I gues alot of people give these reactions because they feel you're in a self-fulfilling prophecy. The way your acting so cool about it, and pointing it out as a fact that you are nervous with women is the same reason why people are accusing you for beeing not true to yourself.

I looked up the definition for it

A self-fulfilling prophecy is a prediction that directly or indirectly causes itself to become true, by the very terms of the prophecy itself, due to positive feedback between belief and behavior.
Although examples of such prophecies can be found in literature as far back as ancient Greece and ancient India, it is 20th-century sociologist Robert K. Merton who is credited with coining the expression "self-fulfilling prophecy" and formalizing its structure and consequences. In his book Social Theory and Social Structure, Merton gives as a feature of the self-fulfilling prophecy: e.g. when Roxanna falsely believes that her marriage will fail and fears such failure will occur that it actually causes the marriage to fail.

The self-fulfilling prophecy is, in the beginning, a false definition of the situation evoking a new behaviour which makes the original false conception come 'true'. This specious validity of the self-fulfilling prophecy perpetuates a reign of error. For the prophet will cite the actual course of events as proof that he was right from the very beginning.
In other words, a prophecy declared as truth when it is actually false may sufficiently influence people, either through fear or logical confusion, so that their reactions ultimately fulfill the once-false prophecy.

But you're missing one important point: I've only managed to be successful AFTER realizing I had this problem.

last question before I bail from this argument
how many women have you been with? I'm not trying to degregade you I just want you to realize you don't have a problem...

and how old are you?

it's crucial because sexuality doesn't built in one day, first few times where confusing for me

_________________
"StreetLight!! Stop seeing every problem in life like it's a chick you didn't hit on!"

If we use a lose enough definition of "been with" then
1) age 17, first girlfriend... only achieved a partial erection and couldn't feel shit
2) 20, my friends were trying to hook me up with some girl I didn't really like... played strip poker, 4 of us in a tent and my friends turned to watch the moment I mounted her (really I can accept I would have failed on this one regardless of any issues)
3) 32, dated a girl every night for a week then went back to my place and made out on the couch... got back to my bedroom, continued making out then lost the erection for no reason once our pants started coming off
4) 32, with an escort giving me a bj... wasn't hard enough for it to really be enjoyable
5) 32, again with an escort, same problem but we actually attempted sex
6) 33, same girl as in 3) actually... took us several tries as well and as I said, a couple times since I've had the problem again...


My first attempts were certainly confusing, but my first few successes weren't really. I thought there would be more to it somehow, but after two successes in a row I just felt good about it.

I take it those are just a few times of failed sexual experience and not the only sexual experience you ever had...

which again I consider to be perfectly normal, I think I failed more

(off note I though you where younger, I thought your 17-20 or something)

but recently it jumps more and more for you... well maybe you should get a professional opinion.... what could I say (although I still believe it's just in something you invented in your head)

_________________
"StreetLight!! Stop seeing every problem in life like it's a chick you didn't hit on!"

Nope, that's pretty much everything. Unless you want to count getting to second base with my first gf, or getting lapdances from strippers.

The big block of time between 20 and 32? Nada.

I am seeing a therapist... have been since 3) which is when I realized I must have a problem. I mean, the second time the circumstances were weird and the first I had no confidence and we'd been fighting... but that third time everything was "normal" going in.

check ur pm

_________________
"StreetLight!! Stop seeing every problem in life like it's a chick you didn't hit on!"

Yeah why doesn't this forum notify you of pms? I had 3 from like a year ago! Nothing important, but still...