20, student, frustrated at how i never get any attention



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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 8:05 pm 
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Mr. Nemo

Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 8:18 am
Posts: 3102
Location: OC, California
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(from girls).

I go clubbing often, I try to improve my style, I try to be positive, smile, try to be confident, but it never gets me anywhere.

And what really kills me is when I go clubbing, like last night, and see so many of the girls getting with guys, and then there's just me dancing with some friends, and I never get girls coming up to me and dancing with me.
I know guys are supposed to make the first move but I'm just not ready for trying and failing and getting rejected.

Please help :(
You almost sound like a friend of mine. I told him girls are giving him attention but the thing is he isn't looking because he too busy looking at other girls. Look around you and I bet your ass there be a girl or two trying to get your attention.
I'm going clubbing again tonight, I will be peacocking by wearing some crazy stuff hopefully as its an underwear party (as in wear underwear on top of normal clothes, lol) and I really hope this will be the night I even just get some dances or kisses with girls.
Why are you desperate for attention?


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 9:39 pm 
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MPUA Forum Addict
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Joined: Sun May 09, 2010 11:02 pm
Posts: 247
Location: London
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Look for girls looking at you. When they look in your direction, hold eye contact with them and smile. Due to a wonderful trick of evolution, we know when eyes are pointing at us: if you look at them and smile, they'll notice you.

If they look a second time, it's probably on. More so if they smile.

Also note that shifting the eyes sideways generally shows lack of interest, looking downwards shows interest.
I've never ever had a girl hold eye contact with me in a club, let alone smile. So that can't be the solution.

_________________
"I'd tell her to go shove her face in the pig pen, and go out and find another one who'll kiss you without askin for the earth. You're bound to find one. You can hardly throw half a brick back in the lands you come from without hittin one."
Stardust


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 9:51 pm 
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MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Jun 03, 2010 5:31 pm
Posts: 87
Every "Pickup guru" and every guy that has success with women has gone through this stage of being rejected. that's just the start of it. in order to become better, you have to get rejected, that's part of being confident


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 10:49 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 10, 2011 9:44 pm
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It's imperative that YOU approach girls at the club! I used to be really shy, a typical wallflower at clubs. The people you go with play a huge part in this, make sure you go with someone whos motivated or you'll fizzle out real quick.

The way I see it, the club has 3 types of guys, chumps who spend the whole night staring at girls (the majority), guys that are already there with girls/or only speak to girls they know and guys that approach girls, one after the other. You only really notice how many chumps there are until you become a member of the third group, after which you realize how futile it is to wait for girls to come up to you...


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 10:49 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 8:50 pm
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Location: Sweden, stockholm
i can totally relate to this i have the exact same issue, i'll soon be going on a nightcruise with my mates so i'll start moving up from there, tell me how it goes for you :)


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 5:55 am 
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Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2011 5:49 am
Posts: 242
Location: USA
agreed there is no "magical moment" in your life and there will never be quite that moment you lead yourself to believe to make the move. It is up to YOU to create that moment then have fun with it.

when i was younger i always thought to myself in school dances i'm going to wait for this and this to happen and for everything to be right... well guess what? it never happened and I never got anymore. Till one day i felt particularly brave just got behind a girl and started dancing. She looked behind her smiled and we danced for a bit.

at the time it was a monumental step forward, but it goes to show that taking the initiative and taking that risk something happened because I made it so. After that I wasn't afraid to go up and dance with girls did I get rejected? yes a few times (was really early into my training) but I also did dance with more girls.

you have to be able to break out of your comfort zone even if it's little by little everyday. whenever a friend comes to me for advice i tell them "what have you been doing so far? with no results. You don't want to do the same thing you have ALWAYS been doing. Do the complete opposite even if it's only for a little bit of time". Once people let go of their inhibitions they are more confident and that is when they start to run game.


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