getting used by women



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 Post subject: getting used by women
PostPosted: Sat Feb 12, 2011 6:29 pm 
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Member of MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Dec 27, 2010 9:42 pm
Posts: 101
I feel there is something horribly wrong with my game but i dont really see the solution.

Usually i get the girls i want, so no real problems in establishing connections or scoring. Only thing is im not really in to those one-night things (turning 30).

I always treat my girls really nice (pampering), but for some reason this seems to have and adverse effect: last few relationships my girls really started taking everything for granted and SPAM im once again in this situation.

I found a really nice girl that has a lot going for her, nice and smart; really pretty, outgoing, ... Been together for about two weeks but now im starting to notice this one hasnt even spent a single penny on me and seems to be content enjoying the ride (no real initiative).

And that is how it usually goes for me: Meet girl, target girl, take girl home, try really hard to make girl happy, notice little return, lose intrest, dump girl ...

Anyone any thoughts on how i can change this situation (any tests to see if this one means business?) and any tips for the future so that these women would actually do something for me.

grtz

darrryll


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Feb 12, 2011 6:56 pm 
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Joined: Sun Sep 26, 2010 6:52 pm
Posts: 7
Yahoo Messenger: dachozengeneral
AOL: kangchozenwun
Location: Vestaburg, PA
Stop pampering them for starters. If you jump through her hoops anytime she presents one to you then you should expect to be used. I think that's the major problem. What it sounds like to me is that you're too nice, you end up being a friend more than a boyfriend but because you are too nice and willing to give them everything they stick around and get what they can out of you.

And you said "try really hard to make girl happy". Don't do that, if you want a relationship that lasts you shouldn't have to try hard to make someone happy, the happiness should be there. Just spending time and being with you should make them happy at first.

Lastly the relationship has to come naturally, I don't believe people fall in love quickly. For a one night stand you can make her love you in a short time long enough to get you laid but a relationship type of love doesn't just happen overnight, and it seems that what you're doing is trying to force a relationship. You have to be the aggressor but at the same time you have to be willing to walk away at any time and allow her to chase after you.


As for your current girlfriend does she talk about things involving the future? Kids, marriage, getting a bigger house, etc...? Doesn't have to be directly toward you but just in general, if so then that's a pretty strong sign she wants to stick around.

Does she contact you first when you're not together?
Does she enjoy being affectionate out in public with you?
Next time you're going out slide it in somewhere that she's paying.

If you're going to continually expend your funds and time any time she wants you to then the cycle of being used will continue. Try other things to bring excitement into the relationship, they could be getting bored quickly if all you do is buy them things trying to make them happy.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 13, 2011 6:25 pm 
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Mr. Nemo

Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 8:18 am
Posts: 3102
Location: OC, California
Quote:
I always treat my girls really nice (pampering), but for some reason this seems to have and adverse effect: last few relationships my girls really started taking everything for granted and SPAM im once again in this situation.l
I think you have your answer to your problems. :wink:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2011 4:47 am 
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Joined: Mon Feb 14, 2011 2:47 am
Posts: 186
you have "Mr. Nice Guy" disease

"try really hard to make girl happy, notice little return"

I've made every mistake there is to make, I'm not preaching, I'm telling it like it is.

How you attract the woman in the first place is extremely important. You have to be attracting them with your personality and your personal style, like body language, clothes, etc. She needs to just like you as you appear right then, not knowing if you even have a job or a car. reinforce this by NOT offering to buy drinks or pay for anything. If she loses interest, all that happened is you saved money and time, on to the next one.

You can't have a scarcity attitude, like "i need to hang on to this one, she has blah blah". No in reality there are hundreds more just like her in your city, you just have not met them yet. Don't get attached to a false image in your head. It takes about 90 days to have any idea what a person is really like, don't even be "dating" until then. I have a friend who tells them they are on "90 day probation" and it makes them like him more.

The masculine polarity pushes for initial contact , sex, and makes all the decisions about activities, and assumes "I am the prize". Whoever pushes for a "relationship" or "are we dating yet?" kind of stuff must be the feminine. If the man does that, he loses his masculine polarity, and his sexual intensity, and is boring, and becomes a doormat, and gets used and abused. happens every single damn time, no exaggeration. If a woman ever calls you "nice", you are done.


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