Ok so heres the deal..
I met a girl who I was very attracted to..probably a 7 but a 9 personality. Met her thru mutual friends..hung out twice with them, and never asked for her number...didnt have to, she offered it.

We spoke on the phone a few days later, a few days AFTER that, we were texting through out the day and she kinda hinted that she wanted to go out. We went out, had a good time alone finally. Had dinner, then took a walk and tallked for a while getting to know one another.

Overall, we had a good/fun time. I kept the date interesting, left a little mystery in myself. Teased her..in the funnest of ways. Had a lot of good laughs.

Heres the tuff/confusing part..
Our second date, We went and had a quick dinner, comedy club, then to be alone, she suggested we goto a quiet lounge.
That is where I think I blew it.

We would start talking, and I would over talk, and even talk about things that you shouldent be talking about on a second date..(Family, work...etc etc...) just stuff thats not fun. When I would try to get to know her a little more..ask questions, I felt like I was getting the short end of the stick.

I would probe her..example, I would start flirting with her, and she wouldent really flirt back much, if at all. I cant tell if shes interested in me, is using me, or just testing me to see how far I'll chase her.

I decided to stop calling her or texting her...and when I would think all hope is lost with this one..she'll do something like text me at 1:30am to see how im doing or say goodnight.

I believe I screwed the date up or gave her the wrong impression of myself on the second date by overtalking...

I dont want her to catagorise me as some obsessive guy whos gonna chase her all the time, so I think its kinda best if I dont call her right now and see if she calls..but at the same time, with the fact that I feel shitty about the last date, I need help redeeming myself somehow. I feel like I was the one who got real comfortable with her, so I was off my game, instead of gaming her.

Any help/advice/critisism is greatly appreciated!!

I would over talk, and even talk about things that you shouldent be talking about on a second date..(Family, work...etc etc...) just stuff thats not fun.

First, I think you answered your own question.

I'm willing to bet money that you got to the second date and freaked out on the inside. If you were doing so well before and then suddenly did this, you merely lost your cool.

No worries though. Keep it up. You bound to realize your a great guy who knows no fear eventually.

Second, you don't need to "redeem" your self. You don't owe her anything and her opinion shouldn't affect your confidence. You know who you are and neither her or anybody else's thoughts about you will change that. Get out of that mind set.


I cant tell if shes interested in me, is using me, or just testing me to see how far I'll chase her.

Third, your over thinking it. It doesn't matter to you because your the man. Don't forget that.

Fourth, let it go for now if you truly believe it went that badly. She's just one girl of many that will come your way because hell, girls want you and men want to be you. I mean look at you. Who wouldn't want that right?

Get in the mindset and you'll be fine.

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Don't think you are, know you are.

I definetly see my mistakes alot...

And you have definetly hit the nail on the head when you say that I over analyze stuff.

I need someone to slap me over the head sometimes to get me back in check with reality...THANKS! lol

No problem. Glad I could help.

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Don't think you are, know you are.