My social group has been asking a lot of questions lately. Mostly about why I've become so much better with girls. I usually reply that it's just a change in attitude.

Am I being selfish by not telling them about Pick-Up?

Many theories state that you need to be dominant in your social group, but what if there are about 5 pick-up artists in a group? You can't all be dominant, and someone is inevitably going to be lower down on the ladder. Wouldn't that person's social value be lower than the rest's then? The competition aspect will also come into play, and as a result the group dynamic will be damaged.

All things considered, can pick-up artists co-exist in the same social group?

i would avoid this sort of discussion with friends i told someone once and it isnt good, there are several possibilities firstly they may try to amog you (by saying he had to learn that out of a book or something like that), they may think you maybe a loser or worst of all if you're in set and they blurt it out in front of the set to blow you out or embarrass you GIRLS TALK!

i have to tell you i told my closest friend about pu and even got him the game, the rules of the game, mystery method, and the natural art of seduction. anyways i told him all about game and how it works the part thats interesting is he's married and has a child but he asked me the most peculiar question would i (or get a pua to) hit on his wife because shes frigid! he said it was ok to try and bang his wife to see if its all guys or just him shes frigid to!

_________________
life sucks and then you die! deal with it

I think this actually has nothing to do with pickup. It's more to do with normal, everyday issues, namely how tight you and your buddies are.

My best mate is a wing of mine, and introduced two of my other best mates to pickup a couple of years ago. We recently introduced another good friend to it.

When we are out, say four or five of us (some good friends before pickup, some meeting after pickup), we don't have issues sarging. In fact our power and skill is multiplied exponentially.

The key is to have a few ground rules. Each person makes his target clear, and no one else hits on that target. Then everyone works towards sorting out the obstacles or winging, or sarging other targets. The net result is:

a) Much easier to close due to obstacles being taken care of
b) much higher value due to winging (DHV stories of each other)
c) massive social value due to owning every set in the area through your group - i.e. if your mate locks in a set, that social value rubs off onto you when he comes back with two hot blondes draped over each arm.

If you are having trouble sarging in a group (as many PUAs do - it's not uncommon), in my opinion it has nothing to do with PU, but your friendship and personalities (and possibly, as an extension, egos).

I hope you don't not agree with me digressing slightly, I just also wanted to take this opportunity to comment on "coexisting" (to use your terminology) with PUAs who you meet out in the field:

I've met a fair few, and I know people who have also met a fair few. It seems that the question should definitely be separated into two tiers - GOOD PUAs, and "wannabe" PUAs. I hate to use that term but it's simply the most efficacious in delivering the meaning: the vast majority of PUAs we chance upon out in the field are...to put it in the most polite manner possible, "beginners". And it's usually a case of being nice to them and making friends for the night. Rarely have I personally got into an amogging battle with another fellow PUA, although I know of one or two cases where this has happened. Still, my point is, this scenario is a long way ahead of us in time. I think the trend still seems to be a large input of awful & fake PUAs, at least in many parts of England (I imagine it varies widely geographically).

I tell friends.

Hell, when I was in highschool I would read PU literature in public.

_________________
Every Saint has a Past, Every Sinner has a Future

I swear to GOD - don't tell them anything!

I keep this stuff secret even from my 2 best friends. Don't do it man! It's long to explain exactly why, but simply keep silent about being a PUA.

Think of it like this - If they really deserved to become PUAs, they'd find the seduction community on their own like you did. Don't give them any undeserved
gifts.

Pick up is one of those things in life - the fewer people know about it, the better.

_________________
I can FIX ANYTHING!!!

Lollers. This is just hilarious.

Not sure you should judge whether to tell a friend or not by how insecure you are about your own ability to pick up women. Talk about a scarcity mentality!

Very interesting.

I would say in the south east of england NO.(if your friends don't know)
Most afc's in my area have a small amount of game allready compared with americans.(i am sure some of you yanks will disagree).
My point is you would be seen as as a threat. All the dj's in nearly all the clubs are on to PUA.
I would keep a low profile at night. Day game is different.
You could get a friend involved if he needs or wants help.
Keep your friends separate from the game.
Ignorance is bliss they say.

_________________
Its getting Hot out there.

Its all to easy.

I want to be a tree!

Mate you from Kent ye? Get in touch. I recently picked up a few girls from your area.

beckenham has some nice girls

_________________
life sucks and then you die! deal with it

I really don't think this matters. Funny thing is the guys who are afraid to tell people are not going to be very good anyway because of the issues that lead them to be so afraid of competition.

I really don't think it matter who you do or don't tell, it's all about how your percieve that part of yourself. Hell one time I sat a girl down and explained to her about Ross Jeffries and Speed Seduction and then explained to her that I didn't know much about it but I was going to use some of his tricks to get her to sleep with me... guess what... it still worked just fine, and I'm not even a SS guy.

To prove a point to a friend of mine I once walked up to a girl and within the first minute or so of the interaction I informed her that I am a mysoginist, womanizer and I would be using lines verbatim from a book designed to teach me to get into her pants. I then informed her how after I had gotten in her pants I would likely leave without cuddling and not call her back.... unless she was exception in bed, in which case I would probably use her for sex for a few months and then break her heart. My friend could not believe I actually said something like that, but was even more surprised when I bounced her and her 3 girl friends to a friends nearby apartment to "party".

Now I'm not telling these stories for any other reason then to make a point (No thats not all I said, I proceeded to "do my thing" after that). The point however is that this thread is an "inner game" thread as far as I see it, and the most important part of "inner game" is perception.

Change your perceptions, change your life.

Or even better the next step,

Control your perceptions, control your life.

I told my friends what I was doing when I started doing it and for the most part the response has been "I think that stuff is retarded but if it works for you it works", really if you're that afraid of a little competition you're holding yourself back. Who cares if rolling with a few PUAs lowers your perception of value? When it comes down to it, competition is the only way you progress yourself, stagnation breeds an inevitable decline; I'd say fuck it bring it on, you should have enough faith in yourself to do whatever the hell you want, if you can't do that then you're fighting one boring ass battle. Really, my friends are too comfortable where they are as are most and that's cool, nothing wrong with wanting to become good with something; if they're your true friends then they'll understand that, and if they aren't the hell with them.

_________________
"All the dragons in our lives are perhaps princesses expecting us to be handsome and brave, all the terrifying things are perhaps nothing but helpless things waiting for us to help them." Rilke

The few friends I have mentioned it to have been nothing but encouraging and supportive.

I didn't intend for it to sound as if I was afraid of the competition, but now I'm thinking that maybe, subconsciously, I might have been. It's actually more a case of me trying to co-exist with the inexperience of other, developing PUAs. To illustrate my point, I'll use last night as an example:

4 of us went out. Two guys have just read the game and watched the pickup artist. One is a semi-natural but wants to get into the game. I'm the most experienced and socially calibrated.

The two inexperienced guys go over and open a set, and it looks to be going well. I'm analyzing the pick-up for the natural and explaining certain concepts. Next thing I see one of the guys doing a compliance test straight from the pick-up artist and getting called out on it. Moments later the other quotes a neg from the game. Add to this their poor body language and interference with each other's targets and you have a prime example of how NOT to pickup.
This is exactly the problem. It seems that I'm encountering a fair share of "PUAs" (in their opinion) out in the field and it's becoming a lot more mainstream. I don't see them as a threat and it doesn't bother me, but it becomes an issue when those people are in my social group.

So perhaps I should change the question to, how do I train and co-exist with wannabe PUAs in my social group while I'm still learning myself?

I coach pick up as a hobby in my spare time and I hang out with other coaches all the time, sometimes just for guys night and sometimes to pick up women and I have never had a problem with this no matter how many pick up artists are around. It is all about a level of maturity!
Go to Hulu.com and watch this south park episode "Bebe's Boobs Destroy Society" it's season 6 I believe and you will understand what I am talking about!

_________________
.............
Slywalker

10 things I wish someone taught me about Pick Up 10-things-i-wish-someone-taught-me-vt53087.html