Hey guys, im new here. Im 19m and i wanna share a story



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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 6:26 am 
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Joined: Sun Apr 17, 2011 5:52 am
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I guess this is the reason y I decided to get some help.

So I'm in university and an engineer so girls in my department are very limited. But I noticed this one girl that I thought was cute enough to make an effort for. It's hard to find her at times to talk to her, and some times shes with friend (guys most of the time) so Im a little intimidated. I go to the computer lab every morning because she'd usually be there. Sometimes I get there early and sit so when she came in she'd usually sit somewhere else; usually with friends. This happened for a week. One day I got tired of that habit, so I went to the computer lab after a class in the afternoon. She was sitting alone so i went a sat one computer width away (figured it would make it less awkward.) I stared at the computer pretending to do something useful. Then I turned to her and asked her a question and got a conversation going. We talked for like 10mins and I made her laugh, made a stupid joke, smiled the whole time. At one point I asked her for her name and she told me, but I didnt give mine right away (I've heard that not introducing urself and if they ask for it back its a good sign but she kind of looked at me as if i was an idiot for not just letting her know when she asked "and ur name is"). anyways the convo died we went back to looking at our comps and i decided to leave. So i said bye it was nice meeting you and she said bye. I figured that I talked to her once it would be easy to talk to her again. But not the case. it went back to me seeing if I'd run into her in the mornings at the computer room, one time i sat in the same row as the friends she hung out with to hopefully be close enough to start another conv. never happened. But I always catch her staring at me once i waved hi to her but see quickly turned away (not sure if this means anything or not). One time i was walking down the hall with a buddy, i see her a the opposite end with one of her guy friends and she seemed like she was ignoring him and just staring at me, and at one point she bit her lip (yet again am i reading to much into it?). Anyways reading week starts and I wont see her for a week. So I took a desperate attempt and sent her a fb friend request. I figured if she accepted we could talk throughout the week and get to know each other better. But she didnt reply at all to it for 3 weeks and when I got back to school I figured it would be to awkward to try and talk to her again since she didnt even respond on fb. Anyways I pretty much gave. Couple weeks ago I noticed she rejected the friend request. At that point I didnt care anymore.

So what Im asking is where did I screw up? what would someone with actual game do? Do i still have a shot? or any other general advise.

Recently she's been on my mind again. And since its exam time the chances of seeing her are very low. I was thinking of messaging her on fb (probably where I went wrong before) and saying something along the lines of " hey sorry to creep u out with the friend request and now the message, but I thought u were cute and the fact that i catch u staring at me i took it as a good sign"

Right now i guess i got nothing to lose with her so any other suggestion are welcome. I've thought of the possibility that she has a boyfriend but i dont wanna rely on that excuse for my failure.

PS: yet again probably just reading into it to much but the other day i was walking down the road and I see her in the distance walking perpendicular to me staring at me, she had to keep her head turned to the right just to see me. I kept eye contact but never made a movement. Good or bad thing or nothing?

Anyways thx for ur time and advise


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 10:53 am 
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Do you go to the computer lab for any other reason than to hopefully run into her? Thats kind of stalkerish. I think the FB friend request may have been a bit premature, especially since you only talked to her once and not for all that long. Shouldnt have with held your name neither, if you made a good impression, she could have looked you up on FB in which case I hope your profile is set up to present you in a positive way.

As for what you should do now, definitely dont sent a "you're cute" message as that will set off alarm bells that you're only interested in her looks. Do you have any classes with her?


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 3:43 pm 
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Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2011 4:29 pm
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First off can i say, without any offence intended, you sound like you need to work on inner game more than anything. If i was you i would look at the forum and get some confidence building tips, women can sense that alot better than we can.

No one can give you an exact reason as to why she rejected your friend request. The most likely reason is you did to much to fast. Forget the message, next time you see her walk up to her and just start talking, she has talked to you before and will likely talk to you again. Do not bring up the fb thing, if she does just brush it aside like it was no big deal and say something like add me if you want.

Apart from that forget the lines, forget the gimmicks learn to have the confidence to walk up to a woman you like as soon as you see her, and your already miles ahead of 90% of the guys out there


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 4:01 pm 
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I always had something to do at the computer. And ya I agree with the fb stuff, there just desperate attempts I guess, b/c I figured I had nothing else to lose. Unfortunately, we are in two different disciples so we don't even share one class.

And ya, I defiantly gotta work on my confidence. But I think its only the opening I get nervous about, after that I can talk more confidently

Thanks for advise guys, really appreciate it


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 6:45 pm 
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Joined: Sat Mar 05, 2011 4:29 pm
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cofindence is hard and opening is definately the hardest. But what i found useful is one day set yourself the task of talking to 5 random strangers. That might sound a bit scary but force yourself to do it. Look respectable while you do it so as not to scare them off. Then on another day do 10 then 15 and so on until you realise that talking to someone is no big deal.


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