Yeah this is my first post, and sorry but its a long one. I've read through the site and instead of jumping in with questions i thought i'd get all this shit off my chest, let you guys know where im at. I have so much to say, some give a small back story mines prob not much diffrent to everyone elses but this is going to be good for me, telling strangers on the net how im getting my old self back. Maybe it'll just make flaming, criticising, comment and hopefully helping easier.

Its all happend so fast, last year was a bad one i guess lost alot and gained some. Lost my job, GF good friends took her side ect, working two jobs to keep afloat, i was a social person, while i wasnt (i realise now) i felt i was stripped if everything that made me me and it hurt, the people around me cared but didn't know what to do, they'd take me to a club but i'd stand in the corner for 10 and bail. All i wanted to do was work, watch TV and ride bikes with my flat mate mick, a guy that could have verry will changed my life.
But im getting ahead of myself.
A few weeks ago i had an interesting conversation at 3am with mick, we were both tired i hadn't slept in nearly two days and mick was coming down off all the JD he's drank the night before. We were playing COD when casually he asked if he could ask me a personal question, most people would have just asked, he just wanted to talk in confidence. (farrk getting ahead of myself again....)

Mick: We met in high school a few years ago, we were from two verry diffrent groups of people i played football, he sat in library reading comic books and playing gameboys but we clicked like... (google twitch and scummy), i looked after him, he is my brother and i am his. introduced him to girls, took him to parties but he was always in the background, never really got along or probably just didn't have a common intrest with anyone and he's exactly the same to this day. (so back to the story lol)

He asked me what i was doing with my life, i told him pay bills go back to a normal work week, hang out and ride bikes. But that wasnt what he meant and we both knew i just dodged the question, "you used be everyones best friend, i dont know how you made the time for everone, ive always loved you for that but what are you doing" i was shocked, well i knew he was right but he actually said it. I tried dodging it with your right but what are you getting at. He reminded me that he only ever had one girlfriend and he didn't really like her and he just did it because that the best he thought he could do. Now i absolutely pissed myself when he walked out with a copy of the game and rules of the game, but he who laughs last laughs loudest right.
He wanted my help, with the 30 day challenge he just wanted me to push him like i did in highschool. I thought there was no way in hell any of this "shit" would work but he made me read "the game" it was a moment of self realisation and clarity... i was a mess so i decided to do it with him instead of helping in hopes of getting my old self back. After reading some other ebooks he'd downloaded, we agree'd the firste step was harcuts and some new clothes.

So i guess this is our day one?
Off we go to the shopping center and i was actualy feeling pretty good, i went and got some jeans and a shirt the HB7 blonde sales assistant had me try on half a dozen shirts and probs just wanted a look lol, but i was mumbling, talking fast and just wanted to get out of there pacing my palms were sweaty and i didn't know what to say. I realised my problem there and then i'd been in a relationship so long i was so used to not really wanting to pick up, so i was always confident, didn't care what people thought ad if they were unimpressed so be it. But thats not the case now is it, this is by far my biggest problem i care what people think. Once we got mick dressed in probably the second most expensive set of clothes he's ever worn. hehe i tried to hook him up with the guy that worked there just to let off some steam and clear the nerves.
We walked around with nervous smiles for an hour saying hi to HB's, as soon as they'd smile and say something our eyes were straight at the floor, we were a mess. This is going to be alot harder than i thought if we're gonna work our way up to PUA status but it was a start.

So while i have the time im just going to write, i'll just keep going until i get up to date and then i'll probably move over to reports?

We booked in at salon for harcuts, the next day yet another orkward situation im used to barbers but the one i use is more a sheep sheerer than barber and a walk out looking like just enlisted in the marines or something. So we found a place full of HB's calles Destiney's. Micks idea was they'd have a ball playing with a blank canvas end he was fidgeting all night with anticipation and suggested we come up with some exercises, i was getting hooked probably not so much on the PU thing just the distraction. We came up with each others goals for the next day.
Mick's a smart guy he figured if i could just tell people the first thing that came to my head id get over my AA, didn't matter who they were or what it was just say it. Mine was boring and basically just saying hi to HB's.
I cant remember all the conversation we had that night, we drank too much and spent all night talking and convincing each other that we can do this without being nervous wrecks, and that yeaterdays hour make a huge diffrence. We decided that we'd fly solo so we wouldnt have a crutch and really get rid of the AA problem by making it as hard as possible.

I actually really enjoyed it i got an awsome haircut, the girl in there was great ok we were customers but che sent me home with some hair wax and showed me how to do my har properly and look after it. Mick was struggling a bit, even though she'd have been hb5 she kept us both talking and got me confident, i thanked her for the conversation... she looked at me funny but anyway.
so off we go im not big on the openers just yet but i thought id try the "hi can i get a quick opinion" and wing it with the first thing that came to my head. so...

me: Hey can i get a quick opinion, (i went blank but held a semi confident smile) oh nevermind you wont be able to help.
HB8: ohh, no come on what is it.
me: (weak lol) nah its fine.

After that i went back to hi's to everyone.
Mick got in a few openers, we still didn't even get close any numbers though, sitting in the car on the way to subway we were at a crossing in carpark waiting for some old people and a HB7 waits for us to go mick looks and mumbles "the naught naught naught naught things id like to do to you" and waves her across, beleive me i dont have a fucking clue what i was thinking but i wound down the window trying to hold back laughter and said those exact words as she walked past loud enough for her to hear. I dont know why but but it was funny as hell, and i didn't care she had a giggle and kept eye contact... wow that wasnt so bad, if i can say that and get a smile maybe im just over thinking. So i decided to use the 3 second rule after reading about it on here.

Getting half way through this now i've just thought of something, PU pulled apart and simplified really is just one big self confidence exercise.
I've got a little further since this all happend, i can hold a conversation and a smile and i look forward to weekends. Im still AFC as hell but im having fun, this isn't a review or a testimonial. Its just me sharing. Even though i just signed up and i know none of you im looking forward to sharing my failures more than my success and maybe actually adding something constructive.