Lets say you're at the mall, you pass by a girl(s) and you wave and say hello and they respond back and say "how are you doing/what's up." This is the part where I get stuck. My brain freezes up and over thinks. Thanks for the advice and sorry about the ambiguous question.

Hey Doc


I go to a lot of stores and i find a lot of the workers cute and all. but how can you tell if they are being nice because its their job, or if its because they have interest?

Also do you think the best way is to just go balls out direct game?

Doctor,
Premature Ejaculation. Tips?

To the Doctor and Moderators...

Before you read any further, please keep in mind that I've already posted a thread of the same question at the newbie section. I'm trying to get both answers with most people, and an expert so... Please, spare this one.

What if... here's what happen:

-You befriend her. She responds "nicely".

-She doesn't give any IOIs (regardless of how much "friendship" you have built with her)...

-You get desperate, and just "share your true feelings" eventually regardless whether or not your social value gets rammed.

-You can't even get to the seduction phase and she says 'let's just be friends".

-What the fuck do you do then???



If that happens, do you think you've pretty much blown the entire thing and just look for the next one? Or is there a way to remedy it? If so, what do you think it is?

...Maybe "reset"?

But... you're not a stranger to her anymore. 90% of the tips you get seem to be about "meeting hot women whom you don't even know the first name of". Not "hot women who already thinks you're a fucking loser".

Thanks.

_________________
There's only one way under high heaven to make anybody do anything... Yes, just one way. That is, by making the other person wanna do it!

hey doc.. I have to say that I'm not a native English speaker.. I'm from Thailand (I'm in UK right now).. I'm not good-looking or handsome and I'm just 5'6.. But white girls (especially those who speak English) are the type of girls that I find attractive. I always get stuck with my Englsih all the time when I approach them (even in the cases that they were not native English speakers)... Is the language barrier or my looks or ethnicity the problem? Any idea how to fix that? I really need your help...
Thank you...

Hello Doc~

#1How do you approach thoese girls, that approaches YOU, but once you're together, YOU are always always always in charge, and you'll eventually run out of ideas and entertainment, and there'd be silence...... how do you deal with that?

#2 You know how you sometimes meet the NATURALS(girls), who generally just gives everybody they meet a fun time, and you happen to also have a real good time with her. Am I just too prideful to never call or contact her again, because I keep thinking"she's probably had as much or even mroe fun than the guy she was with yesterday etc etc?"

Ok so theres these two girls I'm trying to get at, but not quite sure how to deal with them.....

The one with the BF use to call me up to chill occasionally (even though she has a boy) I wasnt really interested in her at the time untill one day she wore a tight shirt and some booty shorts (wierd cause we was just going to starbucks) but any who thats when I started to notice her..... I know there are gonna be other times were she sneaks out her house at night to do whatever with me I just wanna know game this girl up

The one with the EX i barley met her once, got her # she seems to bring the guy up alot, I tried to go see Avatar with her BUT she apparently told her EX she was going to see it with him.... im sure she has one-itis but I'm sure i can get her I just don't know how to get her away from her EX.

_________________
Dont Light The Dynamite, Then Get Mad At The EXPLOSION.....what did you expect?

#1- Well first of why are you so stressed about entertaining her? After a short period of time in the intitial meeting, you don't need to be carrying things anymore. If your talking about overall, there are many things you can do to go have fun with a lady. Bowling, Mini-Golf, A Hike, Gelato, A walk in the park, a movie, a video, a picnic, etc etc etc... If your talking about the first time you meet her, you don't need to be talking more then a couple minutes unless your planning to full close this time... in which case you need to just do what you normally would, ask questions and make statements about things that interest you, by focusing on things you have an interest in you'll be able to find something you are mutually interested in.... build from there.

#2- Your being presumptuous... don't be so arrogant as to think that you can make the choice of if she wants to see you again for her. Contact her and let her make that decision for herself.

It kind of depends on your style, I'd just answer with what I'm doing "I'm out doing some shopping" and then go right into the "talking zone" Where I talk about things that I'm interested in or ask them questions about things I'm interested in. The key is to find points of mutual interest, if you do this you have a great platform to build off of.

Also be observant, if she's holding some shopping bags take a glance, to see where they are from, look at her, her out fit, her friends, her surroundings, look for things that have some connection to things that interest you... this will make the job of finding common interests much easier. You never know if one of those 3 bags she's holding might be from "Gamestop" or something. (Jackpot, lol)

Alright guys I have decided to answer some more questions for folks.

If you have a question that you'd like my opinion on go ahead and post it here. I will be answering questions in this thread as long as it stays on the first page.

Hey Doc...

I can't stop watching animation on your avatar... Every bounce seems like a whole new experience... What should I do ?

if a girl cums many times during sex, but after that there's attraction lost (due to stupidity and neediness on my part), do you think the sexual experience would evoke memories and aid in my cause to regain attraction?

EDIT: by after i mean a few days in between

I'm confused about when/how to show interest and when/how NOT to show interest (active disinterest). From what I gather, you are supposed to show active disinterest (ignoring, negging,etc) when you cold approach, so that the girls will drop their bitch shields and you come in in a non-threatening way.

So when do you start to show interest? I feel like if I wait too long, I come off as a player or get LJBF and if I show interest too soon, I come off as someone who is needy and doesn't get a lot of women. I'm pretty confused about this because I keep reading contradicting material...Some say you should show and tell about lots of girls for social proof, but some say don't do that because you will be labeled as a player.

I just don't know when to play hard to get and when to start showing direct interest and HOW to do this...Sorry doc, I'm all over the place with this question haha. Thanks in advance!

I definitely think it doesn't hurt, really great sex can make up for a lot of things so I think there is a chance. Situations like this are always hard to know exactly what she will do since there are so many person and situation specific variables. That being said this is what I would do.

Don't contact her for a couple of days, then when you do it's back to being the charming, funny, cool guy who got her in bed in the first place. That temporary bout of neediness... it never happened, don't bring it up, just act like it never was. If she brings it up explain with a one line joke and be done with it. The joke would be depending on your personality but something I might say would be "Oh yeah, sorry about that, I forgot to take my Midol that day." and then you move right on to talking about something else. Getting her to focus on the good things will help to get her to forget the bad things.

Honestly I've never much liked this advice because it's trying to mimic what a guy with a lot of options would do when she does something that causes him to become less interested. For it to really work properly you should either be that guy, or have very well developed calibration. Someone who is new to all of this won't have or be either of those things.

Here's my advice remember you have choices and just because she has a vagina doesn't make her god. Give her as much interest as she deserves BASED ON HER PERSONALITY. When your starting it try to pretend that she isn't hot, because sometimes guys get desperate and will show a ridiculous amount of interest just because a girl is cute. I mean your coming up to her... she knows your interested no need to mess around way to much.

Try this. Focus on doing more joking around if you say things in a joking tone it gives you more wiggle room, you can get away with more without being as tuned in.