ONE-ITIS!HELP ASAP!



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 Post subject: ONE-ITIS!HELP ASAP!
PostPosted: Sun Dec 26, 2010 4:21 pm 
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I met this girl few months ago. Got number. She had a long-term-long-distance relationship with some AFC(which I understood since she said she was with him because she understood how much he liked her and never even said that she liked him). Got date one-awesome, but little kino. Date 2-little kino, but we both really enjoyed the conversation. She is older than me. At the end of date 2 I went for a kiss(although I knew I didn't have enough complience for that I still did it. She turned her face away, but we still continued kind of conversation.) When in the bus I had to get off first, so I kissed her on the cheek(unexpectedly.) After that she didn't answer my sms, I sent another one, asking if she felt uncomfortable because I kissed her she replied no, it was just unexpected. I replied I knew she liked it because I saw her smiling when I left. Since then she never called me back, never answered my texts and even didn't say thanks when I congratulated her on her birthday through facebook. It's been about a month since her birthday, and I never contacted her after that. Any suggestions how to win her back?I might have developed a little bit of one-itis, mainly because of her personality and a lot of similarities in interests with me. She is about 7/10, but for an asian 8/10. She is the type of girl I would like to have a relationship with. So PLEASE HELP!!!


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 26, 2010 5:49 pm 
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does she have strong asian roots in the sense that she more asian than american in a social context?


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 26, 2010 7:01 pm 
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She is an international student in my college. She is from China.(this is her 1st year in USA) boyfriend is back in China.


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 Post subject: Re: ONE-ITIS!HELP ASAP!
PostPosted: Sun Dec 26, 2010 7:54 pm 
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After that she didn't answer my sms, I sent another one, asking if she felt uncomfortable because I kissed her she replied no, it was just unexpected.

Any suggestions how to win her back?
Would a guy who kisses women all the time send a text asking if a CHEEK KISS, ONE TIME made a girl feel "uncomfortable"?

No.

Win her back? You never really "had" her, so you never really "lost" her.

She may not be that into you, or she may be worried about entering a relationship with you, or she may be playing some retarded game of hard to get.

Either way, your best solution is to forget about her for a while, game other women, and see if she gets back in touch in like a few weeks / month.

As a side note, if you think the goal of PU is to develop super magic skills that will make EVERY woman love you, you're heading down the wrong track. PU is essentially about making sorting through girls, finding ones that are interested, and then closing as efficient as possible. Every mPUA of the highest calibre gets blown out, has bad dates, gets flaked on, and get broken up with. These are facts of life that never go away. The difference is that they literally don't give a shit and move right on to finding a girl that DOES like them. You should do the same.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:22 pm 
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if this is her first year in the usa you should be aware that dating works VERY different in other cultures as in china :roll: the fact that you told her that you saw how she smiled probably made her feel uncomfortable (she felt shame).

i would strongly suggest to learn more about asian/chinese mentality and even better to probably look elsewhere until you have done so


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 5:49 am 
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Blondguy:
I guess the only way is if I bump into her...hm. In the last 4 months that happened just twice-1st when I met her, and one more time in the library...gaming other women-I'm trying what else can I say. I'm looking into natural game now...any suggestions on whato to read?

Anyways, thanks for the advise.


Cindy:
I guess dating works much slower in Asian countries. I guess I also have problem with not having enough complience or something before going for a kiss. I even had a girl ask me "Why?" after I kissed her...hmmm maybe I should post this in sticking points.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 5:58 am 
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Hmm . . . I lived in China for a bit and I don't think that the dating life there is "VERY" different from any where else in the World. In fact, in many ways, I'd say that Chinese women are more 'empowered' than the women in the US. . . Any how, it's funny that you caught this because it's the one thing that really caught my eye:
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:roll: the fact that you told her that you saw how she smiled probably made her feel uncomfortable (she felt shame).
Rustam, this isn't something you mention to 'stimulate' her desire for you prior to getting any action. You keep this in your little file cabinet and when you're having sex and you're trying to convince her to swallow your spunk the next time around you go, "I'll never forget your smile after that first kiss on your cheek on the bus, blah, blah, blah . . I got off the bus and began missing you right away, blah, blah . . ." - (Pelvic thrust)

The other issue is that you went for the first kissy kissy on a bus. LOL . . .well, this reminds me. I suppose there is a tad difference in cultures. See . . .the thing is that many Asian countries are NOT traditional 'kissing' cultures. The full on tongue war type thing hardly even existed 40/50 years ago. A kiss on the cheek? Even now, adult friends hardly ever ever kiss each other on the cheek for it is an intimate act.

This one is over. Not even the most twisted play hard-to-get for a month.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:03 am 
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kasabi
I went for the first kiss on the busstop lol
it was after she turned her face away, I kissed her in the bus...I got couple of pictures of use together from date 1(there was a wedding going near us, so we just slipped in and took couple of pictures) maybe send them to her with some neutral message?
any help would be appreciated.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:11 am 
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Hmm . . . I lived in China for a bit and I don't think that the dating life there is "VERY" different from any where else in the World. In fact, in many ways, I'd say that Chinese women are more 'empowered' than the women in the US. . . Any how, it's funny that you caught this because it's the one thing that really caught my eye:
Quote:
:roll: the fact that you told her that you saw how she smiled probably made her feel uncomfortable (she felt shame).
Rustam, this isn't something you mention to 'stimulate' her desire for you prior to getting any action. You keep this in your little file cabinet and when you're having sex and you're trying to convince her to swallow your spunk the next time around you go, "I'll never forget your smile after that first kiss on your cheek on the bus, blah, blah, blah . . I got off the bus and began missing you right away, blah, blah . . ." - (Pelvic thrust)

The other issue is that you went for the first kissy kissy on a bus. LOL . . .well, this reminds me. I suppose there is a tad difference in cultures. See . . .the thing is that many Asian countries are NOT traditional 'kissing' cultures. The full on tongue war type thing hardly even existed 40/50 years ago. A kiss on the cheek? Even now, adult friends hardly ever ever kiss each other on the cheek for it is an intimate act.

This one is over. Not even the most twisted play hard-to-get for a month.
Yes I definitely agree, it's not that Asian women are hard to get, actually their very friendly, it's just that their culture shames them on being intimate. You barely see any Chinese supermodels or bikini models, their usually from Japan. Honor and integrity are a big part in Asian cultures. I believe that when their husbands died during any war they fought it, they would commit suicide to honor their husbands and prevent them from having any other relationship with another man. You making her feel good while she has a BF back in China probably takes her spirit and self-esteem a bit down.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:19 am 
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HappySlip:
She said that she was with that guy for about a year, then broke up, for some dude she liked, then "understood how the first one cherished her" and went back to him for about 1.5 year.

From what I've seen from PU so far could be simply put into one sentence:
"Go read books, practice, If you're flaked don't care and move on." So after all these years of practice nobody knows anything specific to do, except for "Forget about her and game other women"-You think I didn't try this??? I'm still going to game other women, but don't tell me that this one is "over". Peace.


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 Post subject: Re: ONE-ITIS!HELP ASAP!
PostPosted: Tue Dec 28, 2010 6:14 am 
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Quote:
As a side note, if you think the goal of PU is to develop super magic skills that will make EVERY woman love you, you're heading down the wrong track. PU is essentially about making sorting through girls, finding ones that are interested, and then closing as efficient as possible. Every mPUA of the highest calibre gets blown out, has bad dates, gets flaked on, and get broken up with. These are facts of life that never go away. The difference is that they literally don't give a shit and move right on to finding a girl that DOES like them. You should do the same.
Gold. This clarified a few things for me.

Quote:
Rustam, this isn't something you mention to 'stimulate' her desire for you prior to getting any action. You keep this in your little file cabinet and when you're having sex and you're trying to convince her to swallow your spunk the next time around you go, "I'll never forget your smile after that first kiss on your cheek on the bus, blah, blah, blah . . I got off the bus and began missing you right away, blah, blah . . ." - (Pelvic thrust)
Fucking funny. lol.

Quote:
.the thing is that many Asian countries are NOT traditional 'kissing' cultures. The full on tongue war type thing hardly even existed 40/50 years ago. A kiss on the cheek? Even now, adult friends hardly ever ever kiss each other on the cheek for it is an intimate act.
I am in Asia and I concur. In fact kissing in public is still frowned upon.


To the OP: The basics of PU remain the same all over the world but what you need in this case is a little more time and patience. Sooner or later the physical distance between her and the BF in this "long-term-long-distance relationship" will start to matter, and bother her. If you believe that you are not fighting a lost battle then what you can do is wait.

I may be speaking against PU norms here but I think ultimately if nothing happens then, being friends is still better than not being friends.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 28, 2010 9:08 am 
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So. I wait-for how long?How do I re-initiate the contact? looks like long distance boyfriend came for christmas break and they traveled to a few cities. Statistics:48 photos of her alone and one with her bf(or maybe this is some of her friends idk) Even relationship status isn't shown on her page-just to show that this really doesn't seem like a healthy relationship to me.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 30, 2010 10:00 am 
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anybody?


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 30, 2010 10:35 am 
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Ok mate the first thing you do is stop facebook stalking her. This is as easy as deleting her from your friends list. This is the absolute best thing you can do.

Sorry man, this is over and the reason is that it never actually began.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 30, 2010 8:28 pm 
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Being of Chinese descent, I can say that 99.99% of the Chinese population, first of all, is AFC. They study and study and study and study, never really understand social dynamics, and strive to get a really good corporate job to woo women. There are almost no naturals, and those who had potential are actually curbed by the social standards. Many habits from 40-50 years ago, Mao's period, still exist today. For example, sexual acts in public were not only frowned upon, but considered sexual assault where the man would be executed in front of the woman, and Mao declared it to be "rape." In the culture, however, this translates to teens and adults being more "prude." The frowning of athletics also came from this period. In my parent's childhood, they considered the athletes to be mentally retarded, the lowest of the low, and having to make a living through physical work rather than thoughts. Thats also why you saw little to no Chinese Athletes.

However, being 40 years more advanced, new things arrive. Deng came to power and opened China to the world. Thanks to Mao's brainwashing, the Chinese kids during that time were told that even in the terrible living standards and oppressive Chinese government, that China was more advanced in America. However, because of the new world and western influence, China has begun to develop a new culture. First of all, I'm going to say gaming in China and gaming in America are two different things. In certain sections of China, the more economically "advanced" such as Shanghai, Shengzheng, Wuxi, Beijing, and near those areas, women are in power. Yes, women have the power. This is the social norm! Hard to grasp, I know, but women have a complete grasp on the men. Men, because the majority are AFC's or conditioned to become one, take this on to themselves, and let it slip. Even now, my mom is yelling at my dad to do the dishes, even though my dad has to work. Also, if you ever meet this chick's parents, make sure you are extremely polite. In Chinese culture, the older you are, the more power you have. So, the girl still listens to her parents to a degree. The elderly are to be respected, and I have never seen ONE nursing home in China; there are parks where everybody goes to hang out, exercise, play, listen to music, dance, and just run around, which the elderly and many adults and kids go to.

So thats my two cents[end lecture/]. Just make sure when you game foreign girls, you are aware of the culture. I hear that in like eastern europe, men are extremely dominant over the women? They have like no power or rights whatsoever in the household?

I'm not telling you to adjust to the social conditions; you don't turn into an AFC to game Chinese women. I'm only telling you to be AWARE, so don't go and turn all haterskeptic on me.

Rustam; just letting you know: if this girl has a boyfriend, you really should stop pursuing her. Cheating is probably the worst thing you can do in China, and you lose all value and status if you are caught. Like, "dishonar yor farmily!" but worse.


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