Confident vs. Delusional . . . and Self Limiting Beliefs



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PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2011 2:07 pm 
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While I find your post aggressive and judgmental, I do have to agree with what you say.

By saying "you are better" than her, you only strengthen the ego. The reason this is not a good approach is not because you are somehow a bad person by saying that you are better than some one else, but because IT DOES NOT HELP YOU. It won't make you more happy and more attractive to women, and it won't even make you feel better( and with better I mean truly better on the deepest level)!

Although I do agree that the community has gone into a "wrong" direction in the beginning of its days, I'm starting to see that there are more and more knowledgeable people who can help the guys that are seeking a solution. I don't know this forum that well, but so far I like it (although I must say before I came here I was slightly skeptical about entering a new pickup forum, since I've been out of the community for a while).

btw. kasabi. I understand what you are trying to do with this post. However I found there are better ways of presenting it (better in the sense that it will get through to people's thoughts more efficiently) than to accuse people of being "village idiots". This only creates more resistance to change and resentment.
Have you heard of Marshall b. Rosenberg's "Non-Violent Communication"? This is a system of how to get your emotional needs met (or to express your opinion for that matter) in a way that does not trigger a resistance and more easily accepted.
I don't judge you, since I don't know you, but maybe this can give you some more options on how to get your point across more efficiently.



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PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2011 2:28 pm 
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new rule: the only way to pickup women is by doing exactly as kasabi says, nothing else will work for you.
Well, he said "keep in touch with reality", so i'm afraid that is true...
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all i know is saying "your a disillusioned fool" doesnt make people jump on board with you.
Speaking of, I believe his posts are more motivating that most around here.
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i agree that you shouldnt live on false hope but i suppose its better to think "im of high value" rather than think "im a worthless piece of shit"
There's a lot of stupid arrogant people around who say this. Think about it.
Noticing the reality around you and just where you stand can make you take a decision more than any other crap!


Last edited by poet1234 on Wed Mar 30, 2011 2:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2011 10:41 pm 
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new rule: the only way to pickup women is by doing exactly as kasabi says, nothing else will work for you.
Why is it more important to you to react to my negative voice than to think about the issue at hand? There are a million different ways to converse with others. Go ahead and tell me to F off but shouldn't your thoughts on how to present yourself to others precede ^the above feelings?

because judging by the choice of diction and phrasing i get the feeling that your some disgruntled individual thats so fuming mad, youve become red in the face while you type. lol

it seems like your trying to alpha male everyone on the board by delivering your advice in a negative tone and it makes the actual message less meaningful. all im saying is that your message would be of more useif it was said in a constructive, helpful fashion rather than raw criticism.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2011 11:46 pm 
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because judging by the choice of diction and phrasing i get the feeling that your some disgruntled individual thats so fuming mad, youve become red in the face while you type. lol
So . . . this is the way you navigate through life? You see a smiley face and you do whatever they do?
Quote:
it seems like your trying to alpha male everyone on the board by delivering your advice in a negative tone and it makes the actual message less meaningful. all im saying is that your message would be of more useif it was said in a constructive, helpful fashion rather than raw criticism.
No, not everybody. . . just a handful of village idiots that troll this forum tossing out filth to anybody willing to listen. You might lack some balls but you do know right from wrong. . . so do they.

Why do you think NONE of them have made a presence in this thread? There is absolutely no logical, practical, or even half way related to pu application to their idiocies. I already offered an example of their 'female counterparts'. It's the delusional, fat, loud mouthed, stinky-assed town whore who shakes their ass in your face and tells you that they are 'better than you'. If you're a 'nice guy', please help me out and give me a 'nice name' to call these fat delusional losers. While you're at it, I'm getting tired of calling these clowns 'village idiots'. If you have a nice way to describe the delusional clowns of the village, please let me know.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 2:09 am 
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Kasabi going ham on these junkies!! I agree with you. I think we need to be more humble and modest, while focusing on trying to get the girl in bed. (Or w/e your goal is) Instead of the mentality, "I'm the shit. I know you want to fuck me."

I also hear people say "rejections ain't shit!". This is true to a certain extent. You shouldn't let it take a huge blow to your gut. Instead, let it take a jab at your shoulder. See what you can improve on, or you'll be that dipshit running around getting rejected everytime b/c "it's the girl... not me... w/e".

EDIT: No wonder there's websitse like puahate. With the "I'm the shit. I know you want to fuck me" mentality, I can see why.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 4:59 am 
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So . . . this is the way you navigate through life? You see a smiley face and you do whatever they do?


Why do you think NONE of them have made a presence in this thread? There is absolutely no logical, practical, or even half way related to pu application to their idiocies. I already offered an example of their 'female counterparts'. It's the delusional, fat, loud mouthed, stinky-assed town whore who shakes their ass in your face and tells you that they are 'better than you'. If you're a 'nice guy', please help me out and give me a 'nice name' to call these fat delusional losers. While you're at it, I'm getting tired of calling these clowns 'village idiots'. If you have a nice way to describe the delusional clowns of the village, please let me know.
please point out to me where i stated i follow the smiley faces? i simply dont pay attention to the disgruntled little man that gets his shit in a knot because other people are trying to pick up women using a different approach. frankly i dont even know where these "village idiots" are. i dont see too many topics that support those philosophy's and the only ones that do pop up get 2 or 3 replies so they are as good as dead. that being said i dont lurk on the chat very much but you really cant control what non sense goes on in their.

i dont consider myself "a nice guy" i just realize that if you want to teach someone, you dont go about it by saying "YOUR DUMB, YOUR DUMB, IM RIGHT. CLOWN."

not to mention this idea was already stated by madals. except he actually gives you something constructive to work with

why-most-women-hate-the-idea-of-puas-th ... 86093.html

"approach, open, routine, close" is fucking ground breaking!! thank you kasabi for your o so amazing knowledge.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 5:30 am 
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it seems like your trying to alpha male everyone on the board by delivering your advice in a negative tone and it makes the actual message less meaningful. all im saying is that your message would be of more useif it was said in a constructive, helpful fashion rather than raw criticism.
No, not everybody. . . just a handful of village idiots that troll this forum tossing out filth to anybody willing to listen. You might lack some balls but you do know right from wrong. . . so do they.
Mr. Stinson's got some point here.

@kasabi, most of your threads that i've read are mostly either about what you shouldn't do or criticizing what others are doing.

I suggest you write a post on what people SHOUlD do. That would save a lot of time for everybody. If you've done so, send me a link, i'd love to see it.

i suggest every time, you criticize something you give people an alternative.

e.g. instead of saying 'i'm better than her" say "........"-That would more helpful.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 12:46 pm 
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"approach, open, routine, close" is fucking ground breaking!! thank you kasabi for your o so amazing knowledge.
Your sarcasm is the point. This is a pu forum. It doesn't take much and there is absolutely no need to play the village idiot role to pick up a few girls.
Quote:
i suggest every time, you criticize something you give people an alternative
I offered a few suggestions but it's difficult to pinpoint an 'opposite' of being the village idiot. You could be a bus driver, a 7-11 register boy, the smiley bum waves hello to everybody in exchange for quarters . . . you could be ANYTHING ELSE and you'd be a more attractive member of the society than the village idiot.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 4:09 pm 
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@Live Your Life:

You're the same as I got here. Couldn't understand anything what Kasabi was or is meaning with all these topics with his unavoidable criticism and pointers. The thing is - he is doing it the correct way. He's actually learning us a lot more then any other person on this forum. You need to learn this before you continue. I don't value Kasabi as the wisest man here, I value his opinion because he knows what he is talking about.

Regarding the fact of creating topics of what you should do.. Why? Why do we need to make topics like that, it's better to create topics about where you are and what you are doing right now - analyse, evualate and improve. There is no succes without those 3 tactics.

Kasabi is giving you the oppurtunity to not follow blindly the advice that is given to you, he's offering you criticism because you need to learn from it. There is no "you should do this" there is only "you should know this because that is what you do when you do that."

--> An action is only as powerful as the thinking behind it. Govern the thinking, and be excellent at the action.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2011 4:29 pm 
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Personally, I don't think that the 'inner game' topic even belongs in PU; just about everything I read in regards to inner game in the PU community is delusional guess work at best and psychotic habits at worst.
I think "inner game" definatly belongs in pick up, withought a decent amount of self confidence and self esteem picking up women is going to be very hard.

The majority of people who are here probably do have these problems so advice on dealing with it is essential. For sure some advice won't be great, but the majority of things I have read on these forums isn't "delusional guess work....psychotic habits..etc"

I agree that if anyone suffers from these problems, counceling and reading material from people very well knowledged on the subject could be more benificial.

Having said tha, tlot of the long standing members will have had related personal problems which they have gotten through so there advice is likely to have value in it.

No need to be that harsh on the whole communtiy just because there are a few morons giving and taking bad advice.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 10:56 am 
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I think "inner game" definatly belongs in pick up, withought a decent amount of self confidence and self esteem picking up women is going to be very hard.
Yes but you gain confidence by doing things. That's the 1st thing AFC Adam teaches : to be confident be competent. So why debate about it on a theoretical level when you can actually go, talk to girls, gain abundance and then you will just be confident. That's inner game. Yes, perhaps certain mistakes must be pointed out(it's called sticking points btw), but the level where it reached is waaay too far. People talk about mindsets they may never apply in their lives. People want to apply mindsets and they can't because the reality isn't congruent with what they want(ex confidence). If all the girls rejected you, how the fuck are you gonna act alpha ? What may help you is understanding your situation, then the reality may motivate you enough.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 11:25 am 
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I find the whole idea of "inner game" fairly amusing. There are guys in the chat who will say "I've been working on my inner game" - really? What have you been doing?

More than likely the reply would be "I've been reading this/I've read this".

Confidence is not gained by reading. Confidence books aren't like a computer programme you can just download into your brain. This isn't the matrix. Like kasabi said: affirmations are just delusional.

We know that confidence and assurance of oneself is gained through real world actions and experience. The only way to do that is to just man up. If you do that, then inner game doesn't really have a place in pickup - it's something you earn.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 12:01 pm 
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Confidence and self esteem are built by doing things, that goes without saying.

Inner game is not just theoretical, its also practical.

You have to get yourself out there to change.

But a better understanding of yourself, people, and the world around you, will help you deal with problems that you have.

Bad habbits and negative ways of thinking are hard to break, so advice on doing so, ways to go about it etc are good.

So of course reading and learning from others is a good way to work on yourself and help make changes. There is alot of good information on this site i have discovered, and ebooks from puas on these subjects which are also very good.

I don't think affirmations are are a dellusional way of self-improvement. If you are telling yourself "Im the god of all men and all must bow before me" yes that is delusional. but just picturing yourself doing well, thinking about yourself in positive ways is healthy.


Last edited by Marlon87 on Fri Apr 01, 2011 3:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 5:59 pm 
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No need to be that harsh on the whole communtiy just because there are a few morons giving and taking bad advice.
Seriously? LOL . . .Wouldn't you laugh your ass off if the neighborhood beggar told you that he'll teach you physics? Why is it so difficult for so many to understand that undereducated guys who practice pick up lines to target girls, suck face in bars, gain dates, etc . . . are in NO POSITION to be guiding you towards better neurological or psychological health? Can you think of members of the society who could be any WORSE at guiding you through emotional-psychological issues than PUA's? (By the way, there's nothing wrong with targeting girls and sucking face. . . and if this is what you want to learn, you're all in the right place.)

Hey, at least the commercial guys manage to make some $$ out of the scam. What's the deal with the retards who show up in these forums and copy/paste? LOL. . . this is hysterically sad.
Quote:
affirmations are just delusional.
The way that it's typically practiced in PU circles is delusional. How do you suppose anybody will ever obtain, "I am on Earth to satisfy all women?" . . ."I am better than all women". . . "Rejections are good" . . . This is delusional. . . especially if you're staring at the mirror image of a fat slob who's never done anything in life and is doing nothing about it other than reciting another pick up line.

When affirmations support actual steps towards realizable and tangible goals, affirmations can be very effective. To set dreams, workable goals, create daily tasks, AND THEN to tell yourself something like, "I am on my way . . .Today is the day . . . I am already ______ (personal dreams) . . . " this could be a positive influence.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2011 6:55 pm 
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No need to be that harsh on the whole communtiy just because there are a few morons giving and taking bad advice.
Seriously? LOL
yeah, generalising the advice of the whole community as delusional guess work and psychotic because of the bad advice of some members is just dumb.

Quote:
Why is it so difficult for so many to understand that undereducated guys who practice pick up lines to target girls, suck face in bars, gain dates, etc . . . are in NO POSITION to be guiding you towards better neurological or psychological health? Can you think of members of the society who could be any WORSE at guiding you through emotional-psychological issues than PUA's?

yeah everyone in this communitys a moron, that isn't capable of giving any advice, or worth listening too.

just keep looking down on people man.

Again you're are just making generalisations, i've read plenty of good stuff on these forums, and in books reccommended here. Yes there is bad advice out there but attribute that to the individuals not the entire group.

You should look outside here (therapy, specific websites on the subject etc) if you have confidence issues etc, but there is good advice here also from people who have/ have had similar problems.

Working on and solving these problems is definatly important to becoming good at pick up.

last im gonna post on this topic.


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