When a girl is acting up (flaking, being disrespectful etc.) some say you're supposed to call her out on her shit so that there are boundaries set and so that she knows she can't carry on disrespecting you. I don't know how to do it though?

At first I used to lose my temper, and I would just scare girls away. I don't think it is that they're not attracted to me. I talked to this girl last week who had flaked on me twice ages ago and I'd lost my temper and had a go at her, she said she would have loved to have met up with me and she really wanted to but it all changed when I did what I did, so obviously she was attracted in the first place, it must be all about how I handled it wrong. I talked to another girl yesterday who said the exact same thing, I can't remember what she'd done now, but I'd called her out on her shit in a pretty nasty way.

Realising I was going wrong losing my temper I tried a different approach with my ex girlfriend. She would ignore texts, not pick up the phone, she flaked once, she would sometimes deliberately ignore me. I decided to tell her this was getting really annoying, but I did it in a calm way. She just found it funny and carried on even more, so I finished her.

I dunno, like how are you supposed to set boundaries and show her that she has to respect you? Without doing it in a nasty way and also without her laughing at you and carrying on? Lol.

The easiest answer is to be someone who gets respect. Rather than just someone who demands respect.

Great. How do I become that guy then? When a girl is acting disrespectful towards me how should I handle it?

This is such a good question, and one I have been struggling with. I have really struggled with this subject this last year. On one hand you want to set the boundaries so that you don’t come across as a pushover, but on the other hand you don’t want to over-react. My issue was trying to set the boundaries but not looking too uptight and anal. I was worried about being too laid back and willing to take shit OR too upfront and aggressive on the subject. Somebody please help!

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~Carmo~

Well here's the truth, if people are being disrespectful, that's because they don't respect you in the first place.

Now if someone is over-stepping your boundries just calmy tell them that and ask them to stop.

If they ignore that or laugh at that.

Then these people didn't respect you to begin with and chances are you need to take a look at your game in general and how people percieve you.

Disprespectful actions are the product of a disrespectful mentality, and that mentality comes from people looking and going "Is this guy worth something?"

If they don't think you are worth something to begin with, then asking them to stop being disrespectful to you is a fruitless expedition.

I thought it must have been something to do with my game, but then I got confused when I started talking to these girls again and they were saying how much they missed me and that they really wanted to see me up until I called them out on their shit.

Thanks foor the advice Fin

tell the person what is bothering you and if that doesnt work:

no contact always leaves an impression..

Anytime man.

They miss you because they did enjoy your company, they didn't respect you at the time and hadn't taken your wants seriously.

Now that cotact is re-established and they have realised that you gave them something, now would be a good way to ensure that they do not forget that you are worth something.