My first field report



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 Post subject: My first field report
PostPosted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 1:13 am 
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Location: Northern Cali
It did not turn out as a i planned, although i am very proud of myself for actually approaching a set and opening. It was my very first time and i actually wasn't that nervous. i was very scared of rejection, but after this, i found out that rejection isn't even all that bad! so here's how it went.

i walked in the club with a smile, chest out, but wen i looked around no1 seemed to notice. I kept my smile cuz even though people didn't notice, i wanted to look like i was having a great time, which I was. Anyway, i was talking to my wing(hes not a really good wing, i'll tell you why later) and to my right was an HB5 talking to an HB7. So i opened the set asking the HB5

(the music is pretty loud, so we have to get in close so we can hear each other)

(me)AFC: Hey, can i get a woman's opinion on something?
(as soon as i started talking to the HB5 the HB7 turned the other way n started talking to her other friends on her right)

HB5: Yea sure, whats up?

AFC: OK so check this, there's this girl that was all touchy feely on me, n we were both getting into it, but we stopped talking cuz it wasn't really getting anywhere. so a year has gone by and all of a sudden, she starts talking to my brother and gets all intimate with him. would you get all weird or mad about that?

HB5: um.. what? i didn't hear you

(i didn't hear what she said, so i leaned in and tried a small kino. i put my hand on her arm, very lightly. then she said very strongly "Please don't touch me" so i back off say sorry and i repeated the question to her.)

HB5: hmm, i don't knowww (she taps the HB7 saying)
what do you think?

(i repeat myself once more to the HB7)

HB7: yea yea, i would be mad, not at both of them, but i would be mad at the girl.

AFC: o ok, yea i was mad at both of them, and my friend here was saying how he totally disagrees with me. (points at my wing, but i turn around and my wing walked away to talk to our friends... so i turned back to the HB's)

HB5: You know my friend over there is single. (she points behind me at this tall girl wearing VERY high heels.)

AFC: (i make a weird face n say) i dun no she really tall, she makes me want to buy heels to match her height.

(i thought that was pretty funny, but there was an awkward 3 second pause)

AFC: do you guys wanna see a magic trick?
(this is were i felt as if i turned into a real bad AFC.)
i can stop my heart beat, its really kool!

HB7: i don't know that sounds really dangerous.

AFC: its not all that dangerous, people do it all the time!

HB5: you know, you need to stop.

(so i was a little shocked, i backed off n left the set)
right after that, i was asking myself ok, what went wrong, what did i do wrong, what should i have done.

what i saw wrong was that i went total afc with that magic trick.
i also forgot to say, "it'll only take a minute cuz i gotta rejoin my friends over there" b4 starting my routine.

what do you guys think?

_________________
21 year old AFC
Still tryna get rid of my AA =(


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 11:27 am 
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Well I felt you did a couple of things wrong and I'll point those things out, but first, let's talk about what you did right. It was definitely great how you went out to the club it all with a "gaming" mentality. This is a difficult mind set for a lot of beginners to even get in, and that alone shows balls. Second, you opened with a pretty decent opener so kudos. Third, I like that you ejected instead of falling to the floor having a seizure.

Now let's talk about where you went wrong, then we'll talk about how you can improve. You engaged the HB5, which is good, however, you need to engage the HB7 in some way shape or form (this can usually be done through a neg or something along those lines). You honestly went into kino escalation too soon. When you got SHIT tested by the HB5 you played into her frame of reality (we'll talk about what you should have done in a moment.). Lastly, even though you recognized it I still have to say it, you asked them like a complete AFC "do you want to see a magic trick." I would be lying if I said I didn't cringe when reading that.

Alright now that the criticism has been delivered, let's talk about what you could have done differently. I first want to point out, that you used an indirect opener, so you're following classic disqualification theory and mystery method.

No problems with the opener, so good job there.

When the HB5 criticized you for touching her, the best thing you could have done was just neg her for it, and if you feel you couldn't get away with that much, just pull away. But never and I repeat "NEVER" apologize for it. But in general, you don't really want to start kino escalation until you get into a transitional DHV story off of your opener.

Next, when she SHIT tested you by saying "our friend here is single," you jumped into her frame of reality by critiquing her friend, and you insulted her........bad move. Imagine if you're hanging with one of your best friends and some chick insults his physical appearance when you mention he's single. Do you see my point? I hope so. What you should have done was escape her frame of reality by saying something like "I didn't come over here to meet anyone like that, I just needed an opinion. But why don't you introduce me to both of your friends then?" Or you could have just replied quickly with something like "and....?" Remember you don't need her help picking up women, and you should feel insulted that she's trying to pawn one on you.

Lastly, after the awkward pause, I think it may have been safe to say "you're out, game is off." So in certain situations where you were getting negative compliance: kino rejection, SHIT test failure, back turned by the HB7, and the HB5 trying to pawn you off on her friend...... at some point you just need to by socially savvy and know when to eject.

So even though you feel good about what you did, don't get too comfortable. This wasn't a good performance in successful pickup. No matter what though, GOOD JOB, it takes balls to do what you did tonight. Don't quit, and take this as a learning experience. Next time you will know what not to do. Good luck!

P.S. Remember to put in a false time constraint next time. (I forget this one a lot myself, but doesn't become as essential as you get better.)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 19, 2011 1:00 am 
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Location: Northern Cali
thanks alot man, its definitely good to hear great advice! ive got to find good ways of doing DHV and transitioning better. i went in with only opening in mind, n had no idea what i was going to do after that. i was sort of hoping that things would just flow after opening. pretty bad plan haha, but im still proud of myself for approaching, feels like i took a pretty big step =D

_________________
21 year old AFC
Still tryna get rid of my AA =(


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 19, 2011 2:40 am 
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Oh snap man! Those HB's were harsh! Sounds like to me you need to open with more confidence, considering she said she can't hear you. Shoulders back, chest out, and project.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 19, 2011 7:34 am 
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Quote:
thanks alot man, its definitely good to hear great advice! ive got to find good ways of doing DHV and transitioning better. i went in with only opening in mind, n had no idea what i was going to do after that. i was sort of hoping that things would just flow after opening. pretty bad plan haha, but im still proud of myself for approaching, feels like i took a pretty big step =D
That in its self is fine. However, your opener is only going to bring you as far as opening. So it's important you have some canned material ready to help you transition further, until you get better at least.


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