for one night stands). Sometimes it's a big thing - like taking a trip together, even if it's just camping for a night or two, sometimes it's the smallest things - like holding the door for her.

I'll give you a couple of examples.

Last year summer, I was big into off-roading. I had a nice lifted truck I took out on the trails almost daily. I met a girl and started taking her off-roading with me (I've not met a girl who doesn't like off-roading, btw...there's a tip for you). At first we were with friends and just hanging out as friends, but as we started getting closer, I found times for it to be just her and me. One of the things we really connected on was a love of astronomy, so one night, I packed a blanket and some pillows and we went to a nice clearing. I laid out the blanket and pillows, and we went to look at the stars. I didn't pour out my feelings for her like you see in the movies or anything, we just talked, and when the time was right, there were no words spoken...I went for what I wanted. She later told me it was one of the most romantic things she's ever experienced.

Another time quite a few years ago, I met this girl late night after a party at a pancake house (like IHOP), and we hit it off. I asked her if she wanted to go for a ride, and we just drove around for a while. At some point, I realized I hadn't seen the ocean in the moonlight before, so I drove us out there. We literally just sat on the car hood for an hour or so mostly just watching and listening to the ocean in the moonlight. We barely talked when we got back in the car except to discuss which hotel we wanted to spend the night in (because we were "too tired to go back"), and the next day she called me a romantic.

Do you need to go through all that trouble to be romantic? No, certainly not, it just happened that those were the situations that presented themselves, and I did things that were congruent with the type of person I am and the things I enjoy. I mean, the second example only took a quarter tank of gas, a couple hours, and the price of a hotel room.

According to what I read here and what I've seen of PUA advice, technically a lot of what I do in regards to this stuff would generally be considered AFC. The difference is that I have extremely strong boundaries (something I'm very good at), quite a bit of confidence (I can actually be an egotistical prick at times, so it's a double-edged sword), and I essentially speak body language like it was my first language before English - for me this is HUGE.

Looking back on my experiences, it's mostly about the frame you build about yourself BEFORE you get in the situation when you're trying to be romantic. If I had to put it into words, I would say that - for the most part - I build strong frame in many small, every day situations so that I can allow myself some AFC when I want to. This is what I mean by being able to do certain (CERTAIN) AFC things if you have the right frame. When I do these things the girl will know that I'm not doing it because I'm needy or clingy or a creep or whatever, I'm doing it because I'm allowing her to connect with me on a deeper level.

I'm not sure I know what you're asking by "which switches it flips", but I hope you got something from what I've typed here.

I think the main confusion lies with the definition of AFC. What is an AFC anyway? Is it behavioral pattern? Or is it state of mind of a man?

I would argue it's the later. And therefore if your state of mind - your "frame" is one of a strong, mature man, then you can use "behavioral patterns" that would be similar to those an AFC would use.

I think Feek illustrated it nicely on his examples.

As for The Game and Style "going AFC", well, you see the girl knew he was a PUA. She was genuinely attracted to him and she probably knew many of the routines anyway. When he finally gave up on the routines and just stated things as he felt them, they came from the correct strong masculine frame. So his frame was not an AFC, but his pattern of behavior seemed like that of an AFC.

_________________
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.

I think you're absolutely right Watchmaker!

It's totally an inner game thing that is reflected by your body-language mostly.
So if you really know what you are doing and you're honest about it you can't really be AFC it's only 'acting' AFC

Great guys. It does clear pretty much everything up.
thank you!