| A while ago I downloaded an interview between Adam Lyons (AFC Adam) and Jonathan Lee (Sinn), in which Sinn explained his five supposedly irrefutable laws that should govern practicing pick-up in-field. I took down notes about all the key points in my journal book, then I recently typed-up these notes on computer. I can't remember where I downloaded it from... otherwise I would have just posted a link instead. Still, I pretty much live by these "laws" and I hope they help others sharpen up their game mindset.
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1) Whatever Doesn’t Help You - Ignore It
- Being non-reactive, having a strong frame, frame control – vital to pick-up, but everything really boils down to what you focus your attention on.
- When presented with a problem, being smarter means you try to fix it, when often you should just ignore and move on. Naturals tend to be on the dumber side.
2) Always Be Cooler Than The Girl
- The idea of always being a little more comfortable, a little more in-control, a little cooler, a little more relaxed. Body language, teasing and winning frame control battles.
- Goes back to being non-reactive, which is a major part of “Game”. Whoever in reactive more has less social power.
- Be less reactive, appear less into her than she is into you, be working not as hard to make the interaction happen, always have a better comeback when she says something but don’t try too hard to prove yourself.
- The best pick-ups happen when you pass each phase with a minimum amount of work/effort.
- Self-amusement is a big part of this; no matter what happens, you’re having a good time. Routines don’t work if you’re not really into them.
- Fun is the ultimate attraction switch – girls go with emotions.
3) ABC Rule (Always Be Closing)
- Escalate or move on (you can usually tell when things are “on” or “off” from the get-go).
- Screening to escalate as quickly as possible being the general goal (mainly night game), regardless of how long it takes. Not being there to waste time when the interaction isn’t going anywhere.
- Dominance and some degree of aggressiveness are “alpha” characteristics that help women become attracted. Too many guys are afraid to escalate.
- You’ll get blown out more from not escalating than escalating too much. When she’s interested, take it to the next level (quickly). Otherwise she’ll get turned-off by rationalising to protect her ego.
4) Saying Something is Better Than Saying Nothing
- Applies to opening and staying in set.
- Avoid awkward pauses at all costs – doesn’t matter what you say, just keep talking, because this allows comfort to build.
- The social hook point is much further in than most people realise. When you can stop talking, and they will fill the space with statements and/or questions.
- Just because they listen to you, doesn’t mean they like you. Keep them invested in the interaction for as long as possible; they’ll be polite not to seem rude.
- Not all of your material is going to “hit”, regardless of what you might think. Test for reactions and develop a compliance “base line”.
- Better to buy yourself time and sacrifice some value than to create than weird, awkward social space. Going quiet gives you no options.
5) Thinking In-Field is The Enemy
- You do worse at “Game” when you start thinking too much about it (over-analysing). Community has a tendency to always analyse.
- Seen a lot in many situations, usually before going in (because guys are so freaked out).
a) Running through all the bad possibilities that could happen.
b) Trying to think of what they’re going to open with.
c) Where they’re going to stand and how they’re going to get over there.
- Conditioning your brain just to go in straight away, putting a tremendous amount of pressure on your brain to make something happen. Your brain will want to avoid social embarrassment, responding to conditioning and giving you good things to say. Become more spontaneous by forcing yourself into these situations.
- You get over AA by conditioning the impulse you have (to approach) to respond correctly. Shrink time between thinking of approach to approaching – the more it will become “auto-pilot”.
- The field is not a time to strategise, instead it’s a time to react and make things happen, making moves and possibly make mistakes, but most importantly try things instead of sitting there and analysing what you’re going to say (routine). You need to prepare beforehand then try to forget (being “in the moment”).
- Guys usually put more value on girls than girls put on guys, which makes them looser in social environments, whereas guys can have the wrong sub-communication and appear too outcome-based and incongruent.
- Sinn’s way of thinking in-field: “What is the most fun thing to do right now?” Then when having an interaction that goes well: “What does this girl need to move forward?” The rest is counter-productive, imagining stuff that isn’t there.
- The more you think about things, the more your perceptual filters, beliefs and values are going to taint that information. Misreading things many times in field.
- There is no pain-free way to become good at “Game” – you’re going to get blown-out and weird, unpredictable things are going to happen. Being smarter doesn’t mean you can control all the variables. Move forward and enjoy as much as possible.
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CHAT
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