Hi,

Yesterday I went out to a club with my friend. So the point was to "get some chicks". The problem is, you walk into a club, get a few drinks and then start approaching women.

The problem is, when you approach a woman, it means that you want something from her, anything, like even wanting for her to say hi back at you. It's like you went up to her, so you need something, not the other way around. She did not come to you.

The the dillema is that I feel I am SPAM power to her because of that. I know how that feels. I have been chased by other women in my life which I don't like, and it feels like I can say whatever I want, do whatever I want and I don't care because she wants me.

So I kind of feel that in the club, the woman has the power over you, because you need something.

I mean, I can hang out with my friend and drink next to a bar for like 15 minutes and talk. But eventually after 15 minutes you will run out of things to talk about with friend, and then you get the "you gotta do something" feeling. So you start approaching women, with that stupid needy feeling.

How do you make it appear not to be needy? I don't understand this. How do you make the woman feel like she needs me, not the other way around? I am stommped.

the audio kinda sucks on this, but its funny, and i got a few tips from here that kinda touch on what your talking about, cuz i had the same thoughts a little bit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4dxrSiD ... re=related

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thats very simple: DON'T BE NEEDY! going in with the intent of scoring is needy. come off as chilled and in control, being needy is no different from begging,

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life sucks and then you die! deal with it

hi dude.

first off, dont do alcohol in clubs. You want a serious shot a gaming in a club? do it sober. Women get "harassed" by drunks all the time. Nothing new there.

Secondly, no matter where you are, if you talk to somebody, you want something. even it is sheer company. You actually should not worry about that.

when approaching, you only look needy when you think you look needy. Really being needy is not being able to let go one girl, after she made clear that no means no. And even then, all this being needy crap...its all in how you are and act towards women.

In a club, you go to women and have a good time. fuck neediness, fuck what they might think of you. You approach them and try to talk. In every club there is a place where to music isnt as loud as right on the dance floor. Needless to say that this place i am talking about is NOT the dance floor. You can get to know each other there if you wish.

You can also go up to a girl and say: hey, i want to dance, lets dance. then you dance. if you had fun, try to isolate her and talk her into meeting again or sex, depending on how much fun it was.

No matter how you go about it, there will always be girls who will say no. No problem, pick somebody else. Some are there with their boyfriends. No matter what you try, most of them will say no. its reality. true seduction in a club is not existing. Its a numbers game to get a good response, then you are able to start the real gaming.

Give up on that neediness shit and sorts. Be who you are, make fun. No girl is every going to think right away: omg, this one is needy. In a club, they will think: is this a gutless loser or a man doing his thing here?

cope with that.

ciao

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Like the naked leads the blind.
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thank you guys for your responses, it further opened my eyes with these new perspectives. The point is, just to have fun, coming from your confident self, all you are looking for is to have FUN, no intentions of picking up chicks, hey if it happens, then that is a bonus.. which most likely will happen anyways with such an attitude I could write more thank you's but I am kind of tired at writing right now, since I invested my time in a heavy response in my other post, Thanks again!!

In regards to fun, i think the defenition of that should be: "nothing forced, at your own pace, feel confident, and it has to feel genuienly fun for you, anything can go, as long as you don't hurt anyone, usually the out of ordinary things are most fun, the things that other people don't do, no more boring chit chat, if the FUN comes, hey it will come!"

So first of all, your mental attitude needs to shift. You're not there "to get chicks," you're there to have a fun time, be social, meet some people, dance around, and if some women get caught up in your whirlwind of amusement and awesomeness, then all the better!

Secondly, your actual execution of the situation needs to shift. The two guys standing at the bar, talking nervously, looking around, meeting the girls eye, then looking away, then after a few minutes summoning up the courage to walk over there and deliver some opener, even if the opener is GREAT, are some of the lowest value guys in there, apart from the ones by themselves not talking to anyone, and the ones picking up the empty bottles off the floor.

Before you get to the club, warm up at a nearby bar/pub, and during the day beforehand. Just get into a social mindset - talk to anyone, not just hot women. Have a joke with the guy serving you a sandwich, with the girl serving you drinks, etc. When you're in the club, you already want to be in a social mood. Shake hands with the bouncer on your way in and be polite, joke around with the girl in the cloakroom, etc etc. Then open EVERY SET as you walk in, based solely on proximity to you, casually, over the shoulder. IT can just be to ask where the bar is, or anything like that. If you can't continue past that, just thank them for being friendly, shake hands and wish them a great night. You can re-engage later if you want.

What is the point of this? Once you've done this 5-10 times, there will be a significant number of people who are now noticing you. Firstly, there area those you can now look around the venue and actually make eye contact, smile and and wave to, because you shared that 1 minute interaction earlier and they recognise you. To other people around, they will assume you know each other. To women especially, you appear to be someone who knows a lot of people, and who a lot of people are noticing. Why? What's so special about you? She's intrigued. You can now afford to go directly up to a set of HBs you're actually interested in, with your value raised, and you're no longer the creepy guy in the corner who "wants something," you're the social, fun guy everyone knows, and you're interested in getting to know her too

The final step in the process is to go out to clubs with 1 wing at most, and as many female friends as you can bring. However social and awesome you are, your highest value position from which to look around, force IOIs and then go open sets, is when you are already in an interaction with at least one hot girl.

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Excuse my vulgar language but FUCKING A!!!

Follow these rules and you WILL have a freaking good night!
Wen't into a club with this mentality/strategy. Met some cool people, talked to everyone, everyone was noticing us. At the end of the night the people in the corner of the club were calling out my name!!

Seriously mate. Follow blondguy's strategy and you will have a great night. You might not go home with a HB10, but you will wake up the next morning feeling like a God!

Wow, an excellent responce. This is exactly what I was looking for!!! Thanks a lot for your input. U just made my day.