So I've been dating this girl who got out of a 4 year relationship with another girl. They broke up almost 7 month ago, but It seems that they are seeing each other again now. Anyway after I realized that I kind of pulled back, but my feelings for her kind of stood in the way, which resulted the following messaes:
Me --> Her
Quote:
Hi Gen,
I was keen to meet you tonight as I wanted to talk to you. but you are quite busy with the roomamte issue. I needed to tell you this and I would have much rather said it face to face. but anyway...
See, I think we are both in a very sensitive situation, which is why I think we should really be honest with each other and leave the least to insinuations.
Gen, I like you very much and I have developed strong feelings for you. I didn't make a move or act on it as I didn't want to push you into something that would result in both of us getting hurt. I felt that you have some baggage from your previous relationship and perhaps you prefer to move things slowly.
I genuinely believe what is between us can develop into something really nice. but at the same time it is very hurtful on my side to feel like an alternative or a rebound. Which is why I really want you to be honest with me. So let's be clear on where we are at and where we both want to take this.
She replied:
Quote:
'm also of the opinion that we should be honest with each other and leave the least to insinuations. I guess I didn't make myself clear enough when we spoke that day in the park and I'm sorry for my blurred words- I am not interested in a serious, committed romantic relationship right now, and I'm also not interested in a nebulous, non-committed one.
It's been great getting to know you, and I do think that we connect on many levels and would like to keep sharing and learning with you. I am aware I may have led you on to think there was a possibility for more than a platonic friendship, but at this point that is really all I can offer.
I was a bit surprised when I read your message because it feels like you were expectant of something I had made no promises about... both regarding the nature of our relationship as well as how I was to spend my sunday evening [she met with her ex and they posted pictures of eachother on facebook].
I take this in stride and hope we can continue to be part of each others' lives, if it's not too hurtful. Let me know if you want to go see some art or drink some tea/coffee on thursday. I'd be up for it.
Now this is bullshit because we held hands, and she even was about to kiss me the last time we met but I pulled away. so I replied:
Quote:
am sorry if my message gave you the impression that I had those high expectations. I didn't. specially regarding how you were to spend your Sunday evening. That's not really what I meant. However I did see a possibility for more than a platonic friendship, and would have liked it to grow into another level. I thought we had our moments. I thought you were about to kiss me that night at your doorstep. but perhaps I was blinded by my feelings for you, and read too much into things. sorry.
You are very sweet, and I cherish seeing you and I also wish for us to continue to be part of each others lives. I'm up for meeting on thursday for one last time. I think I would need some time off after that so I can digest this, emotionally. Later, when I'm ready, I will let you know and we can start having our picnics again, and if it has gotten too cold by then, we'll do it inside.
Now she has been canceling our meet-up twice and asked for raincheck. I can't make anything out of this. Is this a good sign? I want this to work. what should I do? I know so far I have acted really amateur but that is because of the insecure state I am in. I'll appreciate any advice.
CHAT