are you David de Angelo? one of his students?

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A's Ranks Higher than King and Queen

Na, is my info very similar?

Edit: Awww, I just read up on him a little. He has somethings that are similar but I ain't a liar, this guy says fix your self in days not years. There is no shortcut for this. I don't want you to become A Man I want you to become The Man. There are some quite a few things I am sure we over lap on but I don't think I will cover all the same topics in here. I did read Double your Dating a long time ago, I take a little bit of everything I have read so I am not surprised there are some things I have covered that is his.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Good job Man! do the searching and summarizing, we do the reading and learning... Keep it Up!

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A's Ranks Higher than King and Queen

Thanks for the love Hombre. I am glad you are getting something out of this. I hope everyone is getting a little something. These are just things I wish people would have told me about.

If anyone wants me to elaborate just let me know. I am willing to go into more detail, just need to know if anyone wants me to focus on anything as I go.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

This Smile is For You

If you want each person to be differentiated and you want to create a powerful smile you can do a couple of things that will help. You can delay it and you can give everyone a separate smile.

What you want to do is look at the person, make eye contact and than begin to smile. This helps them realize that this smile is specifically for them. You help them feel special because you give them a smile for only them. It is a great feeling to get a smile for just you and you only. It adds a powerful feature to your Charisma, because you have another tool to differentiate your audience.

This was something that was in a book that I had never heard of before. It was an amazing experience the first few times I used it. I am usually smiling so for me to not smile it is more of a chore than to smile.

If you are going after a specific girl you may want to smile slightly different at her. A good way to do that is with slight submission, with a lot of confidence. A good example is when you look at her and make eye contact wait a second, smile and turn your head for slight neck exposure. That way she realizes this smile is for her specifically and you changed your body language slightly to differentiate her from the group. You also showed signs you were harmless.

This is a good tool for business especially. If you are going in with some big whigs and want to make a good impression it is a very good idea to differentiate each business person so that they will all like you. Interviews amazing guys. Very strong tool and very good to have in your closet of tools.

I may start writing a little less but posting more often so that I can get some more information up more often.

More later guys...

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Reaching Out

When we like someone we tend to reach out for them. A person with charisma seems to be touchy, but not touchy in an uncomfortable way. They tend to touch your scapula, or your upper arm in a neutral way. They will playfully touch people in a place that allows you to be comfortable(non-sexually, initially anyways). Most of the time we are cool with a shoulder nudge or a friendly touch on the bicep/shoulder. Charismatic people tend to do this naturally, they are reaching out for you.

They also will have incredibly open Body Language. Their body language seems to be open to physical contact. Wide open arms and a big smile. They are welcoming you to come over and hang out, to talk and be happy.

Even when they aren't next to you their palms seem to be extended toward you as if they are reaching out to touch you. Obama was very good at this even on TV he seemed to be reaching out for you. He did a lot of other things as well but one of the parts of his body language that helped with his charisma is his hands that seemed to reach out for you, he said "We Need Change" while reaching out.

So remember if you want to seem Charismatic you have to reach out for people. You need to be willing to touch someone. I happen to do this naturally now, as a small town boy it took me a while to get comfortable with not having my personal space. Touch their upper arm/shoulder gently with an open palm. Make sure it isn't a pat but a touch. Nobody likes the guy just walking up and patting you on the back but when we meet and a nice friendly neutral touch isn't bad.

Be friendly, but don't be to touchy. There is a fine line between being friendly and being touchy. I have a couple co-workers that are very touchy, and I promise they don't have any Charisma they are merely creepy. The touch should be there but long enough to be noticed very short lived enough to not be creepy.

Note: There was study done on servers, if the servers were more touchy towards the elbows of the customer they were likely to get a much bigger tip. They studied which servers did that made them earn the most tip money and they happened to consistently involve touch in their serving(there was a few other things but this is directly related to what we are talking about here). I don't remember where I read it but I do know that the servers I have the most positive feeling for tend to be the ones who touch.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Humble

People who tend to be charismatic never seem to be better than you. They are very humble, willing to show humility. A lot of people come on here and say your the prize and you are better than people. I don't see this productive at all. These tools and habits will be with you the rest of your life. Adopting a superiority attitude will only bring you hatred. No one likes someone with a superiority issue. This is also a great way to show your insecurities in my opinion. Someone who is confident can also be humble, if you are over selling your self you are showing obvious insecurity issues from my standpoint.

If I make mistakes I often call my self on them. I humanize myself as much as possible. I call my self on arrogant statements, "sorry that sounded arrogant". You are never better than anyone but you are as good as everyone. You shouldn't sit there and place yourself on a pillar because someone makes less money or has no job currently. You may have your opinions but stating a obviously sore statement will not help you make them feel good.

When you tell stories they don't always have to be about you accomplishing some ridiculously overblown story, you can show you are human by showing your imperfections in the story. Don't devalue yourself as they say but don't make yourself seem like a super hero either. You are just like them, one of them, you guys have a bond because you have found some sort of common ground. You should find all sorts of ways to humanize yourself without devaluing your self.

I have to stress the importance of not having a superiority issue. You need to be just as human as them. You need to be able to make fun of yourself to make people laugh, you should prove you are human. Always be willing to endorse your humilities.

Diplomacy- A Art

Learning to be a diplomat is the most difficult mission you will ever have. I have found that it isn't necessarily what you tell them but how you say it to them. We already discussed diction and it's importance in adding elegance to the statement you make.

You can tell someone that they are an idiot, or you can say "that doesn't seem like an intelligent action, how did that turn out?" You always have to be willing to modify your statement even though the intentions may be the same. The same idea of how a lawyer asks a question in court movies and the judge says Sustained, change how you say it.

My job taught me to become a diplomat, when you are in management you need to figure out how to treat people you don't like good. If you show favoritism games you lose the respect of a lot of your co-workers because you will do hypocritical things, let one person do something while other can't is a good example. You need to learn to forgive but not necessarily forget.

Direct definition from Dictionary.com of diplomat- a person who is tactful and skillful in managing delicate situations, handling people, etc.

Learning to have tact in your statements and more importantly making it habit is very difficult, it takes a lot of conscious effort to modify your statements before saying them. We naturally say what comes to our mind and learning to state things in a diplomatic way is going to need a serious adjustment period.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

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Diction- Revisited...

Ok guys I wrote up a lot on how you choose your words, how you can say things far more elegantly. There is something that I missed and I should emphasize on.

If you want to make sure the message is to that person and you want them to be comfortable with you. Make sure you speak directly to them. If you guys have realized I use a lot of we, us, our, you, xxxx (Name), etc. statements in how I write. When you guys are talking these words should be a big part of your wording.

We should go over here.
This is our time.
Don't give us a hard time.
You are very impressive.
How are you today xxxx?

These statements make them direct and they also help do a couple things. One of the things they do is they individualize the person(you, name, your). The other thing you do is you end up on their side because you are a part of we, us, our. You guys are in it together.

Another statement I love to use and use it all the time is "You're right". This is awesome because when you agree with their insult you take power away from it. "You are ugly", "You are weird", "You are crazy", "You are interesting", "You are fat", "You are stupid", anything answer is "You're right". Or "It's true", "Of course I am", some version of they being right. I give them the ability to be right. We all like someone who makes us right. Plus any confident person can agree to anything and it won't change his state of mind about himself.

The magic word because has been mentioned a lot through out my posts as well. This is xxxx because bla bla bla. Waiting for a long bathroom line: Can I use the restroom because my daughter is crying with my wife? Can I use the restroom because I got to go? Because get's you permission to do a lot of things.

Love is a very powerful word, if you say oh I love this. You evoke what love does for other people. I love surfing, describe that passion and it may evoke theirs. They may say oh I love snowboarding. I love playing xxxx sport, oh I love xxxx sport. I often times will say something goofy and if they look offended, look over and say "love you" in a sympathetic joking tone. My body language is usually pretty open.

When you are speaking you are speaking as if you guys are in it together. Do not speak as if you are separate how can that possibly help? You are looking for common ground and trying to relate, if you use statements that separate them from you why would it be useful? A lot of pompous people with serious superiority issues separate themselves and place themselves above others using their language pattern. Then they can't figure out why no one likes them.

I hope you guys are studying words. Adding words to your diction can seriously enhance your intellectual value. Add more and more words(not words people don't understand) to how you talk, expand your language.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com

Just came across this topic and I was only able to read the first post before going of to work. Very detailled and fact based stuff. I'll read the rest in the upcoming days. I know this isn't really the place and that this debate has been going for ages, but what's your take on canned material, C&F, ...?

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"Tonight you're a star and I'm the big dipper" - Prince

great stuff.

one comment with regard to something in the body language section. putting your hands in your pockets with your thumbs out is an unconscious gesture that gay men do when they are attracted to another man that they are talking to (I sat in on this sexuality class one time, don't ask). the thumb out is the unconscious phallic gesture. soooooo, I would avoid making that one a habit, especially when talking to men.

Thanks for the love. Read both ridiculously long threads?

Actually straight men and gay men do it alike. Girls also do this. It is just a general gesture we all make. Gay men are known for it a bit more but I know I have stood like that around attractive girls. I know I have seen others do it as well at least here in Utah.

The goal is to bring attention to your genitals, it is a sign of sexuality. When the right girl does it it is quite sexy.

It isn't just a gay men thing, it is a people thing. If your thumb is popped out and pointed I can most definitely see it as a phallic symbol, but to me it is more the action of bringing attention to your genitals. A lot of shy men will also do this when they are announcing their sexuality.

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Thanks man, I hope you enjoy the topic, I have to find time to get more stuff up.

I don't care for canned material or routines. Be yourself is how I see it. You don't want to run out of material and have nothing but awkward moments in situations. You don't want to be a routine guy.

There are steps to courtship and there are routines. Most routines follow these steps. If you learn the steps and what they mean you will be far better off than being someone else and only knowing one way to talk to girls/people.

That is just a small statement regarding it. I don't want to get into this debate and ruin a thread I think is turning out pretty good. So lets end that discussion here. If you'd like to start another thread I would be happy to discuss it.

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mate , youre such a chap

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Seize the day

your point about vocabulary is a good one, hank moody anybody? i know he's fictional, but the show makes it very believable, he just oozes charm with the way he speaks.

Thanks for the love Smooth.

Yeah Altered, it is ludicrous that nobody really makes this topic. Diction is huge. I made it a topic a long time ago, and most of that info from that thread. They said I sounded pompous and that it wasn't as important. I consider body language the most important part but diction is huge. It exposes your intellect through them very subtly, but I was hassled about that as a topic. It got some love but people weren't as impressed with it as a topic.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com