That's the mindset I need to have. Got you. I was a bit provocative on the ex-gf boyfriend but I would like to understand why it is this way. Guess I'll figure out later. I accept it the way it is. Let's move forward.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Are you making fun of me Italian?

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Quick Update.

From Saturday to Wednesday, it will be Carnaval time in Brazil. Unfortunately, going to Rio is too expensive for me, so I'm staying in São Paulo. This has another consequence unfortunately:

Little Miss Sunshine is going to Rio, so she won't be able to go on date with me this weekend. Here's her text-message:
Guess I gotta be happy about it, she answered quickly and seems to really wanna see me. I answered some hours later (was busy posting).

No date this weekend though.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

DAY 48: making some friends.
Going out for a beer.

Context.
I had classes at the uni yesterday morning, most of the students were international so it was a good opportunity to build some relationships with some of them. I went to a bar at night to have with a beer a Canadian friend.

Addressed issues.
- I have no real circle of friends for now.
- I'm not comfortable in night game/bar environment.

Strategy.
It's a bit strange to rationalize all this but I think that if I want to make some real friends, I need to see them out of the university.

Goals.
- See some friends outside the university!
- Have fun.
____________________________________________________________________

I've recently met a Canadian guy from Montreal (he speaks French). He was on classes yesterday morning and we have some fun together. We decided to go get a beer at night.

The afternoon at uni.
But let's do things in order. Before going to have a beer with the Canadian buddy, I went at the university in the afternoon. I thought I had classes, but I did not in the end. The Carnival holidays started yesterday at noon. I was a bit lost so I asked two students (not HB) about the fact that there was nobody in the classroom. They explained to me and since I opened them with my classic "Do you speak English?" they understand I was an exchange student. "Oh you're the French one?". They were also in my classes and noticed me.

I went to the bus stop right after meeting them and opened a beautiful 18/19yo HB8. Unfortunately, the bus arrived 5 minutes after... so I did not have time to number close. Anyways, I think it's good to know more and more people at the faculty.

Going out for a beer.
So I went to a nice bar with my new Canadian friend. I invited the Colombian HB since she lives near the place. But she couldn't make it in the end. No worries. We were two guys speaking French surrounded by Brazilians. At some point we decided to meet some people. I opened the table next to us. 3 Brazilian girls. One HB5, 2 HB8. "Do you know a cool place around here to learn samba? We would like to learn to dance it." . We spoke for 30/45 minutes straight and I was good at maintaining the conversaton flowing. Some key elements:
- They were 30yo and more! (they look 25).
[edit:- I asked one of them to guess my age, she gave 27yo.]
- They were PhD in Biology from the same university.
- One of them was going to Paris, I gave her some advice.
- I KINOed the one that was going to Paris this summer.
- ... (a lot happened but I was not really gaming them since they were 30yo and more, I was just being friendly.)
I did not number close but I gave them my name so they can add me on Facebook. Again, i just wanted to be friendly and get more comfortable in this kind of environment.

Results: I had fun with my friend (I'm seeing him today) and I even approached in a bar environment.
____________________________________________________________________

On the strategy.
Seeing the Canadian dude out of university really helped when it comes to building friendship. I really had fun yesterday night. I even drunk 1,5 liters of beer even though I don't like that. I just enjoyed it. I want to get back to that bar more often now.

On the Game.
- I'm getting comfortable in a bar environment: I had fun and was able to open a 3 set.
- I overcame the logistics issue to go to the bar.
- I'm starting to know nice places to go out in São Paulo.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Eaee Daniel

Night game at the bars, especially in Brazil, is THE best - in my opinion. At bars and pubs, women aren't as stuck up as the ones you find at the clubs. Yes, they are a bit older but why not go for it ?? a 30yo HB8 taking you home wouldn't be too bad right ?? Maybe it's not your thing, but those 25 - 30 yo women, as I would say in portuguese, "elas estao pelo crime", which means that most of the time you end up taking them home, or they take you to their place.
Next time you go to a bar, give it a try dude. There's 2 reasons why they are having drinks at the bar.

1. Celebrating an occasion with friends - those are usually in groups of 3,4,5,6 and aren't usually there to meet guys.
2. They are there meet guys (easy F-close) those are usually a couple of HB - they tend to be very receptive.

That's basically what I got from my bar game experience back home...I used to go at least once a week have beer with my buds - I'm still trying to figure out the bar game here in Canada haha

I already miss having a few liters of chopp at the bar with my buddies back home hahaha try Brahma chopp and Stella Artois chopp...It's heaven.

You're soooo right Gringoz. The bar was a perfect place yesterday. I saw a lot of "only girls" table. I need to go back as often as I can to be really comfortable on those kind of environment! They are 30yo but look like 24! Plus, they actually thought I was 27 at the beginning!

I find a new playground!

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

DAY 48: going to the mall with Colombian HB.
All the strange things.

Context.
Do you remember the Colombian HB? I saw her at the party on day 43 21-vt81510.html?postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=304 and #-closed her. My game was weak though, I was not funny and chatted about boring things with her. I was so bad that I did not even consider her as a target despite the fact that I like her. Anyways, I tried to make her come to the bar yesterday. She could not and sent me a message. Since I was supposed to see my Canadian friend today at the mall, I invited her. Here's what I wrote about her on DAY 43:
Addressed issues.
- Escalation is not an habbit yet.
- I have no clue how to behave on a date.
- I have no real circle of friends for now.

Strategy.
- Asking her if she can come early to the mall to be alone with her.
- Escalate (KINO, sexual tension...)

Goals.
- Build a relationship with her: get to know one each other better.
- Get to see her again.
- Build attraction.
____________________________________________________________________

I've met 30 minutes before the appointment with the other guys. I asked her if she wanted to eat with me at the mall but she prefered to eat at home. So here I was, in front of the Starbucks at 3.30pm.

At Starbuck's
She came to me and kiss my right cheek, grabbed her waist and did the same (São Paulo's way to say hello). We started to talk about general stuff: which language we should talk... bla bla. We took the direction of the rendez-vous point and I was thinking about taking her to Starbuck's but since we had only 20 minutes ahead of us, I was hesitating.

Interestingly, she proposed to go to Starbuck's. She wanted a coffee. So here I was, alone with her in a Starbucks. I applied the basics:
- Body Language: relaxed, lean back, I was not totally turned to her, even when we sat.
- Eye-contact: I maintained it often, but keep the 80/20 rule.
- Push&Pull: I gave her attention but looked away at some moments. I wanted her to earn my attention.
- KINO: I KINOed her arm, her knee and the lower part of her back.

Key elements:
- We had a general chat on São Paulo, her work... nothing interesting here: I've got some info though.
- We started to speak about Europe/Paris: played the passion/French card here.
- Since I took a chocolate muffin, I gave some to her and we started to speak about chocolate (money word): I played the French card, and did a bit of sexual frame: "orgasm to me!"
- I told her Brazilian guys were pushy (German HB told me that) and that they could learn some stuff from French guys: she smiled.
- I noticed her jeans were from Diesel. I asked her what she thought about the way Brazilian guys dress. Fashion question. She did not really react on that.

Since it was 16.15pm, we left the Starbuck's to the rendez-vous point.

Meeting the Canadian and Italian dudes.
They were not at the rendez-vous point. The was a bench so we sat together. This time, I turned my body on her direction and put my arm on the back of the bench. She had her left feet underneath her beautiful ass. We spoke about cinema and told her we should go together. She agreed . I focused on maintaining the pressure with eye-contact.

My friends came, she did not know them. We went back to the Starbucks to speak about what to do for the Carnaval break. We're planning to go to Ilha Bela, a paradisiac island near São Paulo.

Since the Italian guy and I needed to buy some stuff, we went to the supermarket with the Colombian HB and the Canadian dude. We did not find what we were looking for. The Italian wanted to left, so did the Canadian guy. But I opened my damn mouth... "So you're leaving me alone with Colombian HB?" Why so studid? The Canadian dude offered to stay a bit more. We walked in the mall during 30 minutes and then he left.

All the strange things.
So here I was with this cute brunette in the mall. She wanted to shop and I knew it would not be a good thing to go shopping with her. I did not really know what to do. I knew it was not a good thing to spend too much time with her, I would run out of things to say and be boring.

Truth is, some really strange stuff happened today. I dunno why but she decided to show me the cinema: "Ow you want me to show you the cinema"... Well, I did not say so but that sounded good actually! "yeah, for sure". We went there, there were a lot of people. I took the program and told her again that we'll go for a movie. I was clumsy on this one but well. Asked her if there was a cool movie currently, she told me about Black Swan. I told her I've already see it. Why so stupid again!? Anyways, I asked her if it was still in the cinemas here. Something strange happened again. My Spanish is getting bad because of the Portuguese, but here's what she answer:
HER - Ow you wanna go to the cinema now?... [She looked confused/embarassed but also hesitating to accept the invitation I did not make]
ME - what?
ME - I did not say that.
HER - There's a lot of people today you knwo... [wtf?]
I did the claw on her and made her understand what I really meant.

Getting an ice cream.
I started to be really boring... did not know what to say. I wanted to leave the mall but had to do the conversation until the exit. Since she's been in São Paulo for 6 months, I started to ask her about the ice-cream place I was supposed to go with Little Miss Sunshine. I just asked if it was good... Again... "ow you wanna go there". So we went there (it's a chain like Ben&Jerry's). I bought an ice-cream. She looked bored so I actually told what was on my mind: "are you bored?". She answered that she did not know what to do with the Carnaval break. I offered some ice-cream, she did not want it. We spoke again about language and shopping. I asked her if she went to the shopping mall near my house. Said no. Another reason to take her out.

I kiss her goodbye and told her we'll stay in touch.

Results: I planned my Carnaval break, had fun with other exchange students and spend some time with Colombian HB. I've planted some seed to see her again: cinema and shopping center next to my house.
____________________________________________________________________

A last strange thing.
Among the 700+ pictures she has on Facebook, she has some with a German boyfriend! He's not in Brazil anymore but I can tell they're still together since she's planning to go to Germany. I dunno. Am I inventing stuff in my mind? Am I seeing IOIs where there is none? Don't get me wrong. That was not a date to me, but I had so much IOIs...
All that makes me want to ask a simple question: what's a date in the end? I mean I feel stupid you know. I tried to be as attractive as I could, did some KINO, hugged her and all, told her we should go to the cinema together... I thought I have some options here... lol. That's a joke. I feel like I get satisfied for nothing. Anyways, I'm lost. What the hell do I need to do to actually make something happen? I'll see LMS after Carnaval... How to get her understand that it is a date?

On the strategy.
It was a good idea to actually try to make her come a little before the others. We've spend some time together and I think she enjoyed it. I did. I tried to escalate as much as I could but it's not a habbit yet... I did some KINO, been funny, maintained eye contact... but well I was a bit stuck at some point... did not know what to do... Some routines would have helped me, but I just did not think about it!

On the game.
- Planting seeds to get to see your target again is powerful.
- I have to avoid at any price to become boring.
- It was a good date practice.

Questions to move on.
- What's a date? How to slide from a simple "hanging out" to a "date"? I don't want to fall in the friend zone with my next targets.
- How to avoid to be boring?
- Should I be direct? "You know what, let's make this a date."
- Shoudl I be more sexual? That would make things clear about my intentions.

Kasabi's metaphore was really good. I think that to make things clear I need to go from the outer circles to the center. If I had been good at it, she would have stopped me today since she has a boyfriend. I don't know what to do to escalate in practice. Hopefully I had this experience... It would have been sad to waste a number close because of that. This is so AFC.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Good shit nigga keep it up

_________________

"We Go Truly Hard, Styles Like Julia"-Hoodie Allen

Thanks Hobbit, I'll take a look at that later.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

DAY 49: the joke goes on.
Feeling ridiculous.

Here I am again, in front of my keybord, journaling. But this time, it's different. I have a glass of Martini right next to my computer and while I'm drinking it, I'm trying to figure out what's happening with me and how to tell you about this new development in my humble journey.

But first of all, I would like to apologize to you, readers. I've been writing a lot things lately, giving too much information for you to react. Even if this journal is Don't worry, I won't do it anymore, this post is the end of the chapter. I'm taking a break. I need it.

You know the story.
If you're following since the beginning, most of you already know how I got into the Game. I've been in a two years relationship with a girl that went to the USA to get a MBA. Four weeks after being there, she sent me an e-mail telling me that it was over. Truth is, I was okay with it... Since she got there, I had almost no news, and when I had some... nothing like "I miss you" or "I love you". Actually, I even hesitated to break-up with her several time during our relationship. I have never been in love with her... Yet I truly cared about her. Our relationship ended end of September. Last time I spoke to her, and actually saw her, it was in July. She did not even say a proper goodbye to me. That hurt. End of November, I've learned that she was with a 27yo guy from his university.

Why am I still talking about that? Am I not over it? That's not even the question here. I've learned something new and I want to take the opportunity to evict all that story from me.

Something is new.
We are in March right now. She might have been with him for 6 months. I've learned today that she is engaged to him.

You should be happy for her!
Should I? I'm not happy at all. I've been here for her for 2 years, I've been that nice guy, buying expensive gift for her, making massages... I did not even have a proper goodbye from her, no gift for my last birthday, she did not even have the courage to break up with me when she had the opportunity to see me. I just received a e-mail. Nothing more. No Merry Christmas. No Happy New Year. Truth is, I think I won't see her ever again. But you already know that story as well right? I know it too now. I understand it. I accept it the way it is. But there's something I can't hide: I'm not happy for her.

Am I the bad one here?
I'm not happy for her, I don't want her to get engaged... I want her to feel as miserable as I feel sometimes. I should not (according to Zen Principles). But in the end, the joke is that now, I am the one who feel bad for not wishing her the best. In the end, I'm the bad one. Let's sum up. She left for the US without saying me a proper goodbye, she did not even offer me a gift for my birthday, she did not even tried to call me for my birthday, she left me with a e-mail after being one month there, some weeks later, I found out she's dating a guy. It's not over, she gives me no news and now I learn that she's engage to a guy she's been dating for 6 months. But I am the one who feel bad now. I'm the one the Dark Side is calling now.

How would the real man I want to become should react to that? I should be happy for her right?

How I feel? Ridiculous.
Please read carefully here. I'm not angry while I'm writing this post. But, I feel like I've been used for two years, I feel like she's never really cared for me... I feel like I'm the one the joke is on. Okay, I'm exagerrating here... Am I? I don't know. You know what's worse than hate? Indifference. But I do think that I deserved better than all that. Don't you think? (please tell me if you think I'm wrong).

I'm not angry, maybe I will be... Truth is, I'm way less frustrated thanks to meditation, I'm handling it, proudly. Yet I'm tired of all this. I feel miserable and ridiculous. I've been being happy about approaching 20yo teenagers, getting their number, trying to get dates... I feel ridiculous. It's been 6 month now, 49 days of game, I'm still single and still thinking about that. Last time I had sex? June. It's been eight months, almoast a year. So yes, I feel ridiculous. She's getting laid and even married... I'm getting numbers of 18yo girls, trying to get some friends and doing meditation. LOL, everybody laughs.

Please, understand that I don't feel sad... I just feel ridiculous.

Taking a break.
I think I needed to evict all that from me. Now it's done. I'm letting it go. Finally (or at least I'm hoping so). I'm taking a break. I'm leaving São Paulo to Ilhabela tomorrow, a paradisiac island. I won't update this journal for some time. "Hey AFC Daniel! Are you quitting?" No I'm not quitting. I'll keep up on my miserable journey but I need a small break, I'm tired.



Next step.
I've already prepared a post to look back on my journey and all the improvements that I've done. Approaching has helped me a lot, but I must not forget about the other solutions to my blocking points. I'll post it when I come back.

Thanks for following me guys. See you in the next chapter.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

I think she sounds like a bitch. I wont give my opinion on what i think of your situation because i dont think im experienced enough in bad break-ups but she sounds like a born-bitch. (i hope this doesn't offend you)


Although i will say that i don't think you have to wish them well.

_________________
"You don't want girls to think you suck dick at fucking pussy"
-Seth (Superbad)

@shahanshah No offence but she is not.
You hit hard Hobbit... and at the same time, you have the precision of a sniper.

I wanted to tell you that it is not that simple... but in the end, it is actually. It took you one sentence to turn that upside down. At least, I got rid of that burden. Good things for the rest of my journey.

Thanks for slapping me when I need it.

Sincerely, AFC Daniel.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Hey daniel. Had to reply. She's your oneitis man. It's gonna hurt. At the end of the day we all do our best to manage our emotions, try to think rationally to move forward. Pick- up helps. Hold your head high man. Shit i dont think mu realise how much of a freakin god you are on this forum. So many number closes in the day! I for one feel so uplifted by your journey and motivates me on my own. Good luck, but i'm sure we'll talk again.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

dude I have been following you since day one, I am impressed by your growth in the game but I always suspected that you would burnout at sometime. I am not here to pull you down or anything but I do understand where you are coming from. If you remember at one time I also started a journal but quickly abandoned it. This was because although I could open and use those routines my inner game was messed up. I believe this is what happened to you. You worked on everything else and became good at it but you neglected one important thing...your ex!! All I can say is dont give up now but carry on. If you want to know how I dealt with it pvt msg me. Now I can work game just by being me. No need to use many tricks. I am not an expect as you know but I survived what you are going through now. Dont take a break from PUA because its more of self development than laying girls. Just change your mindset from doing it for getting the girls to you being a better you. I hope for the best for you bro!

_________________
I'm a predator I dont make pets out of my prey!

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines." - Robert Schuller

Do not take a break because some stuff isn't falling the way you want or expected to. Quit if you actually have nothing to "learn" anymore. Why take a break? These are the times that you can actually learn the most my friend.
Good that you realise the bold fact here. It's good that you know this - it's step for taking care of the issue. You'll get there.
Don't be like this - there is no need to. You maybe feel frustrated or dissapointed, or even miserable. But never wish something bad for somebody else, no matter the person. It's your anger and frustration that is manifesting into negative points.
Be happy is something you decide for yourself. You can be indifferent about it, be happy, be sad. But never feel frustrated or miserable. It's better to be indifferent about the entire situation that your anger take over your judgement.

"Fear leads to the dark side" - Yoda.

Your fear here is the ability of not understanding. And it does lead you to the dark side - the frustration & miserable side.
You're EXACTLY like I was after my ex-gf dumped me.

Everybody deserves the best out of it, sometimes it just isn't the way it is ment to be.
Learn to accept it - learn to live with it & eventually you'll grow from it.
Now you're using your miserable state to make you even more miserable. You're actually adjusting your mindset to being disgusted about yourself. Why? There is nothing wrong with the intention of approaching people, no matter the age or sex.

My friend, you are a great guy. Stop giving into your miserableness.

Do realise that the following things are being applied to you.
- You have learned to analyse and act accordingly to different situations.
- The power of acknowledging mistakes & adjusting them to the right actions. This
mostly takes YEARS for the general population on earth.
- In the last months, I've never seen someone so enthousiastic about this as you
have been, it would be a real bad thing if you actually take this break.

I'll miss you brother, get back soon.

≠ LD

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