no joke here, but the key to strippers is COCAINE!! you need to make like youre a drug dealer, without actually talking about drugs. get the app on your phone that is for fake calls. get her to sit with you and your friends, and buy a round of shots. then pretend to answer a call on your phone, and sound like youre agitated, like you have your little drug peons calling and pissing you off. at this point, you can make an easy number close. you can hangup and say something came up and you have to leave, but youd like to give her a shout later to see if she is "partying". this makes it sound like you have to go deal with some hard ass business, and that you wanna meet up later and "party".

if you dont want to bail at this point, you can stay after your phone call, and try to run game on her.

you might laugh at this or think its stupid. but there is one thing 95% of strippers have in common. they love drug dealers. theyre attracted to the bad boy nonsense, and the fact that they will most likely get free blow out of it.

your other choice is to throw around a lot of money. if youre being really flamboyant and buying a lot of drinks for your friends and the waitresses. then strippers will see you as a bank. which sounds bad, but is good. when they see you like this, theyll come try to sell you dances. if you never go for a dance, then she starts to realize youre not the average chump who goes to a strip club, and that maybe she could date you and have you take care of her, since you have money to throw around. so if you can line up a date with her she will most likely fuk you, because she wants to leave a good impression on you before she is gone to another town. she doesnt want you forgetting about her.


sorry if some of this seems jumbled or out of place. its the end of my night shift, and im tired as hell.