Quote:
i want this answered
As Mack said, this is an ineffective communication pattern. You may want to look at how you talk to people in general and see if you're pushing people away unintentionally by being too curt.
People LOVE to give advice and opinions. If you put people in the right frame of mind, they're always more than happy to help.
People HATE to be told what to do. If you tell people to do things for you, especially when you've offered nothing in return, they will have a natural tendency to react against it.
Compare what you said to this:
"Hey guys! I'm new here and I just want to say this forum is amazing! There's so much great info and tons of experienced guys, so I know there must be some really knowledgeable gamers out there who can help me with my problem. At the moment I'm opening sets during the day, but I can't figure out how to get them to stay longer than a few minutes? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!"
See the difference? By framing your question, you're asking for advice politely, rather than TELLING people to answer you and criticising them for not having answered sooner. Furthermore, you're asking the "knowledgeable" gamers to answer. That means, by answering your thread, the guy must be knowledgeable. Get it?
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To answer your original question:
First off, how are you opening? If you're asking for directions or something indirect like that, then they're far more likely to run off pretty quickly, unless you say something that'll hook them. After all, the frame of the interaction is - gimme this piece of info. Once they've given it to you, they have no reason to stay.
That's why I believe it's better to be direct from the beginning. If you tell a girl you think she's attractive, then it's obvious why you're talking. If she's interested, she'll be more likely to stick around, at which point you can do any or all of the following transition techniques:
i. Cold read "you strike me as a creative type"
ii. Fake / joke cold read "you work as a ninja assassin on weekends don't you?"
iii. Opinion opener "I was having this debate..."
iv. DHV story "so the the most random thing happened to me..."
v. Questions-as-statements "you're not from around here, I can tell
"
As for taking things further, I'm of the short-n-sweet camp - I like to go in confident and direct, have some light banter for just a couple of minutes, make sure she's not retarded or boring, and get the number and fuck off. Then I just get in contact the day after and set up a date where we can properly hang out and get to know each other. I have zero time for insta-dates, lunch dates, or anything that doesn't have the possibility of sex at the end of it. The whole interaction lacks direction, drive, energy and sexual tension unless there's that lingering thought in the back of both our minds about how far things are going to go that evening.
The only time that'll change is if we talk logistics and she's alone, totally free for a few hours, and is clearly quite up for it (mainly tourists). Then you can go straight to a coffee shop or something, and then back to your place. But you're gonna have to make sure you build lots of sexual tension on that insta-date, get her revealing her wild side to you, talk about sex, and generally get her in the mood. It's tricky, but not impossible.
In general, I also like to set up a date later because then they dress up, shave their legs and generally get sexy and get in a sexual mood before they see me. During the day they aren't expecting to be hit on and so you might not get them on top form.
CHAT
