What I mean is, when attractive women are around, its when I'm the most social. A room full of guys, generally I could care less. Some unattractive women, could care less. One attractive woman, even if she is with a man (and I know it), I'm the social butterfly and I can see an astronomical difference. So it really gets me down to a few issues. One, its hard for me to be enthusiastic about regular people. I am so motivated by women, it literally "turns me on", it turns my personality on. I don't feel like its an act though, I'm not canning lines and being disingenuous, in fact I feel relieved when I am the way I am around women. I'd go as far as to say that I sort of feel repressed otherwise. Like its some form of expression... What I want to know is if you think this is damaging? I can't force myself to be enthused in the company of people I don't have an attraction to, THAT would seem disingenuous to me, so it feels like I'm phasing in and out of 2 different worlds/bodies sometimes. I know not everyone gets this, a lot of guys do the opposite and get really AFC, some people (with no game) can stay enthused by most people but never get anywhere with women. Is this something I really need to try to fight or is it just a part of who I am? Some people have sports, some people have dance, I feel like mine is women, and if there are no women involved, even as a topic of conversation, most of the time I feel like I'm sitting in a math class.

_________________
The best PUA advice is also the best fighting advice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ijCSu87 ... rn-1r-4-HM

Personally to me, it sounds like you might be trying to fill a hole with women, to help cover up something in your past, maybe a bad relationship? I wouldn't say its a bad thing, if you enjoy being out and having fun, and picking up women then go for it, I am new to this stuff and I'd never been to a house party before, I went to one last night and absolutely loved it and kiss closed 2 girls. I'm off out again tomorrow night.

What I'm saying, is if you enjoy being around women that much, then just go out and be around women. As long as it doesn't affect other aspects of your life then I don't really see it as a problem.

Well I did have a relationship that went sour but my friends have always known me to be don juan even before I got into that mess. I sort of identified this recently though, its like women break my general apathy. I don't see how it really effects other aspects of my life, it seems more like the other way around. The rest of my life gets in the way of being around HBs which brings me out of my apathy.

_________________
The best PUA advice is also the best fighting advice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ijCSu87 ... rn-1r-4-HM

Im actually feeling this thread.

Just the other weekend i was at house party there were no hotties. When we were there my friend asked the house owner where the hot girls are. She said what do you only come to parties for the girls?

i thought for a second and said in my head yes i do, im not going to come and hang out with some bland stuck up private school guys.

we ended up driving 30 mins back home and watching tv after staying for about an hour. Sounds fuckin lame but it was actually more fun.

I can't force myself to be enthused in the company of people I don't have an attraction to, THAT would seem disingenuous to me, so it feels like I'm phasing in and out of 2 different worlds/bodies sometimes.

id quote that but i dono how.

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Never
Not
Smile

Exactly. I DO go to the parties for the girls. Don't get me wrong, I can be enthused to people I'm not attracted to, but that usually only happens when women are involved somewhere. Otherwise, its like I'm in stand-by mode or something. "Oh, more guys, great." "Oh, fat chicks, great." Why am I here again? I can drink anywhere, if I knew it was going to be this lame I'd say we all go to a bar or find something else... But of course I can't say that.
Me and my friends recently got into board games. We play a few nights a week, I find it rather fun, a little social interaction is better than going home (if I haven't queued any movies to watch), but that's when I most notice the other me. Its just me and my close friends, so I'm sitting there holding cards and thinking to myself "I would not be like this if a woman was around." I would be infinitely happier, more expressive, more everything.

_________________
The best PUA advice is also the best fighting advice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ijCSu87 ... rn-1r-4-HM

I have this problem too.

Now I love hanging out with my friends, both male and female. But disregarding time with my homies, I find myself totally bored and irritated if I am stuck in a situation with no prospects. I want to have charming conversation and be adored by sexy men.

What's worse is I've recently become resentful of my less attractive female friends, and AFC male friends. I'll be standing around with some guy, totally feeling each other, and they'll come up and smother the situation with uncoolness. I HATE myself for thinking that, but its true.

If you find yourself at sausagefest parties, then time to get some cooler friends!

As a more serious and general point, we're all here because we want to improve our success with women, and in general our success in life. Women is one aspect of that, but it's not everything. We also have health, wealth and security of body and mind, amongst other things, to be constantly trying to improve too. Thinking of every group of women as a "set" and every guy as an AFC or AMOG will turn your vision about the other aspects of your life myopic, and will detract from your overall success because you will become a very one dimensional person, without breadth of character and substance.

You could close yourself off to any social interaction that doesn't involve the possibility of getting laid, or you could see that room full of mostly dudes as an opportunity to gain some new friends - maybe one or two of them will be having tons of hotties over later to their place, maybe one of them is really driven and motivated and will help you get a great job someday, maybe one of them's super rich and has a huge hosue you can throw an amazing party at...but you'll never know if you don't take EVERY social situation as an opportunity.

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LOL

I recently noticed this.

Most my friends, or girls that I have been seeing/wish they were seeing me, know that if they want to get me out, THERE HAS TO BE GIRLS.

It's not a great characteristic, you need to be able to do your thang in any situation.

I know exactly how you feel though, some situations can just bore you senseless.

Now, back to YOU.
I went through a period of this too. (And tbh, still am).

Tell me though... do YOU feel it's a problem. Do you feel in anyway, this is ruining your motives... is it stopping you from doing what you want to achieve? If so, then yes - it is a problem, and you'll have to overcome it.

If no... then, no, it is not a problem, it's just a case of something you don't find enjoyable. And if you're not finding it enjoyable... either 1) Don't do it. 2) Find a way to make it enjoyable.

_________________
Munroe: "I kinoed the hell out of that goat"
Jav: "bashing chodes 24/7 ftw"
Slywalker: "Neg the bagel"
Slywalker: "I had a 1yr old GF when I was 19"
SS_Trunks:I asked her for an extra pen, confidently....

I was walking through a club this past weekend, keeping an eye out for people to start a conversation with. It was 10:30 and the place was pretty sparse, and I couldn't see a group that interested me enough to go over and be social with them. Some were not hot enough, a few were too hot (hey, I'm still improving, not going to flex like I have no fear at all), some groups had too many dudes, etc.

Someone I've learned a lot from on this subject told me that in his opinion the best way to approach social situations is without assumptions while being open to all outcomes. The way I interpret it is that the group of uncool looking dudes might be the coolest group of guys you could ever meet, that less attractive woman might just make your day in ways you could never have guessed, etc.

I strive to have an open mind, and to enjoy meeting and socializing with other people without any motive beyond having a good time. Don't get me wrong, I want to make a deeper connection with gorgeous women as much as the next guy, but I'm starting to see real value in being open to more than that.

My two cents.

No need to pathologise this and beat yourself up. Fuck of course you are going to be more motivated and 'turn on' when there are hotties around. I would say to roll with it. On the other hand, you could be shooting yourself in the foot by being the life of the party with hot girls and a deadbeat with other people. People (including hot girls) will pick up on this and perceive the incongruence as disingenuous. As long as the contrast is not too stark should be able to get away with it though. I've seen a lot of good players who are pussy triggered in this way.