| I wanna talk about something I've noticed recently in my own game.
I'm actually really fuckin' good at this. Like, really good. But, sometimes, I feel like I'm shit and like I aren't getting enough results. I feel like I should be getting way women than I am, and I can't for the life of me work out what the problem is.
Well, I've figured it out. And it's great. Are you ready?
State & Stakes
When I say State, I'm referring to your state in set. This could be in a club, it could be on the phone, it could be online, whatever. It's how talkative you are; it's how intelligently you communicate, it's how quickly your mind is processing what's happening around you and how well you're responding.
When I'm really in state, I refer to it as badass mode.
Now, I notice something about badass mode.
It only happens when the stakes are high.
I had a moment this weekend when I realised that I was out of state... I was in this girl's house and I was really into this girl. I had gone quiet and zoned out and it clicked in my head that if I didn't do something about that, our rapport would diminish and I'd "blow it".
So, I took matters into my own hands; I told her I was going to make a phone call, left the house and called a close friend of mine, who used to game with me. We had a long, animated conversation. I went back into the house towards the end of the conversation and began flirting with the girl and involving her in my phone conversation.
When I hung up, I was in badass mode. I was talkative again, I teased her, I was intelligent and attractive. We built deep rapport, and told eachother stuff we didn't discuss with anyone else.
When I'm speaking to a girl I'm really into, *click*. Badass mode.
Why? The stakes are high.
Ever heard the concept that people perform best what they've practised when they're under pressure? You only feel pressure when you care about what's going on... when the perceived stakes are high.
I notice that this has happened to me in the past when I've been demonstrating; for example, I was in a club recently and I met some guys I used to go to school with. I had spoken openly about pickup in their company, and one of them asked me to show them. "Let's see you in action!"
I approached a set and expertly performed group theory, isolated the target and made a deep connection with her.
The stakes were high; my reputation was at stake.
Have faith that when the stakes are high for you, you'll find state and be able to perform. Your badass mode is like a limit break (for all you Final Fantasy nerds) for your personality; it'll kick in when you need it, when you really care about a situation.
All the sets and situations you care less about, you should consider as opportunities to prime your badass mode. The more uninhibited you are, the more informed risks you take in badass mode, the more success you'll experience when the stakes are high. So do ridiculous shit to break through your fears when the stakes are low. Then you'll be ready to *click* when they're high.
I hope this helps.
Sky
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CHAT