hi,

I wonder if anyone would be so kind to look at my problem.

Theres this girl i have known for a long time and we have been friends for the whole of this time.

Recientlly she has been showing me a lot more time and attention (i aint just imagining it lol)

and just now she told me on the phone she can see herself falling in love with me - but something is stopping her.

I said do you know what it is? lol

She said well im not her usual type of guy and im so nice and kind that she doesnt know if she see's me as just a friend or boyfriend material.

As i say she has been showing a lot of signs she wants more than friends.

I feel as if im right on the line and could go one way or the other - and i dont wanna mess this up lol. - im by no means putting all my eggs in one basket - but i really wouldnt mind if we got together.

she has told me is she attracted to me - but like i say she also said that lol

thank you

Timez82

timebomb.

you are so "nice" , you are "not her type".

so one can safely infer that "nice guy" (you) is not her "type".

good luck, man.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

She can't figure out whether she wants your cock or not. You have to get sexual.

You are in great danger of slipping into the "friendzone". Let's break this into really harsh, simple terms - when a woman says she isn't sure if she wants to date you and that you are a "nice guy" or that you aren't "her type" what she is saying is that thinks you are nutless, timid pussy. It means she see's you more as a male girlfriend or as a gay buddy. She doesn't see you a man that would excite her and stimulate her and engage her sexuality.

Bottom line here is you have been playing it too safe. I can actually see her point here because you are saying that you are afraid to mess it up. Do you think bad boy, alpha male studs worry about "messing it up" when they are hitting on some chick???? Every penny I have is on the answer 'no' on that one.

You have been given a gift here. She has actually straight up told you that she wants you to velcro your balls back on and to escalate and treat her like the sexual being that she is.

Your job now is to man-up and and don't fear her or your sexuality...embrace it.

Here's some nuts and bolts pointers.

-Flirt with her.

-engage her eyes and think naughty thoughts with them.

-Compliment her in a sexual way (in other words compliment her sexyness and body. not her IQ or humanitarian accomplishments)

- tease her and bust her balls. dont treat her like a princess or the prime minister of some european country. treat her like your little sisters buddy.

- Touch her. touch her forearm when you tell her something. give her a gentle little nudge when you tease her. hold her hand or escort her on your arm if you are walking together. brush the hair out of her face when you are looking into her eyes and telling her something personal.

- Give her the blow off and rip on her if she tries to tell you her problems or ask you opinions that she should be asking her girlfriends. If she says something about another guy just say, "I don't want to hear about all your boyfriend problems. If they can't love you up as well as I can that is their problem."

If she asks you for an opinion on what clothes she should wear, say something like, "yeah that's fine if you like that, I you would look hotter in fishnets and a garter belt but that's just me."

In other words be more sexual and more assertive. don't play it safe and be a girlfriend. She already has a bunch of girlfriends, she is telling you she wants a MANfriend.

hmm very interesting lol

Thing is she has self esteme issues - shes hot but she just doesnt see it.

whenever i say something sexual she thinks im lying!


lol wont it seem a bit weird if i change from how i am now with her to what your suggesting like overnight?

hmm but tonight even before i read the replys since my last post i have been doing it a little bit and she seems to be responding somewhat well - but yeah its a tight rope and one blow one way or the other will make or break it - i even said that to her and she was like spot on!

also i said - i think its that you might like someone who isnt your normal type and it feels weird...

she also said omg thats right too - its almost as if she doesnt realise these things till i say them.

Timez

Timez

A lot of times, the girls that are superhot who "don't see it" are actually full of shit and playing games. Just keep it in mind, it's a possibility.

If I don't act hot then I don't act sexual, if I don't act sexual then there will be no sex, if there is no sex there will be control, THAT CONTROL will be mine.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!