Where does confidence come from?
Although SPAM im not doing too badly compared to most guys, im still insecure.

At 18, i still dont feel completely comfortable with myself, my abilities, and looks.

All i want is to become truly confident. Not cocky funny acting to seem confident, i just want actual "True" confidence, where i love myself and can always say if i get rejected "Its her loss, i honestly feel that its her loss and i will not blame myself whatsoever"
I want to never ever feel like i cant get a girl, and know that if it fails i simply wont care. And I want the confidence to be able to comfortably kino whenever i want, to whatever degree which is appropriate.
All the time.

-Have you achieved this level of confidence?
-Is it possible to be this truly confident?
and most importantly:
-HOW do you get this confidence? Like seriously, what do you need to do to be the best version of yourself? Does it come with age? Do you need to be accepted by heaps of girls? Do you need to hypnotise yourself and undo the effects of years of negative impacts? Or are you just born with it?

Give me everything you got

Know what you have to offer someone
Know your capabilities
Know your limits
Constantly push your limits.
Give everything you do 100% so you can always say "i gave it my best"

I still remember the day I had a nervous breakdown. A real one. Kind of a ridiculous and horrible story. Anyways, how does this tie into your question? I'll tell you. I was 23 and when I snapped out of it, I didn't give a fuck what anyone else thought. Literally, to this day, I don't give one single damn what anybody thinks of me. The whole fucking world could hate me and as long as they stayed the fuck out of my way, I would be completely unfazed.

This level of "dontgiveafuckedness" helps with confidence.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Is that from bitterness? or are you happy at the same time?

i had a similar event lead to the "dontgiveafuckedness" state. i came to vomitting my guts up into a squatter (the squat toilets in asian countries) that had a massive turd in it. i was naked, my mate cradling my head so i didnt go face first into the shit and i had an iv bag in my arm. before that i vaguely remember lying in the shower with people checking my carotid pulse (the one in the neck) regularly and asking if i was still alive.

after pretty much the whole company (army) saw me naked and probably in the worst state id ever be in, i kinda didnt worry anymore about what anyone thought when i did things because i knew i would never look as bad as i did that time.

lesson learnt, dont do endless shots malaysian rice wine that they buy in 4L plastic bags of the side of the road

I had the same experience with cocaine. Super Bowl Sunday 1997. Had an 8-ball of some uncut rawdoggies. Was on a 48 hour streak. Had about a half-gram left and figured, hey, why not do it all in one giant line.

Oops.

Hello heart attack.

Hello facefirst into friend's Christmas Tree.

Hello afterlife.

Hello waking up in hospital with needles in me about five minutes later.

Thank God for good friends... (and close proximity to a hospital)

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@ century: happiness

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

woah, inspiring!

Not the part about vomiting from doing to much rice wine or slamming down 3 kilo of cocaine

but about recovering from a bad event which changes your attitude permanently for the better!

yeah i dont want to imagine what would have happened if my mates werent there and they didnt put 2 bags into me that night.

best cure for a hang over = iv bags.

i should also throw in the fact that during basic training i had to wait to shower in the shower block with 30 other guys so i never had a confidence problem being naked around anyone after that.

'Do you need to be accepted by heaps of girls?'

Definitely not. In fact, it's very much the opposite, the only person you need to be accepted by is yourself. I know this is going to sound like a bad Cliché but honestly, total confidence is only going to happen when you are happy in your own skin, and I mean well and truly happy with who you are.

When I first started out I made two lists. One listed all the things that I didn't like about myself. The other a list of all the things that were stopping me from closing with girls. I focused on the prior list first because it was only after I completed that that I could actually begin focusing on the second.

excellent advice with the whole lists thing
thanks