Boy did I goof up. At least I think I did.

Been dating this girl for a while, shes been into me forever. She thought we were going to enter a serious relationship together, so we stopped things. She wanted to have fun and enjoy her life more before committing herself, but she does want a serious relationship with me in the future. However, I wasn't going to "wait" for her.

We remained close friends that acted like a couple. Nothing to complain there, friends with benefits, even though she didn't want to kiss cause she was worried we would enter a relationship......so more like cuddle buddies. Fun.

Lately I told her that I was moving on. A day or two afterwards she comes up to me with the same argument - she was moving on. She has a habit of repeating stuff I do. Like I don't log in yahoo messenger for a day, and the next day she doesn't log in.

Trying to save atleast the cuddling part (I really want something to happen with her, though not onetites. Dammit im becoming needy.), I told her that I really liked her. I never say this kind of stuff so she was touched, apparently she only thought I wanted her to satisfy my physical needs. She always complained that she was confused about us. She admitted her feelings for me too and agreed to remain as we were. However I still want the other physical stuff.

Any advice?

Admitting that you liked her was a terrible idea...

This is something that you SHOW her by escalation, NEVER TELL her.

I know, thats why I'm mad at myself. But I only see her in the weekends (college + work can be a bitch) and she wouldn't believe that I liked her.....trust issues.

Also, I froze her out a couple of times before. They worked, but she would later come complaining about her confusion again.

Confusion is good. It means she has definite emotions toward you.

If freezing out was effective before, and you don't feel comfortable just escalating right now, you could definitely freeze her out for a bit, ask her out, THEN escalate. If you have solid game, it should work.

I actually did that before, but she would still come with the confusion thing. Seriously who would say no to physical pleasure?

I sense bullshit going on. If I were you, I would pull off some reverse psychology on her and break the ice by directly confronting her. I would just say things like,
"I don't think you're worried about kissing and us getting into a relationship, you're just a prude haha." She's just one of those girls waiting for you to disarm her/convince her to get into a relationship with you because she WANTS that. When she told you that she's moving on...Moving on from what?!? Can't you see that she's already taking it serious as if it were a relationship...From what I understand, you want this girl too. So be a man and make her understand, switch her mind around. Put her in the sexual frame by saying, "Wow, you're really cool, and even if I didn't want to fuck you I'd still want to hang out with you." You are the compass here. You know you want her so stop lying to yourself. Either get accepted or rejected. Go in and confront her to settle it once and for all.

She is confused about the both of you because you are the man whose not taking responsibility. Show her the direction and get rid of her confusion. If it doesn't work out and she rejects, then no problem. Don't care about it and that's when you can move on by saying, "Alright, we're just friends then. Take care." This will really irritate her deep inside. Even if she does reject you, she would be lying to herself and she's perfectly aware of it. This girl wants you, there's no doubt about it. Sometimes you just can't rehab stupid. Get the confusion out of the situation to solve your own issue and let her battle with herself on the inside if she still doesn't understand. Some girls are just immature/insecure. Even when they're not confused anymore, there's really nothing you can do anymore...aside from maybe making her jealous.

Find out about her. Ask her questions. Just be like, "So you don't want a relationship because you want to have fun? The only thing I understand from that is that you just want to have sex before getting into a relationship." If she denies it just be like, "Well that doesn't sound like fun. You know that the opposite gender is always around and you're either going to have sex, or get into relationships in order to have fun." Think about it. You can't have "fun" if you avoid relationships AND sex at the same time. But look, if this is high school and stuff, then it's perfectly normal.

Really, this is good. This is golden advice. Couldnt have said it better myself

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

Once I told a girl I liked her, it opened her up to me, so it worked. Probably lucky?

I love you, seriously.

Amazing advice my friend, will try it out tomorrow and report back with what happened.

Cheers.

Yea she barraged me with more bullshit. I got angry and took the opportunity to practice my sailor talk before telling her to feck off.

Ahhh I feel like a huge load has been lifted from my shoulders.

Just in case I have a change of heart later on, what should I do to fix this? Shes not a friend anymore right now.

Crap now a lesbian who she likes is hitting on her cause she went to cry on her shoulder, dammit mankind is gonna lose a hot girl to a butch lesbian. Shes vulnerable I don't want her to turn lesbian. I gotta fix this tomorrow. Any advice? I know where she'll be at a particular time tomorrow. Surprise her? I'm assuming I will look bad.

Also sorry for the triple post.