Ok so 48 hours ago I was searching my matches on okcupid and I found this really nice HB9 girl who was a 93% match. I probably shouldn't have read her profile since It just makes temporary oneitis more and more likely. Anyway she had everything I was looking for and she was sort of religious/more conservative. So I sent her a message. She responded literally 20 minutes later and I read it but waited the next evening to respond (last night).


Me: I was totally into your profile until I scrolled back up to send you a message and saw that you were a (her sign). I don't think we'd get along very well since I'm a Taurus What do you think?

PS: Photography is awesome! , I did a lot of it in High School


Her: haha if that is my only flaw than wow i should totally go crawl in a whole or something! What did you like taking pics of? Glad to see that a nice guy was into my profile instead of the creepy Bi 45 year old men from Puerto Rico....they just don't seem to go away? Do they bother you?


Me: Lol did you mean "hole"?

I took photography class back in high school and took pictures of a lot of interesting stuff outside and for the yearbook too. What do you take pictures of? No, luckily I haven't gotten any responses from Bi 45 year old men from Puerto Rico thank God. I'd probably close my account if that happened frequently. However I've gotten plenty from bi women, obese women, and women with children! . They are probably nice people....but I'm just not into that How often do they bother you?





And it's been about 24 hours without a response. I checked a few hours ago and apparently she already read my message and has already logged in a few times. So apparently she's either delaying her response, forgot, or I screwed up somewhere and she's not interested.

I was just wondering where I went wrong in my 2nd response and what I should aim to say to 2nd responses in the future?


Also I am considering IMing her in a few days with a harmless opinion opener and leave it at that if that doesn't go well. Good or bad idea?

she's probably one of these: "bi women, obese women, and women with children!", which you stated you weren't interested in...

this happens all the time, just wait a week than send her a new message with another thing that's witty. sometimes when girls sign on, they're so bombarded with messages that by the time they fing read yours they just aren't in a mood to "think"... also a lot of times they say to themselves oh i'll reply to this later, but then forget too... Lol I actually do this a lot with reply's I receive online.

Also could be a test too, girls don't want to feel like they were "easy" so they test guys by showing a little resistance. chances are she's only midly interested, most girls on free sites are. If it doesn't workout just keep trying new ones. A lot of girls really aren't actively seeking a guy, they're just on there for boredom or validation.

Hey guys, thanks. I messaged a few more girls and I don't know how to respond to this one HB9/10(don't know how to tell 9's from 10's). In her profile she mentioned she was 2 weeks new and has gotten a lot of weird stuff from people.

Me: I was totally into your profile until I scrolled back up to send you a message and saw that you were a Scorpio. I don't think we'd get along very well since I'm a Taurus What do you think?

PS: I'm new to POF and have gotten some really weird stuff too, your not alone

Her: Yeah I didn't even know what I was because I don't do that stuff....lol

I just got the message so I have some time to think about it but I'm clueless, she doesn't seem that interested by her response. Maybe "somewhat" since she did reply after all.

I know I should be more cocky/funny but I just don't know what to say. I wish I was natural at that.

I was thinking something like .

Me: Yeah same here, but a lot of girls on here are into that stuff. So your a student athlete, what sports do you play? I bet I can beat you at it

Wouldnt recommend that. From her point of view, you re adjusting your opinion to match hers.

Maybe just ask what kinda stuff she does do? Something like: " Really?? What a disappointment girl!!" Thereafter add whatever you like, maybe your athlete comment or smth else...

Escalate fast bro(get her number, set up a meeting, etc etc).

If she's not interested there's no point to keep trying(sounds like your only ending is mental masturbation)

And keep it moving.

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What makes an average looking guy instantly become “hot”?

Well it's the truth, it's just an opener and I"m not really into that stuff either. I guess I need to find more neutral openers since some girls really fall for that stuff and the ones who don't get turned off by it.

The ball is in my court and I haven't responded yet but I don't know what to say, It's not 100% certain she's not interested since she did respond after all. I just need help on what to respond with.

Don't buy into her frame right away by saying you don't believe in astrology either.
Try something like "I didn't use to believe in it but some girls I know have been describing my personality based on that stuff very accurately so I kinda started looking into it... not sure yet though"

It hints that you have a social circle. And that you've been pre-selected by women.


PS: HB9 vs HB10 - The way I look at it is if I can't easily imagine someone hotter than her, she's an HB10

Personally, I'd reply with:

"Really? that's rare, someone who actually takes things at face value. I am not unimpressed, but your profile seems like you've got a natural guard up, but I'd like to get to know you more. so do you have a sense of humor or are you just another pretty face?"

Just a thought...

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"Liars sit in chairs, you know. Truth tellers just sort of hunker down" -RF

Thanks guys, I sort of spliced the last two together. I just sent this:

Me: I use to not believe in it but some girls I know have been describing my personality based on that stuff very accurately so I kinda started looking into it... not sure yet though. So do you have a good sense of humor or are you just another pretty face?

Since I just sent it, let's see if she responds in the next 24 hours.

Ok she replied with

Her: Haha....I hear you. Well 1st of all I'm not too pretty...just a very simple country
girl & I like 2 th ink I can have a good time & entertain myself...lol


which is good but I'm not sure what to say when she DLV's herself (wtf lol...she is very pretty HB9).

My reaction would be to reassure her a little but don't pamper her too.

girls frequently have a lower opinion of their looks than guys think of them. it's a minefield!

my reaction would be to ignore it and make something out of "simple country girl" and "entertain myself"

I'd go with " ok, let's see, your modest, a slight sense of humor (we may need to make you funnier.. I don't know if you're funny yet) and knows how to have a good time... Great! I don't see why we shouldn't mee..... Oh wait, no. It's not gonna work. You're a ______ (insert random interest from her profile like a movie or music choice or books if she mentioned something like twilight) damn we were so close...

Ok, I going to go against my better judgement here and say let's chat anyway, I know it's a big leap but go ahead & send me your number and if nothing else you seem like you'd make a cool friend. "

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"Liars sit in chairs, you know. Truth tellers just sort of hunker down" -RF

I'm not sure in what way though.

What about me changing the topic since I am interested in learning more about what she's majoring in, going to school ect.

How about:
"ok, let's see, your modest, with a slight sense of humor (I like modesty, but we might need to bring your inner comedian out a little ) and knows how to have a good time... Great! I don't see why we shouldn't mee..... Oh wait, no. It's not gonna work. You're a rodeo girl, (I've never been to one). Darn, we were so close...

Ok, I going to go against my better judgement here and say let's chat anyway, I know it's a big leap but let's chat sometime. Since it might be too soon to exchange #'s (unless your comfortable) we can chat online at first, otherwise you seem like you'd be a cool friend "