Start from scratch on this one. Too many holes and too many DLVs.
My honest criticism, imagine the parenthesis as the HB's thoughts:
Bob:
"Been trying the mystery method (DLV, you need to try a method for talking to girls?) So far it hasn't been working for me. (Although its a supposed method to help, it couldn't help you?) I am trying to pick up chicks (You're trying to be a player, but still can't do it even with help...sad)."
HB
"That sounds silly *Negs you*
(Im gonna be nice cuz I feel sorry)
You should instead be yourself."
Bob:
"Well maybe I should look for friendship.(I guess he maybe a NICE guy. Or this can be a trick)
See One of the things I learned was this....."
You start the Kino, & Kino esc.
(He wants to be a player so he tried to learn a method but failed, then he wants to be friends...now hes touching me. It is a trick. ALL SYSTEMS, BITCH SHIELDS UP! )
Good effort on the originality, like mentioned before has too many DLV negative spikes. For ideas on openers try the search.
Personally I'd stay away from mentioning anything relating to the arts
UNLESS she brings it up. Then switch to pass the shit test mode.
my 2 cents
-JUSTINcredible!