Ok so last night we met up

I got us a table at a new bar - so new it was pretty much empty but it was a classy kinda bar.

Anyways last night for the first time we actually started to touch and hold each other, holding hands, touching leg, our legs touching and was proper nice.

I didnt kiss her she is holding back. When she was about to go home, it took her an hour to leave me. All we did was hug and she was kissing my neck and all over my fucking face bar the lips. I kissed her on her neck (she liked it lots). We basically kissed without kissing - she is obviously not wanting to come across as someone who cheats which is a good thing i guess.

I gave her the whole "ever sat next to someone you felt so comfortable with that you had to resists so hard kissing them" she actually replied with a "yeah - you".

I am still gonna persist cos she so badly wants to.

Her boyfriend fucking called though three or four times, which she rejected, but i told her to pick the phone - basically the boyf said that something aint right between them.

Dang! she needs to get her head straight! She needs to be with you and not him. Good job though man!

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-->Turbo<--

Good job Johnny! But as Turbo said, she really does need to get her head straight and decide who she wants to be with!!

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Day By Day, Night After Night

Johnny your playing a risky game man, make sure your not also being played around, maybe you don't care? Some people don't, but I don't do second best.

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It has crossed my mind that im bein played around.

She is tellin me to be patient. Am I second best? I think she would rather be with me but she, for some reason, cannot break it off with this guy.

So I think il just actually totally ignore her for the next couple of weeks and see how that goes, it may give her the shock she needs I dont know.

But thanks for all the help - it def gave me the confidence to pursue this.

I'm glad it crossed your mind, because it's a possibility, especially her doing this to her current "bf". Play it your way, keep your kool, act like your busy and treat it like no big deal.

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Im backing Chelios on this one somewhat (with minor adjustments).
Do not pressure her on leaving this guy. For whatever reason, she does not want to leave him. She may be considering whether you would make a good boyfriend for her, if you would stick around for her. She may just need the incentive of your companionship. Because of this, I would advise you to make yourself busy yet available for her. I do not think it would be good if you run away from her just yet. She gave you hints that she wants you, but you got to be patient with her. If you show her that you have other females in your life, that you are not going to wait around just for her, she may just speed up the process of leaving her man (and you do not look like a chump that is waiting for her while she has someone). \

Hey, if your concern is that you dont want to be second best or played around with, get another girl so that she knows that you cannot be that second best (and if anything you are playing each other). If you just wait around for her with no one, you will be a chump. But if you ignore her too much, you prove to her that you were not willing to stick around as a boyfriend and that will make her want to stay with the other guy...

Like the rest of the advice here, never place too much importance to one female, or she may take advantage of your neediness and desperation. Females can sense when one does not need her because of other females (these are the Alpha Males)....

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Well said!

Ok new news.

Basically the boyf broke up with her today. Which she was engineering as the guy is a violent prized fucker.

What do I do and how do i play it? I am not thinkin she will be with me instantly but what im thinking is that I just maintain contact and go out as per usual.

Advice would be much appreciated.

My advice would be, don't jump in and be a mug, keep your fair distance, don't be the person she turns to on the rebound. Sure go out, have fun, bang her if you can and let time go and have fun, whatever will be will be.

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Thanks mate

Thats what I anticipate on doin. It will also be easier seeing as she is goin on holiday for a week next week so its timely she is goin away I guess. Gives me a bit of thinkin time and breathing space.

Definitely, and please in the mean time, keep busy, have some fun, think of yourself most of the time, not her.

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Hi Guys,

So its like this, next week we are going out for drinks - her and I. We have been out before but never turned the "heat" up a notch or ten.

I am aware of what you guys have said above and have borne that in mind. Been going out chatting to girls etc and having fun. but seeing as we work together we see each other on 4 of the 5 days usually.

I am kinda growing frustrated by my lack of ability to actually "sieze the day" when we go out i.e. For some reason I cannot escalate the tension between us that already exists.

Can someone give me pointers in respect of turning the conversations between us a bit sexual makin her think of me having sex with her etc), a bit flirtatious, a bit of kino so I can then find it easier to escalate it to a K close. I need her to see me as being confident (I am confident around girls i dont really like but lust after - she is a bit diff) Should i be blunt and upfront? and tell her how much I want her etc?

This is kinda my last chance I think, but last chance from my point of view, I doubt she is thinkin that. I just wanna get closure on the tension and the only way is by what I want (and I think her but not as much as me)

Basically I need to get her turned on so much that she wont resist. On previous occasions I got her turned on but not enough not to resist the urge. This time I want to get her on it

Thanks

Maybe Im too late..

Dont put too much pressure on yourself to turn things sexual as it will come off as artificial and too 'try-hard'. Relax. Use every opportunity to make use of sexual innuendos. One of my favorite is to accuse them of wanting you or taking advantage of you. This all needs to be context of course. Eg. from the beginning when asking her out on the meeting, when she agrees to meet with you tell her that you can only meet up on condition that she doesn't try to get you drunk and take advantage of you. If shes in college writing exams, tell her she needs to stop fantasizing about you if she ever plans to pass her exams etc. It can sometimes feel like a losing battle when trying to get a girl reciprocate that sexual vibe, particularly with younger girls. You need to just keep hammering at it until she opens up. Note that most girls (if attracted you) WANT to flirt sexually, they fucking LOVE it. They may however not want to come across as looking like sluts. In my experience it is not the thinking of WHAT to say that is the hard part, its the continuous persisting in order to combat her ASD. You can also shape her. ie. convey that you will NOT think of her as a slut if she reciprocates sexually. She cars about what you think, so let her know that her being sexual with you is ok (not directly, but mention a side comment like 'i think its ridiculous how society frowns upon women wanting to get sexual with a guy too soon even shes sexually attracted to them...we're all human beings here, if a male and females are attracted to each other then its clear what nature intended for them!'.

And dont be upfront and blunt about telling her how much you want her, SHOW her this (kissing, touching). And you say you want her to SEE you as being confident, the only way for her to see this is if YOU see and feel this yourself. Stop caring about the outcome and nerves will diminish. As you say you are confident around girls you dont like, but its purely because you dont give a fuck about the outcome. No matter how much you like this girl, you can always do better than her and have the ability to meet someone else in no time. You will start believing this as you start dating more and more beautiful women that you once thought were out of your league.

Maybe the reason you havn't escalated yet is because your worried she ma reject? You obviously want to escalate by dating but something's blocking you.

If you want to kiss her and require smething to ease the situation, maybe use a gimmick, good for conversation too, like you were watching this program on kissing (before you came to meet her) and insert any comments you wish, I'd say "Isn't it weird how they people actually give ratings on kisses on such a regular basis?" One girl looked like she enjoyed it so much but only gave him a 4, damn that sucked!"

Then turn it onto her, has she ever seen anything like this, or crank it up, ask her, "have you ever been rated when kissing? "If she says yes and she's good, say I don't believe you and you want to find out, if she says no, say let's find out" and wink.

You need to push a bit now, because the longer you leave it, she will start to resist more or start seeing you as a friend, if all goes well, move location, have some fun.

Chel

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