*DISCLAIMER*

Okay, I found out through making the wrong post that we're not supposed to talk about illegal things here, and I intend to respect that rule in this post.

However, I will be talking about people who formerly did illegal things, not to rock the boat intentionally, but because I feel this information is relevant because it gives background on the socialization process that led to what I'm about to ask advice on.

If I accidentally violate the rules in any way in this post then I am so sorry, and I swear I will never do it again, but I do hope that it at least stays up long enough for me to get the opinions I need on this situation.

Please don't ban me, I read the rules, and as far as I can tell this should be a (barely) legal post as it doesn't condone doing anything illegal, and any illegal actions it may reference offhandedly is water under the bridge.

*END DISCLAIMER*

As some of you may know from another post, I recently quit smoking weed (12 days going now). Finding this out, a recovering drug addict friend of mine invited me out to what I thought was just going to be a simple jam session (turns out we had both been teaching ourselves guitar for the past year).

My friend tricked me. We did get to jam out quite a bit, but his true intention was to take me to an NA meeting, where I met some new friends and was invited to a local venue to see my friend play guitar publicly. I never would have gone to one of these on my own ("You don't suck dick for pot!") so I'm glad he tricked me.

Went to the venue, had a good time. Turns out my friend who tricked me had gotten REALLY good at guitar in a short amount of time, and the fact that I was there with him kind of DHV'd me to the whole crowd.

At the venue in question I met more NA members, including the guy who taught him guitar, who he'd become pretty good friends with, and with whom he was performing that night. This is relevant because the target I'm about to tell you about doesn't know my good friend that well (outside of NA), but my good friend's friend does know her.

Everything went great! I wasn't there to game, I was just having a good time. My friend and I packed up and started to make our way out the door (he had to be home by a certain time so staying was a little out of the question). Shortly before we started to leave my new target, a solid HB8, walked in and started talking to the crowd I had been mingling with.

As we were on our way out, she walked up to me, introduced herself, and shook my hand. In a small way I took it this to be an IOI (should I have?).

As said before, I think I made a good impression on my friend's friends, but my friend didn't know the target that well himself. He did know her last name though, and she does have a facebook. I'm sitting here contemplating sending her a message because I sort of got that "wish you could stay longer" vibe from her smile, however; I'm not sure because I suck at reading people (sometimes I wonder if I got the Asperger's).

So, before I do anything, I'm asking you guys for advice pre-emptively.

Should I go ahead and add her as a friend, or should I send a message first?

If I send the message, what do you think I should say or avoid saying? Should I include my phone number in the message?

How best should I go about approaching this?

Anything you guys have to offer on this subject is valued. I think I'll wait a day or two to see what you guys have to say about this before I do anything on facebook. I'm planning to go to future NA sessions, so there's a chance I may bump into her offhandedly again in real life, but the problem is I don't know for sure whether she still goes to these or not (there weren't many people at the meeting tonight).

What advice would you guys give me before I take a shot at this?

A) Should have number closed. Hard to read the social setting from a FR but she did give you an IOI and that 'vibe'. I would have number closed and called/txted her within 5 minutes of her leaving to establish some rapport. Admittedly a long shot, but has worked for me before.
B) That's that happens when you smoke weed

C) On the upside you can hope to see her again and have the chance to game her properly

Found out she actually wasn't an NA'er, just tight with a couple of them.

I found out that what I thought was an IOI was actually an AI. (just now clicked what the difference was, lol, an IOI marks definite attraction after some chit-chat and an AI was what I got, right?)

So I won't be seeing her at an NA meeting afterall (so alot of that stuff turned out to be pretty irrelevant anyway).

Anyway, I said fuck it and decided to give it a shot, so here's a little effort at facebook game for you guys to criticize if you want.
So I sent this, and apparently she was online exactly when I sent it, and responded immediately. So before I even finished typing this post got the following back:
So I responded with this:
Still awaiting a response to that.

I don't like the fact that she said "I'd love to be your fb friend." Or am I reading too deep into that?

How could I have improved this discourse? By the way the venue in question is an Applebee's, where these dudes play guitar on Thursday nights.

Bump.

Having been thinking about this I think I already blew it, cause I asked a direct question in my last message but haven't gotten a response yet (and I know she was online to read it cause she confirmed my friend request). But that's okay! There's fifty million of her our there!

No criticism here though? I know those messages I sent are awful. I just couldn't come up with anything better and had to send SOMETHING.

Nevertheless, I think I'll be going to this place (it's an Applebees) Thursday. Going to be polite to her, but try to pick a different target and make her wonder why I messaged her and now I'm kind of ignoring her.