I can't believe I'm getting myself into this thread...

I think the reason you're seeing such a dichotomy with respect to the reactions of oneitis and marriage is, as was previously mentioned, the collateral damage of 'innocents'. Most people aren't going to have an issue with a single PUA closing on a bunch of girls if both parties are willing, no harm done.

However, if PU threatens the livelihood of children who are completely innocent and removed from the situation, then people get upset.

It's one thing to play a girl, have it go sour and she gets upset with you. It's something completely different when the situation blows up and for some kids to have their lives radically altered.

I've had a lot of friends deal with divorce when they were children and it was definitely not easy for them.

I was with one woman for twelve years, we had a child together, we bought a home together, we put supported eachother all the way from highschool through college (once for me, and twice for her). We were together through homelessness, poverty, and the chronic illness of our daughter. We never did technically marry. Care to guess why? I'll tell you...

because I actually have respect for that institution.

^ this is where you and I differ ^

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

you're wrong
one-itis usually is one sided, meaning you have an unhealthy obsession with someone who doesn't return it. If the feeling is mutual, then you have (when strong enough) love.

And what if you are too far deep in the rabbit hole what then? Do you think you can just stop? I doubt it. I think you should really take some time and think about this and think if you want to serious do this or not. Because no matter how little of a risk you take, what you loose is big.

Id suggest you reinvigorate your sex life with your wife, you appear to get sexual gratification from the excitement and danger factor or at least appear to rather than the deed itself, so why not talk to your wife about your fantasies (and hers) and get some roleplay on the go - pretending your cheating(meeting her in motels) or sex in public places - the usual risqué stuff that will push your buttons.

If your doing this because its simply dead in the bedroom department and I was in your shoes, I would talk about it with her or go see someone about it, if you dont want to loose your marriage, then you need to rectify this, because you are more than likely the normal 'cheater' - your not the 1 percentile you 'hear' about; what I mean by that is you will get caught, if the end result of that is acceptable then carry on if not you need to fix this.

I personally cant see how you can love your other half and do this knowing what harm it will cause,you either love and respect her, or deep down, truthfully you dont and you are subconsciously trying to end it via the use of an outside party.

what are the options available that I can see?

1) Talk to her about the problem and your needs, see if something can be done(swinger, roleplay etc).
2) Carry on until caught, deal with the fallout.
3) End the relationship and let her move on while she still can, if children are involved doing it early before they can understand, is better than the inflicted emotional trauma when they do.
4)Seek therapy, something is wrong if your happy to risk inflicting massive pain on your family.

You need to have a serious think about this, regardless and have a good look in the mirror and think about all the consequences of this. We dont know the details only you do so can only offer opinion not instruction,it's your decision in the end.

Thanks to OP for this thread. Really.

Here is why:

I've never been married and I'm single at the moment. The girl I like is in serious long-term, long-distance relationship. I really like her, but one of my rules was not to sleep with (or try to seduce) a woman in a committed relationship. However, I decided to "seduce" her to the best of my ability, in spite of my "code", but I changed my decision-all thanks to this thread.

I deeply believe that what you're doing is wrong. Desire is usually weakness. Men are horny creatures and often times its hard for us to be committed in long-term relationship. That's understandable-humans are inherently weak creatures.

But your case seems different to me. You're doing this not because you're horny(well that's one of the reasons but not the main one), instead, it seems that you're cheating just to cheat.

That's horrible IMHO.

I hope you don't mind if I use this thread as an example of what not to do.

why spend time and effort gaming when you could spend that time and effort improving your relationship with your wife and your overall state of life? if you're that desperate to game, then leave your wife. i bet your kids look up to you, imagine how they'll feel about you if you get caught (which you will eventually).

the so called highs of gaming other women is offset by the end result of a destroyed marriage and family. in life, plan for the worst case scenario, but look forward to the best. in your case, the only way to avoid the worst case scenario is to not cheat on your wife.

So I've been married and I can say that the urge to fuck other people will never go away, but real men are in control of their urges and don't act on it.

Just because other guys you know get some on the side doesn't mean that it's the right thing to do nor does it justify what you want to do.

Since your intentions are strong, I'd say you need to have a long hard look at yourself and think about why your family should be your first priority.

You made a promise to your wife when you married her to love her and be faithful to her. She's live by her promise so far, you have not.

Act with honour.