I get what you're saying about the timing, I remember when I first started with negs (oh boy!), but hey, I learned from it and am more calibrated about it (fyi, I don't neg anymore, it was just an example)... that's why I said with the uber direct stuff that I just started experimenting with it. I just lay it out there uncalibrated at the wrong time.

I think, by your words, that my problem getting day 2's is that I don't connect with the girl for her to want to see me again. I was fun in the club, but now she might be thinking: "he doesn't see the world the way I see it."

Am I right?

So if this is true, could you help me out with connecting... how do you do it? (maybe give some examples?), so I can understand what you're saying, implement my own stuff and going out and trying it

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An approach a day keeps the guru away.

To connect, you just have to be more friendly and direct. Look, girls already know when you like them man. I know that you just met a girl but if you act like you don't care and you show her that you don't really like her, then you won't be able to connect. I thought that by doing that you can connect easier by making her chase but it really doesn't work in a situation that EARLY on. You may be wondering about, "Well how do I do that without appearing too needy?" It's simple. You don't directly tell her that you like her or anything, you just show it through your actions. For example after you met that girl at the club, you could have texted saying, "It was a fun night last night. Come drop by at ...(any location besides your home) if you can, we're going to...mall/shopping center/etc. if you can, bring money" And that's where you can pull off your shopping idea. The bring money thing is to show that you're not her sugar daddy for her to expect you to buy her things. The "If you can" part is so it doesn't appear needy. And once already there, you can do something like walking into some random store where they sell shirts or cheap jewelry where you can buy a necklace for her and she can buy a necklace for you or something. And then after the day is over she'll have that necklace you bought for her and she'll think about you. That's how you connect.

If she's all like, "Oh well I can't" without giving YOU another time to meet, you can just ask her, "Why?" If she says she doesn't have much money, you can say, "We're not going to a betting auction, it's alright haha." You have to know how to twist her excuses around so you can succeed. Learn from people man, ask questions, see what they have to say, be open with them. Like with the background, you could have just said, "What's wrong with my background?" You may have already assumed what's wrong with it, but you're just asking that so you can listen to what she has to say instead of getting defensive by showing you don't care what she thinks about your background. Example: "I don't like your background." You: "Why not?" Her, "Because it makes you look like you only care about sex." You: "Well that's just an impression, not a fact." And with that you can KEEP your background up AND twist her mind around into the right direction. You only act careless ONCE you get directly rejected. Don't try to assume that she's rejecting you and ignore her/act like you don't care because you never know what you may miss out on. Some girls however, never directly reject you when they truly are so you're unsure about how to end it. Instead they give you a lot of "I don't care" signals where your instinct will tell you that she's rejecting you. In that situation, you can just go ahead and say, "Look, it seems that you're rejecting me and I don't like to waste my time with games." Her: Yeah I guess I am, sorry. You: "Alright, it was nice knowing you, take care." Remember, you are a man. You solve problems, you find out conclusions, you finish what you started. Do not hesitate to go down the path of being accepted or rejected. Just make the moves, confront them, get it over with, find out in what direction you're heading in with that girl, the other girl, etc.

Trying to show your careless about what she says regarding the background and that you don't care if she'll date you or not does not work in this case because it's over something stupid and it's too early on. Most likely she won't care either because you two just met so there really isn't anything special between you two yet. Instead, take down that background and most likely she will notice it and talk about it. Now here is the key. If she says something like, "You just took it down because you want to date me" or anything along those lines, you could say, "Naw, I just realized it's immature and I'm not like that. Anyways, last night was pretty fun. Come drop by...(like I said earlier)." It's basically telling her you don't care about going on a date and that you do care about going on a date. (Again, you don't want to close the door on you because you want this girl, am I not right?)

What you're doing is trying to avoid rejection with all the indirect mind games where you're saying all these things that aren't actually true about the way you really feel about her. It's being fake because you feel one thing and say another. That's not what a real man does. You MUST take the path where you either get accepted or rejected. The only way that will make you a real man is by not caring ONCE you happen to get rejected. You will also learn more that way. If you don't try and connect, act like you don't care, trying to get her to chase you, you will be neither accepted or rejected as you have planned, but you will not have learned anything either or possibly missed the opportunity to get with her.

Yeah, I get what you're saying. I actually asked her: What's wrong with the background, and she went: Do I even have to explain?, from there I assumed what I said before and texted what I posted here.

I don't get that last part though, I told her I don't like games, that I liked her and that we should meet up... what's indirect about that?

And I was actually thinking about taking that background down, and then when she text me with something I'd go: "Who is this?" haha, but that could go either way I think. She'd either try and make me remember or forget me and not respond.
This isn't like me at all. I always express how I feel inside. I think you got the wrong image of me. I was just asking HOW you connect.... but I think I know... you share stories, search for commonalities, see if you watched the same tv show as you were a kid, share experiences and see if they match or if she has one similar.

Am I getting it right now?

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An approach a day keeps the guru away.

You don't really express how you feel inside because when you said that thing about, "You won't expect much out of a date with me but a few laughs and good conversations." or something along those lines. Come on now, that was like basically saying you don't care.

When she asked you, "Do I even have to explain?" You should have just said, "Yes, I'd like you to explain it since you brought it up." And if she kept trying to avoid it, I would say, "I like listening to what girls have to say." That shows you're an alpha male. Most guys don't listen. And as you would know, she would say how it's immature and how it makes you look like you're looking for sex after which you can shut her up with, "That's just an impression or judgment, not a fact."

And yes, to connect, you share stories, you do all that. But you keep the stuff that doesn't pertain to your goal to a minimum. Your goal is to what...get with the girl right? So avoid the nonsense through texting. When you said, "What other mischief have you been up today?" I guess it sounded playful but it didn't pertain to anything.

Now about when you told her you wanted to meet up. You said, "look... I don't like to play games, I think ur cute, but we're not in a relationship yet. as soon as we have something you have the right to say something like that, but we're not there yet Wink if you want to meet up again the choice is yours"

Too much writing man. You even brought up the word relationship which alludes to the fact that you're thinking about it. And the choice is yours stuff wasn't good to say either.

Here is how I would have done it: "It was a fun night last night. Come drop by at ...(any location besides your home) if you can, we're going to...mall/shopping center/etc. if you can, bring money"

OR, "Come drop by at ...(any location besides your home) if you can, we're going to...mall/shopping center/etc. if you can, bring money"

She's not going to come back to you and say, "Ok, I have made my choice. I want to date." No, scratch all of that. Tell her to come drop by or meet you by giving her the location AND time. You're not here to tell her what choice she wants or has, you're here to GIVE her the choice of going or not going.

Let's say I am going to fight this guy. Which would sound more direct and reasonable? "If you want to fight me, then we'll fight." OR "Fight me tomorrow in the park at 3:00 pm."