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Website: http://www.pualife.webs.com | A funny article about Fuck buddies with some interesting points:
"For one or more reasons many of us guys would rather not deal with the whole emotional, romantic and of course financial commitment associated with a traditional relationship. That is why the modern culture invented the term Fuck Buddy to describe an ideal relationship that presents itself with everything we like about women (sex and superficial fun) and leaves aside all the things we hate (taking her dog to the vets, family dinners, expensive gifts, doing her dishes, going to the grocery store, giving her foot massages and the other one million annoying things in a traditional relationship). As a keen observer of the current human society I have managed to organize and label this type of relationship in five different subcategories.
** THE GOLD DIGGER **
How you can tell: It seems like every time you need to see her for the legitimate purpose of having to release some pressure she would rather ask you if you’re available during the weekend because she feels like getting out of town and spend some time at a nice hotel. She’s also a little too interested in talking about your work and she gets really excited when she finds out that things are going good-to-better for you. She’s also gonna complain about lack of attention and strangely enough that ends as soon as you buy her something that doesn’t look too cheap. The worst type of gold diggers are the ones that actually come over to your place every now and then and get all emotional and sad and when asked what is wrong, they complain about their landlord needing the rent money one week earlier…
What’s cool about it: If you make enough money to be able to sustain this type of fuck buddy and don’t break the bank, then you’re in for the ride of your life. These chicks are usually smart enough to be able to charm men into doing their bidding. They’re also well groomed, beautiful and very talented and ambitious in bed. They won’t demand any kind of emotional discharge from you.
What sucks about it: If you don’t deliver anymore then she won’t deliver either. If she finds someone that’s significantly better off than you are she’s gonna play the double game until she makes sure she can master the other guy too and never return your calls. She will probably demand more and more. You don’t know if she’s faking it, if she finds you attractive or if she actually cares about your high-school stories.
How to keep her in this position: Deliver, but don’t overdo it. I trust you!
** THE WANNABE GIRLFRIEND **
How you can tell: The clues are literally within the thousands. They will wanna hold hands, they will wanna watch movies, they will ask about your family, they will want to meet your friends. When you try and remind her of her position in a way that’s not gonna hurt her feelings she’s gonna laugh about it and pretend she understands. She’ll casually ask who you were just on the phone with like she’d ask if you watched the news last night. She’ll find reasons to sleep over.
What’s cool about it: She likes you for the intended purpose of your birth – to rock women’s hearts. She’s also gonna be more available than your ordinary fuck buddy.
What sucks about it: If you are not interested in responding with the same type of feelings and have no intention of getting warped around a relationship with her, then you’re in for some drama in the long run. You can also expect “What-Are-Doing-Tonight-Wanna-Go-Rollerskating” type of calls. You will “casually” meet her friends and possibly even family.
How to keep her in this position: If you’re pretty sure she’s a wannabe girlfriend, then I suggest you call it quits while it’s still warm. If you have no regard about other people’s feelings then you can go ahead and do whatever comes to mind to her, she’s not gonna be the one ending it first.
** THE REAL DEAL **
How you can tell: This one should be fairly easy to identify as well. She will only call and ask about your schedule when she’s horny. Usually she’s a solid member of the society, with a decent job, sometimes with a little power and financial security. She’s gonna drive an SUV or a sports car. If you just happen to have a TV on and there’s something on that’s even remotely sexist she’ll laugh it off like nothing: she’s a strong, modern woman. She will demand sex when she wants, she’s gonna feel absolutely free to tell you about how she likes it when you go down on her. She’s probably carrying a vibrator in her purse. She likes to wear business outfits. Her despise will be evident if you ever go emotional on her. She wants it when she wants it and you better deliver good service. Sometimes you feel intimidated by her. Some of them will not be single outside your casual relationship.
What’s cool about it: She could have picked anyone, but you’re the one that pushes her erotic buttons. She will not cause any drama, will understand if you’re busy working in the middle of the night. Has to wake up early as she’s got important meetings to attend so she won’t be sleeping over too often. She’ll probably like porn just as much as you do. She’s willing to try it all.
What sucks about it: Sometimes you’re not gonna feel like a man’s man. Sometimes she’ll complain about your service after you couldn’t/didn’t feel like doing it for the third time. You usually can not contact her, she’s probably gonna request your service more likely than wait until you get in touch.
How to keep her in this position: This should be pretty easy as she’s not even gonna ask for more than what you’re giving to her now. Try and don’t neglect hygiene, go to the gym regularly, wear nice clothes. Remember, she likes your masculinity so don’t go all cuddle slut on her.
** THE EX **
How you can tell: I’m pretty sure it’s easy. If you parted on good terms with your ex and it wasn’t your sex life that was wrong with the relationship then you can milk her attraction to you for quite a while.
What’s cool about it: You know her well enough to avoid some of the awkwardness. You know she’s not a completely different person in her life outside your relationship. You’ll always feel better about yourself because the chick that dumped you because you treated her like shit is still attracted enough to you to give you a free pass.
What sucks about it: There’s always a fine line between what you guys had before and what you’re having now. She will try and talk about it. She will get you to run errands for her since you know her usual schedule already. She’s gonna wanna drive your car when hers is at the shop. She will sometimes pretend to not understand that you’re not together anymore and that your money is not you guys’ anymore. She will remind you about her mom’s birthday. If your friends know about this newly found casual thingy between you two they might think you’re getting back together and spread the word so you’re suddenly not game to anyone else.
How to keep her in this position: Avoid any talking about what you guys had in the past. Do not tell her that the chick you cheated on her with while together had way better boobs. Don’t indulge into anything that resembles your previous relationship: cooking your favorite meal together, watching “Grey’s Anatomy”, walk the dogs, cuddling, calling her mom to see what she’s up to. Stay focused on the target and remember you’re the man.
** THE ONE YOU WANNA GET WITH **
How you can tell: You find yourself driving around and thinking something like : “Hm, whats-her-face would like this song” or thinking that maybe you should ask her out sometimes instead of just having her over. She mentioned she likes Greece so you’re saving up for a surprise getaway trip for two next summer. Your mom wants to know if you’re seeing someone and you tell her “kind of” instead of “Who, me? Nah”. You like it when she sleeps over and you cook her breakfast but act all too casual about it like it’s nothing. You wanna know what her favorite dogs are and if she wants to live in a different city or get a different job. You ask her in passing if she ever considered having kids. You tell her childhood stories that make you look all dorky and emotional. You call her when “Grey’s Anatomy” is on. (Yeah, I know I’m mentioning that show for the second time, I’ve got my own reasons, don’t ask)
What’s cool about it: Not too much, but hey, now you know you’re capable of being sweet right?
What sucks about it: Umm, where to start? You’re probably gonna get burned badly. You will look like less of a man in her eyes. Texting her and asking how her day went will be frowned upon by your drinking buddies (and herself for that matter). You will not be able to function at high levels. You will waste valuable brain energy on her. There will be drama and I repeat: it’s your ass that’s getting burned.
How to keep her in this position: Unless you can smarten up and grow out of it, then just go mature on her and confront her with the situation. Most likely since you guys are already on fuck buddy status she will not want to rush into a real relationship and she’ll be content with the current one. My advice: GTFO, there’s plenty of booty out there."
From: http://standardmadness.com/columns/the- ... n-can-have
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Last edited by xfman on Fri Mar 12, 2010 12:26 am, edited 1 time in total.
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