hey man,what you have here is a typical relationship where a guy loses his power and thus loses the girl.you seem to have large amounts of feelings for her,which makes you not so strong.
She always tries to test you to see whether you regained your alpha posture and find that you didnt.and thats because you have strong feelings for her(not love).and I will tell you that its possible to flip the situation 180 degrees.and the studying and working thing is not true.its true to certain degree,but if she is attracted to you the way she used to be she will definetly find time for you.at least she would have texted you every now and then.
when a girl finds that she can affect a guy even a little bit she wll lose interest.
so the way you can flip this is by using the small time you will talk in the future to your advantage.maybe she will call you to give you your stuff.here is where you will gain control.
first dont initiate contact with her from now on.
-have the attitude that your happy whatever.
- be very short and to the point with her as if you have more important stuff to do.
- dont act as if you want everything back when you talk to her .tell her you just want
her to be happy.
-tell her that you found it good the way you are now.
-end the talking first .
-whenever she acts in way she is giving you hope(its a test) that you'll be together dont jump into it but act as if it takes time to think about it.
-show her your really willing to walk away.
-be really willing to walk away because maybe your situation is damaged so bad and cant be corrected
-stop thinking about her all the time it weakens you.
-realize that it may take her a year to be attracted to you again.
-when you see her tell her that you changed so many things in your life that you started to see things in a different way.(which gives her the dought that your not into her anymore)
-advice her to date new guys to gain experiance(this one is a killer)
-and lastly go gaming again to have the experiance to know when your not in control.
imo she is really a nice girl because she is trying to tell you that shes not attracted to you by telling you she is busy.and sorry for my rudness but you need to wake up so you'll be released.

gordon gekko,

Sorry to hear about this, man. There is no easy way to go through one of these kinds of break-ups.

My only words of advice...

Don't burn the bridge. If you aren't ready to see her in two weeks, just tell her politely that it will hurt you. And don't worry about being "alpha"... this isn't a conspiracy against you. But you know that already.

_________________
- Lux et Veritas -

Bro, with all honesty and no means for disrespect, you are confused. You aren't sure what you want...ask yourself and be honest and then do just that...either game to get away from her or do your thing with her...it's a choice that only you can make.

We can help with what you can try to do...but we can't change what she feels.

Now, It seems like she is confused as well and if you both are, then that is a recipe for uncertainty that will continue to lead to misunderstanding, confusion, heart ache. I do wish you the best though.

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You can't make the same mistake twice, the second time you make it, it's no longer a mistake, it's a choice.

Hi guys ! First of all, thanks for all your answers, it helps me a lot, so thank you very much.

I know what I want : it is to get back with her. She is a good person, the one that corresponds to me. I know that there are a lot of other girls, but even the hottest couldn't make me forget her right now.

She just txt me : "I wanted to tell you that all we lived together was really wonderful. You're my most beautiful love story, you're someone formidable and exceptional. I'm sad and disappointed to have to stop everyhing, because of my work among other things. You'll ever matter for me, and I won't forget you and all the good memories we have together. You're someone good, stay as you are. I'm sorry for everything, I'd have prefer it to happen another way ...". She also told me that she keeps the massage I offered to her for christmas (we have to do it together) for this summer, if I still want to.
While reading this I wanted to cry. I didn't answer, should I ? It tempt me so much to respond her, telling her that I love her ... I know it's not a good thing to do ...
But maybe I can answer her a txt ? Because if I don't I'm afraid we won't speak to each other anymore ?

I think that right now I've 2 elements o contact her for the futur : my stuff and the massage.
If she asks me to give me back my stuff in 2 weeks, should I accept and make as if I were happy of the new status we have, of my "new life" ... ?

5 Days and still no news ...

I'm trying to look at other girls, but each time, I think about her, and it makes me a bit sad. I really don't think what are her feelings now. I think she doesn't love me anymore, but still has feelings. She must tell her "it's life, now I can work in good conditions, see my friends, and sometimes enjoy parties".

What to do ? I'd like to take her back, no matter if it is in 3, 6, or 12 months. I know that before this I will have to learn a lot about girls. I will. I really want to become an alpha male.

So any advice to keep a chance going back with her ?

I don't have advice about how to get her back. But I can say there is nothing wrong with what you're feeling. It is a natural part of loss. So observe those feelings, accept them, and put them aside. This will become easier as time goes on.

Don't worry about what she is thinking or doing. Those types of thoughts will run themselves around in your head endlessly. Why? Because there is no answer to those worries. You'll never know--even if you did talk to her and remember whatever she was saying, you'd constantly second-guess the words with their meanings. So when a thought like that comes into your head, observe it, accept it, and put it aside.

Once you stop worrying about what you're doing to be an "alpha" male... or what other people are doing to you... or what your thoughts are, what their thoughts are, or how others see you... I get the sense that you think being an alpha male will solve all your problems. Stop worrying about what will happen or what has happened. When you stop taking up time thinking about this, you become alpha.

In the sense that I understand it, you cannot become alpha by doing or thinking something to try to become alpha. You can only become alpha by not doing or thinking something to try to become alpha. What a wicked paradox. It isn't hard though; in fact, it is the easiest thing in the world. (Feel free to disagree!)

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- Lux et Veritas -

I was in your shoes a few months ago, and bro the only way you'll get over her is fully accepting that you will never have her back, and that the two of you are done, otherwise you will be hurting, and your heart will cling onto that string of hope that you're going to get back with her

want her back???
-act as if you dont want her back
-give her a disqualifying
-be playful with her again
-act as if shes a new target
-when she sends a msg dont reply (If you cant do that you cant get her back)
-realize that maybe the damage you made cannot be corrected
-she is not thinking of you anymore
-if shes thinking she is doing it in a pitty way(Im really sorry)
-now she is thinking that if she ask you anything you will do it to her
-now you are on your toes not her(the man's role is to keep women on their toes)
and I think the real reason you are here now is that you failed so many shit tests so you need to research all about them in deep so you know where you went wrong.

and if you want a technique that can help(but with a risk) is:
tell her that you want your stuff and that you will tell her a good thing that happened to you which will get her thinking really hard and then when you see her its really
important to act as if you really dont care about her and if she didnt ask what the good thing dont bring the subject but if she does tell her anything stupid like mayby passing a hard exam or anything. and then leave immediatly and then if she didnt msg you in about two weeks then you really really lost her and have no hope with her so accept that fact.

Ok ok

She sent me 2 sms last week and I didn't reply. But since that no news.
So I acted as if I didn't care about her anymore.
The only problem now : how to have a contact with her ? Or simply to see her ?
Because if I don't have to call / txt her, and if I don't have to reply to her sms, it could be difficult to establish contact now.

But one thing : I think I'll be able to be playful with her right now and act as if she was my new target, but it could seem to be strange for her, right ?

With time (1 week), I realised that I actually was too needy with her, and that indeed I failed too many shit tests. I was like she was the only one for me, and she, time after time, rejected me a bit more. (not rejected like a shit, but at the end, it was me that asked for us to see, it was me that txted her the more, that talked to her on facebook ...).

NB : we both were on facebook, online, but she didn't speak to mee. I also didn't ...

I just fucked another girl, 1 hour ago.
It was the same as if I did nothing. I was feeling nothing ! NOTHING !

I know that my ex is gonna stay in my mind for a long time, maybe forever, because as we say, we ever love a bit our first love.

This is normal...its a part of the loss you are feeling...you will need to give it time...that whole fuck 10 girls thing may not change nothing for you...It's a part of loss you just have to handle.

Essentially, and you can Google this...It's a part of mourning, grieving if you will. This person is no longer in your life and your mind is trying to unplug from what you are used to. She may have been so close to you and such a close part of your life that you miss her...again, normal...just give it time, leave her alone and just spend time with friends, meet other people and eventually, you will get there...it's going to seem like an eternity...Im still grieving but it's getting easier so trust me, Im not just talking fluff here...I know!

Its one of the hardest things to get over and if you two were close, then it may just take longer...everyone's time-frame varies

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You can't make the same mistake twice, the second time you make it, it's no longer a mistake, it's a choice.

Thanks cedius for all your advices, it helps me alot.

I really think that the rulle of the "10 girls fucked" won't work on me.
Since 2 weeks I only spoke to her once (I never contacted her), it is because she is about to lost her grandfather. Actually I lost mine 3 weeks ago, so she just told me how was her situation. I told her that I know the situation she is in, and that I am here if she feels bad. I conducted like a "gentleman", and didn't show her any sign of interest.
She asked me how I was going, I only answered that I'm well (and I didn't ask about her ! Good or Bad ? ).

I'd like to see her, really. Next time I'll come back in my town will probably be in 3 weeks. But how to ask her without making her think I'm needy ? Asking for my stuff back ?
I'd like to tell her that we are young, that we spent very good times together, but that with our actual situation (the distance and her work), our couple couldn't have worked. I have to learn a lot, to make my own experiences on everything, and she has to do so too. After my school I'll come back (3.5 years ... :-s ), or even before when she'll have finished her school (1.5 or 0.5 years), maybe we'll be able to be together again. I'd really like too.

But now I know that the distance is very bad for the couples. I know that if we want to be together again (one day), we'll have to live together / in the same city.

No...I think that was wise...Showing interest will only make things worse by opening up the lines of communication...you only want to communicate if you are still trying to resolve...otherwise...it again will set you back.

Do you "really" need your stuff back, if so, then make it a point to pick it up...that by all means is not needy, but again...there is again another chance that requires you to see each other and again, communication can come into play. Depends on how well you can handle that. Personally, I left all my stuff...it's over...don't want it or need it!
It sounds like you have thought this one through and thats good, it's sticking to it that becomes difficult, not to say you can't, but you need to stay on the path of NO COMMUNICATION to make that easier for you...don't worry about her or look her up on facebook or anything...it will just make you want to reach out. If it's meant to work, it will...just don't pass up other good opportunities as there are some really good ones out there...trust me...and I don't say this to make you hate her...but if someone she shows interest in comes along...trust me, she will do the same...use this time to grow.
Absolutely right! Long distant relationships are even tougher...just for the simple fact that you two are not there, email, text and phone calls just don't amount to much after being away for so long...some can pull it off though...but relationships really are work, good and bad...but when not around...just makes it harder.

Use this time away from her to live your life...you never know what can happen, just have fun, work on personalizing yourself and making you happy...once you have grounded yourself, there is a good chance that if you two were to cross paths again...she would see a different and better you!

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You can't make the same mistake twice, the second time you make it, it's no longer a mistake, it's a choice.