Hey guys, I really need some help on this one!

Okay here's the deal: Once on facebook I had added my friend's girlfriend. They've broken up since then so I decided to maybe start something with her. I tell her early on she's about everything I look for in a girl. They never talk and he knows nothing of it, not that I would care if he did.

She's in GA. I'm in IL. I'm from AL and GA, and I would move back there if I had a reason to!

Long story short, I began a conversation one night, and somewhere either that night or the night after, things got sexual pretty quickly. She sent me a picture of her tits Sunday night, and several clips of her moaning, which I assumed to be a step forward to actually talking. That night I also hinted at us maybe speaking on the phone and she seemingly dodged it.

Forward to tonight after I'm done moving: I try to escalate, just try to get her to say what she thinks about me, and it backfires with her saying something about how she has a lot going on and "needs some time". She hasn't sent a text back since, I've only sent her a message asking if she was awake.

Whew...there it is.Now, my first feelings about this were pretty bad. I thought epic fail, but then, she's being very promiscuous if she'll send someone pics of her, but bails the second I try to escalate, right?
Thoughts PLEASE!

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This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

I have exactly the same issue. You can check out my post. here-vp379517.html#379517

I think the girl is just using you to get over what she is feeling. It is like you're a second choice to her (back up plan).

For my situation, for a girl to use you like this is because they are taking you for granted. The solution?

Have her chase you. Get her to invest more in you. Ask more from her. etc.

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"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

I'm not a fan of the part where you tried to get her to tell you how she feel about you, you also told her straight away that she's everything you look for. She now has nothing to work for.

Next time try saying something like "they are pretty nice, but who hasnt seen a nice pair of boobs!? and i'm starting to think your trying to turn me into a bad boy!"

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In it for the parking, ok?-

So apparently she "passed out" last night and that's why she didn't respond or anything. The more I've been thinking about this chick the more irritated I get at her disregarding attitude towards me.

She seems to only want to use me, like you said OM, and that makes me not really give a shit and say whatever I feel. Earlier this conversation happened:

Me:Do you even know what I look like?
Cyber-Slut: Yes I'm smart enough to look at facebook pictures
Me:Well I didn't know since you never ask me anything about myself.
Silence for a few minutes, then I write, "Well I'm going on a date, i'll be online later"

At 8:13 she said, "Oh ok...well have fun"
Then at 9:03 she sent a message saying, "You trying to make me jealous sir?"

I sent nothing back till about 12:30 saying "Hey...I was just being honest. Why would you ask me that?"
Cyber-Slut:No reason im going to bed though i gotta get up in like 4 and a half hours.
Me:"aight, have fun tomorrow lol"
Cyber-Slut:alright lol ill try night good sir i uhh hope you had fun tonight and do tomorrow
Me:Oh I work tomorrow...so fun lol. nite. Ill be up for a while in case you can't sleep
Cyber-Slut:haha mmk

Then at like 1:30 she was doing stuff on facebook, but i didn't contact her or anything.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm getting too emotionally involved/attached. I like her a lot, at least, the -idea- of her, so I've decided to back off...a lot. If she continues contacting me, what should I do? I refuse to be her toy, but if I be my usual self and come out and say that, it could drive her away completely. Advice please!

_________________
This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

Bro, I don't mean to sound rude but you are fishing for compliments from her, and telling her she's not asking you questions about yourself. You've already told her she's everything you look for, and now you told her "Ill be up for a while in case you can't sleep."

You've entered into wussy zone, a zone thats nearly impossible to get out of. You are too emotionaly attached, and you thru in "i gotta go, i have a date" in randomly. That's why she said are you just trying to make me jealous.

You can't win em all. But don't be so nice next time.

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In it for the parking, ok?-

Yea man that's what I figured...which is why I've decided on a freezeout now *sigh*

Me saying the whole date thing, yea I suppose it was too random and kind of obvious lol.

If there is any salvaging it though, I think I'm just gonna harden up and use a great freezeout line I read in the lay report section. "Your actions and words are not meeting my needs". Sounds like gold *thumbs up*

_________________
This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

Telling a girl that she is everything that you look for puts pressure on the girl to keep up what she is doing. Imagine a girl telling you that you are everything that they have looked for. Of course, you would feel happy, but at the same time you would feel pressured to keep her thinking that way. So what you do? You back off, because you are afraid of breaking this persona that the other person has of you.

Perhaps she doesn't want to see you in person, because she doesn't want you to disappoint you. Everyone is insecure to some extent so they have to have this sort of feeling. Unless they are super comfortable with you, then they would not be afraid. In other words, if this is the situation, you will need to build more rapport with her. [trust] [good feelings]

Haven't you thought of this as a possibility?

Also, the thing about telling a girl that she is everything you always look for does not necessarily make her have nothing to want to work for. That kind of stuff is bullshit.

Girls will invest in you as long as they like you. That is all there is to it. Nothing you say or do would really change how they feel.

In other words, make her feel more attracted if you want her to invest more.

And in my opinion, I think it is actually good to say "I will be up if you need me" in your conversation with her, because it shows that you care about her. This tells the girl that you are worth it. Girls want a guy who they can rely on. Period. [just be careful turning into her emotional tampon or friended zone though]

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"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

Thanks guys. Tbh, when I told her she's everything I look for, I didn't plan on going after her at the time...and yea, I know I need to build rapport, which is why I've tried going to phone conversation. She can send me sexual clips of her moaning but can't have a conversation? lol..

I'm going to use the line I mentioned previously, because at this point, I feel as if she's not on an emotionally mature level such as I, and she can't just be honest about the way she feels.The question is though, should I say it first, or wait for her to initiate contact, THEN say it? Both have advantage, but I'm leaning towards the latter.

It really makes me question if I'm cut out for Pua, since that (for the most part) is what it is, a bunch of little games. can someone provide some insight on this as well? I hate it..or perhaps I'm just making excuses for my failure. Much love for the help guys![/b]

_________________
This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

Yeah the thing with cheesy talk is sometimes the girls don't believe what you say, and this makes them distrust you.

Tbh too, I really have no idea why she is not willing to talk to you on the phone when she is willing to send you sexual clips and such. I would actually like to know how the minds of girl works.

Just like with my girl, she indicates strong feelings for me over some chat, but over the phone she tells me she is not interested in me. What the heck is going on? 1) she's playing me 2) she is using me as a back up 3) she's not ready

All indicating "No real feelings towards you" . 4) other [immature] which i am hoping for .


Yeah sure. If you are ready to face the truth you have to initiate the contact because that is called being a man.


PUA is pick up. Hooking up girls.

The stuff in PUA is worthwhile though.

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"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

Dude seriously, these girls are trash for behaving the way they have towards us. They've basically been stringing us along for the attention, imo. It's extremely disrespectful to use someone like that, especially since I was 100% open and honest from the beginning, but she can't reciprocate. It's just cowardice really. At least you got to phone conversations with yours haha, but I'd still drop her like a sack 'o taters! I don't think it's going anywhere man, it's all just a game to them. The whole PUA community would have never been necessary if women were just honest and had the guts to say what they think and feel.

_________________
This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

I'm planning on gaming her now.

_________________
"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

I know dude, it's a necessary evil...it's a pity really. Anyways, I basically sent my girl a wall of text earlier explaining why we shouldn't talk anymore...and now she's all into me again ahaha...but I'm keeping a distance this time! Maybe I'll post what I wrote, it's a lot and I dont feel like transcribing lol

_________________
This isn't just about picking up girls; it's about building a life!

lol

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"There is always a solution to even the hardest problem in life."

"If something is important enough to you, you won't give up"

This is my point, NOT being interested in a girl will get a better reaction.

Last month I had one going, a GOOD one. At first I acted like I didn't give a SHIT, if I told her I was staying up late she'd say "I'll stay up too cuz I haven't talked to you enough the past few days :

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In it for the parking, ok?-

it didnt post my whole reply.

This is my point, NOT being interested in a girl will get a better reaction.

Last month I had one going, a GOOD one. At first I acted like I didn't give a SHIT, if I told her I was staying up late she'd say "I'll stay up too cuz I haven't talked to you enough the past few days " She had to work a bit. and i rarely hit her up first.

but later, i ruined it. I started telling her I missed her, and I really liked talking to her. At first, she would say things like "OMG! you're actually making me blush! " but I kept saying it, and it became too much. I became too wussie. Now I haven't hit her up in weeks. but the thing is, i dont care now a days.

Pua is for everyone man, not just pro's.

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In it for the parking, ok?-