| Okay, this is a field report about my first approach I tried to do in an actual club location. It went badly, I pretty much made most mistakes one could do, but at least I stepped over my boundaries (going up to someone) and got to meet all my new limits. So, here it goes how it went.
So we were serenading with my class (graduation tradition - the whole class visits the places where the teachers live and sing songs and get "travelling rations" [snacks and drinks] at each of them) so after that we went to a place with the people from class who decided to stay and party (also tradition)
So we got to this place, Lapos (Literally translated "Flat" because the place is one-level building with a completely flat roof) and it is one of the biggest party places where I live. But the thing is, this was the first day of spring break (not nearly as big of a thing as in USA, but still) and the other place where people party had a concert in it so it was packed, and other classes were partying after serenading, so the place was FRIGGIN' CROWDED. And way too loud. Too high intensity. Also, with about 65% guys, all dressed as AMOG douches and most of them twice my size, we (I had a buddy with me) didn't stand out positively at all.
I just introduced that buddy of mine (Let's call him Tom) to the PUA stuff (poor fellow had even less luck with the ladies than I did) so we decided to try what we learned.
First thing, we looked around places for gamable girls (It was too crowded to start a chat anywhere) and then we seen two girls who looked bored and stood by the wall with some empty space in front of them (A HB8 who didn't seem interested in us all, and her HB8 girlfriend who looked like she never seen such a freak-of-nature thing as guys asking her opinion about stuff in a club).
The first mistake we did was choosing them - We were afraid to approach girls that were already having fun. So we got these. After standing a few metres away from them for a few seconds (it was too crowded, so it didn't matter) so we got there with the only approach that got into my mind when we decided to sarge (I totally blocked down) that was the second mistake, using a low-intensity and low-fun opener in such a high intensity place. I used the "jealous girlfriend" thing. I didn't get the AA too much until going up to them, then I got that nervousness in my stomach.
So I said (not too believably - I didn't practice it) that me and my buddy (who didn't follow me right away, so "my buddy" wasn't there when I mentioned him.. I had to pull him there quickly) were arguing over something all day. We gotta go back to our friends in a minute, but we need your opinion on this. So we got this friend... and he has this girlfriend. And the girl freaked out cuz she found the pictures of his exes on his phone and y'know, freaked out. So it wasn't their first fight, and we are arguing about that he should choose to get rid of the girl or the pictures. So what do you think?"
I kept eye-contact with only one girl, because the other seemed distracted too easily. I guess this made it look like I was talking only to one of them. The girl I was talking to seemed to concentrate very hard on what I was saying (made her look kinda dumb, maybe she was). I forgot not to lean in - the girl didn't lean in to hear what I am saying and because of the way too loud music she couldn't hear me otherwise. I used false time constraint, at least, but the other mistake was that we didn't practice with my buddy, who was just standing there the whole time (AA hit him harder and he didn't get much chance to speak anyway) so the girls didn't look interested in talking at all, all reply we got was "I dunno, that's something he has to decide.." I was too nervous to think of a reply that would make the conversation move forward. I replied "Really? No opinion at all? Well, you guys weren't too much of a help!" (I tried to be kinda playful, but it fell on deaf ears) "Well, we'll find help elsewhere! See ya!" and ejected. Bad location, After-Approach Approach Anxiety (lol, new acronym... AAAA) and the fact that I couldn't keep track of all the things I had to do for a successful opener, and the fact that we looked like dorks between all the douches who looked completely the same (I wore a funny black t-shirt, black jeans, fantasy necklace. It looked good enough but we stood out - negatively) it was a crash and burn.
I blame the location mostly (it really wasn't the place where you could talk, sit down, or anything - way too high intensity place) and the fact that I didn't have a simple and good opener I practiced. Lots of mistakes, lessons learned (Including the fact that I hate such clubs).
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CHAT
